coffee shop snippet #talents
“Blowjobs,” Fabian declared.
“Huh?” Ren asked.
“You remarked on the difference in the dynamic here at the coffee shop on a Saturday morning. It’s all about blowjobs.”
“Not following you,” Ren replied.
“Don’t worry, most people don’t follow him. In fact, he follows me!” Tara explained.
“That’s because your ass is cuter,” Fabian said.
Tara flipped him off.
“Look at the people coming in and out of here, Ren. On a typical workday, the majority of people here are women. They run in to get their coffee, so they’re not so grumpy by the time they get to work,” Fabian explained.
Ren looked around the coffee shop. It was ten o’clock in the morning.
“And on Saturday, it’s all men,” he observed.
“Exactly! Now, why is that? Two reasons. One,” Fabian raised his index finger, “Is that the women aren’t going to work. They’re still in bed. The only women you see in here today are moms with strollers. They’re up even though it’s not a work day, because the baby doesn’t give a shit.”
“Good point, and two?” Ren asked.
“Two is that women, as a rule, don’t like morning sex,” Fabian stated.
“I beg your pardon!” Tara said, setting down her cup.
“Have a seat, Creole Princess. You’re an outlier,” her husband replied.
“You want morning sex, Ren? It can be arranged,” Tara said, licking the rim of her cup.
“Stoppit, so I can present my theory,” Fabian said.
Tara pulled her foot back from Ren’s calf. Ren exhaled deeply.
Fabian laughed.
“OK, back to my theory. Women don’t really care for morning sex. They certainly don’t want it early on a day when they don’t have to get up and go to work. If there’s one thing that will guarantee that they won’t get laid for days, it’s when a man tries to cajole his lover into morning sex.”
“So they go to the coffee shop,” Ren said.
“Yes! And the smart ones take the children with them. The get them muffins that aren’t as full of sugar as donuts, so they’re not bouncing off the walls later. Mom sleeps in. Later, kids take naps. And dad-”
“Gets a blowjob!” Tara finished.
“It’s all about the blowjob,” Fabian concluded.
“Huh?” Ren asked.
“You remarked on the difference in the dynamic here at the coffee shop on a Saturday morning. It’s all about blowjobs.”
“Not following you,” Ren replied.
“Don’t worry, most people don’t follow him. In fact, he follows me!” Tara explained.
“That’s because your ass is cuter,” Fabian said.
Tara flipped him off.
“Look at the people coming in and out of here, Ren. On a typical workday, the majority of people here are women. They run in to get their coffee, so they’re not so grumpy by the time they get to work,” Fabian explained.
Ren looked around the coffee shop. It was ten o’clock in the morning.
“And on Saturday, it’s all men,” he observed.
“Exactly! Now, why is that? Two reasons. One,” Fabian raised his index finger, “Is that the women aren’t going to work. They’re still in bed. The only women you see in here today are moms with strollers. They’re up even though it’s not a work day, because the baby doesn’t give a shit.”
“Good point, and two?” Ren asked.
“Two is that women, as a rule, don’t like morning sex,” Fabian stated.
“I beg your pardon!” Tara said, setting down her cup.
“Have a seat, Creole Princess. You’re an outlier,” her husband replied.
“You want morning sex, Ren? It can be arranged,” Tara said, licking the rim of her cup.
“Stoppit, so I can present my theory,” Fabian said.
Tara pulled her foot back from Ren’s calf. Ren exhaled deeply.
Fabian laughed.
“OK, back to my theory. Women don’t really care for morning sex. They certainly don’t want it early on a day when they don’t have to get up and go to work. If there’s one thing that will guarantee that they won’t get laid for days, it’s when a man tries to cajole his lover into morning sex.”
“So they go to the coffee shop,” Ren said.
“Yes! And the smart ones take the children with them. The get them muffins that aren’t as full of sugar as donuts, so they’re not bouncing off the walls later. Mom sleeps in. Later, kids take naps. And dad-”
“Gets a blowjob!” Tara finished.
“It’s all about the blowjob,” Fabian concluded.