Jul 25, 2012 22:39
I feel a little inspired to write this post because today was a bad pain day.
There is this thing that I have noticed.
Many people will ask how I am doing with regard to chronic pain/etc. in light of the surgery I had in January. I don't really mind this, and my stock answer is to truthfully state that I have much less pain than I used to, and I no longer have to take any medications. Unfortunately, the diet is still restricted, but at least now when I follow it, I very rarely experience pain.
Smaller portions/more frequent meals are hard to get used to, but I'm managing.
For most people, that is enough information, and the conversation ends there.
If I haven't talked to someone in a long time, they might want to know The Surgery Story, where I talk about how my stay in the hospital was akin to an alternate Hell dimension.
But in each of my social circles, there is a person or two who will wait to catch me alone, and then say something like, "But how do you really feel?" or "But what does it feel like, when you have pain?" or "Do you really have some pain every day?"
To the latter question, I usually cheerfully say, "Yes, but it's way less agonizing than it used to be!"
What is up with this reaction? Is it like, people don't know what else to talk about so that's how they try to get closer to me? Is it a fascination with the glamor and horror of chronic pain?
I don't get it. I assume that this doesn't only happen to me; I'm wondering what other people think of this type of conversation.
For the people with whom I have it, they are never malicious, in fact sort of the opposite. I just never know how to respond.
pain,
bodies,
ableism