Fate is entirely too cruel
I need to just get my thoughts in order and the best way I feel I can do that is to just start writing everything down. So sit down and read as I pour my heart out to you.
Things are best started on thurday I believe. I spent the day in Boston at the Museum of Science with Melanie and Judith. I must say that it was the best thing in the world because it was both a nostalgic trip but there was so much there to relearn and see. It was simply amazing. And there was a star wars exhibit and we watched a show in the planetarium. The ride back was fine then I got home and my mom told me my auntie Joy, my great-aunt Joy who at age 80 had more vitality, sharpness and wit in her pinky than anyone else I could ever imagine had died from her cancers.
There is nothing worse than going from a wonderful (natural) high to a depressingly sad low. It's like being kicked in the balls (guys) or punched in the breasts (women). There is pain, shock, numbness of both mind and body and an undeniable knowledge that something has been taken from you that you can never retrieve. There is nothing more precious than life. Not wealth, not power, not even love. My mother told me than apologized because it was over the phone. I don't care if you told me through a singing telegram. The same news means the same thing, another of my kin was stolen.
Then, of course, the next day I had to trek up to Vermont for my cousin Bat Mitzvah. I had to stowaway my emotions and replace them with feelings too saccharine. And it is not fair, for me or for her. This was special to her and why should she not recieve anything but my honest pride and happiness for her.
Her party was held at the local museum, the Montshire Children's Museum. During the cocktail hour I hid away to explore the exhibits. The place isn't that big so my hiding wasn't easily managed but I was able to find an incredibly interesting exhibit that captivated me for quite some time. On the third floor, on a landing probably no bigger than your average bedroom was an exhibit on Fog and how air moves and flows.
The constant churning and ceaselessness of it as it flowed about the space was hypnotic and I remember staying there and thinking nothing and simply just watching how air reacts. It seems almost too coincidental that it worked so well metaphorically.
So I came home and today was the funeral. A fairly short service then a long trek out to Sharon, MA to where everyone and there mother (literally) if you are jewish and from the North Shore are buried. She was buried not 15 feet from my grandfather, 10 from my grandfathers parents, about 30 or so from my grandfather's late sister and who knows who else.
There's more that I want to say but I am desperately tired and falling asleep. As it is my eyes are half blurred at the screen but I needed to get this out. Send love in the form of love and goodnight.
Things are best started on thurday I believe. I spent the day in Boston at the Museum of Science with Melanie and Judith. I must say that it was the best thing in the world because it was both a nostalgic trip but there was so much there to relearn and see. It was simply amazing. And there was a star wars exhibit and we watched a show in the planetarium. The ride back was fine then I got home and my mom told me my auntie Joy, my great-aunt Joy who at age 80 had more vitality, sharpness and wit in her pinky than anyone else I could ever imagine had died from her cancers.
There is nothing worse than going from a wonderful (natural) high to a depressingly sad low. It's like being kicked in the balls (guys) or punched in the breasts (women). There is pain, shock, numbness of both mind and body and an undeniable knowledge that something has been taken from you that you can never retrieve. There is nothing more precious than life. Not wealth, not power, not even love. My mother told me than apologized because it was over the phone. I don't care if you told me through a singing telegram. The same news means the same thing, another of my kin was stolen.
Then, of course, the next day I had to trek up to Vermont for my cousin Bat Mitzvah. I had to stowaway my emotions and replace them with feelings too saccharine. And it is not fair, for me or for her. This was special to her and why should she not recieve anything but my honest pride and happiness for her.
Her party was held at the local museum, the Montshire Children's Museum. During the cocktail hour I hid away to explore the exhibits. The place isn't that big so my hiding wasn't easily managed but I was able to find an incredibly interesting exhibit that captivated me for quite some time. On the third floor, on a landing probably no bigger than your average bedroom was an exhibit on Fog and how air moves and flows.
The constant churning and ceaselessness of it as it flowed about the space was hypnotic and I remember staying there and thinking nothing and simply just watching how air reacts. It seems almost too coincidental that it worked so well metaphorically.
So I came home and today was the funeral. A fairly short service then a long trek out to Sharon, MA to where everyone and there mother (literally) if you are jewish and from the North Shore are buried. She was buried not 15 feet from my grandfather, 10 from my grandfathers parents, about 30 or so from my grandfather's late sister and who knows who else.
There's more that I want to say but I am desperately tired and falling asleep. As it is my eyes are half blurred at the screen but I needed to get this out. Send love in the form of love and goodnight.