Is Anybody Out There?
A whirlpool of thoughts,
A mess of emotion,
Confusion and anguish
Threaten to consume me.
Three long years,
I thought it was gone,
And now it's back,
Mem'ries stronger then before.
I cannot sleep,
I cannot think,
Thoughts drift 'round and 'round
Demanding to be noticed.
Where did this come from?
How did this door open?
I thought I locked it,
Bolted it tightly
And now, I realize
It was never bolted at all.
I had merely closed the door
And propped a chair beneath
The wobbly handle.
I childishly believed
This device would
Keep these happenings at bay.
But now, in full force,
The pain, the ache
The humiliation,
The hatred,
Have all returned
And feel
So much stronger
Then before.
I am at a chasm,
A waterfall roaring
Not far below me,
My mem'ries echo
Out of its watery
Depths. My feet
Are on slippery
Moss and I feel
Myself sliding forward,
My shoes loosing purchase
Against the deadly mud
And lichen.
I scream, so loudly
But it seems as though
I have never even
Made a sound.
The waterfall drowns
Out my voice,
Hides my screams,
Masks my pain.
I long for release,
Sweet bliss which
Would stop this
Seemingly endless slide
To my own destruction.
I need to find a balance
Sooner, rather then later,
Because later may be too late.
I might slip,
Fall,
Tumble into the icy
Swirl
Which will drown me,
Destroy me,
And give me no moment
Of the peace I seek.
If only there was
Someone standing there,
Anyone near enough
To throw me a rope,
To give me their hand,
To help me pull
Myself up from the
Chasm's deadly grip.
Someone who heard
My screams,
Over the rushing water
And rushed to my aid.
Someone who I could,
In an instant,
Trust without fear
Of rejection or pain.
Someone who would
Not judge
My extremely
Precarious plight
And would, instead,
Offer a towel so
I could dry myself
And wipe away my silent tears.
Isn't there anyone,
Anyone at all,
Who is close enough
To help me in some small way?
A mess of emotion,
Confusion and anguish
Threaten to consume me.
Three long years,
I thought it was gone,
And now it's back,
Mem'ries stronger then before.
I cannot sleep,
I cannot think,
Thoughts drift 'round and 'round
Demanding to be noticed.
Where did this come from?
How did this door open?
I thought I locked it,
Bolted it tightly
And now, I realize
It was never bolted at all.
I had merely closed the door
And propped a chair beneath
The wobbly handle.
I childishly believed
This device would
Keep these happenings at bay.
But now, in full force,
The pain, the ache
The humiliation,
The hatred,
Have all returned
And feel
So much stronger
Then before.
I am at a chasm,
A waterfall roaring
Not far below me,
My mem'ries echo
Out of its watery
Depths. My feet
Are on slippery
Moss and I feel
Myself sliding forward,
My shoes loosing purchase
Against the deadly mud
And lichen.
I scream, so loudly
But it seems as though
I have never even
Made a sound.
The waterfall drowns
Out my voice,
Hides my screams,
Masks my pain.
I long for release,
Sweet bliss which
Would stop this
Seemingly endless slide
To my own destruction.
I need to find a balance
Sooner, rather then later,
Because later may be too late.
I might slip,
Fall,
Tumble into the icy
Swirl
Which will drown me,
Destroy me,
And give me no moment
Of the peace I seek.
If only there was
Someone standing there,
Anyone near enough
To throw me a rope,
To give me their hand,
To help me pull
Myself up from the
Chasm's deadly grip.
Someone who heard
My screams,
Over the rushing water
And rushed to my aid.
Someone who I could,
In an instant,
Trust without fear
Of rejection or pain.
Someone who would
Not judge
My extremely
Precarious plight
And would, instead,
Offer a towel so
I could dry myself
And wipe away my silent tears.
Isn't there anyone,
Anyone at all,
Who is close enough
To help me in some small way?