Unexpected family
So, last Friday I found out that I, apparently, have a brother and a sister I never heard about before.
Short back story: my mom had been married two or three times, but never to my dad. Actually, I am more like a coincidence than anything else. She was in a relationship with that older married guy when she was around my age, and - here I am!
To be honest, I don’t know all details coz it used to upset her a lot when I was asking these questions when I was little, so I stopped. And then at some point it just down one me - why would I care about someone who never bothered to be a part of our lives? I know he promised her to get a divorce, and of course he didn’t, but if he wanted to have something to do with us he still would, right?
Anyway, yesterday was mom’s b-day, and she was getting a lot of calls/letters/mails with b-day greeting lately. Apparently, someone from her past, someone who knew the story, called her and they started talking about good old days and stuff. And that woman mentioned my father’s other family and his two kids who are around my age. And mom told me then….
I have no idea how I really feel about it. I have a really complicated relationship with the family that I already know to add some strangers into the mix, beside they don’t live around so I can’t just go and knock on their door. And I don’t think they even know about me because you wouldn’t go around and speak about your illegitimate child to your other children, right? I don’t think he told them anything.
It just feels… weird, you know? I used to consider my mother my only family (no, the other family members that I have around are just people that I have to tolerate every now and then, they are not family in the full meaning to me) and now I know it is not exactly true. I have zero respect for my biological father and he may very well go right to hell for being somewhere else for the last 26 years, but I have to admit that I am curious about my brother and sister and what they look like and what kind of people they are.
But I know that I won’t dig now. Maybe later, maybe at some point it would be a good idea but now I just want to try and digest the news. My head is still spinning a little :P
Short back story: my mom had been married two or three times, but never to my dad. Actually, I am more like a coincidence than anything else. She was in a relationship with that older married guy when she was around my age, and - here I am!
To be honest, I don’t know all details coz it used to upset her a lot when I was asking these questions when I was little, so I stopped. And then at some point it just down one me - why would I care about someone who never bothered to be a part of our lives? I know he promised her to get a divorce, and of course he didn’t, but if he wanted to have something to do with us he still would, right?
Anyway, yesterday was mom’s b-day, and she was getting a lot of calls/letters/mails with b-day greeting lately. Apparently, someone from her past, someone who knew the story, called her and they started talking about good old days and stuff. And that woman mentioned my father’s other family and his two kids who are around my age. And mom told me then….
I have no idea how I really feel about it. I have a really complicated relationship with the family that I already know to add some strangers into the mix, beside they don’t live around so I can’t just go and knock on their door. And I don’t think they even know about me because you wouldn’t go around and speak about your illegitimate child to your other children, right? I don’t think he told them anything.
It just feels… weird, you know? I used to consider my mother my only family (no, the other family members that I have around are just people that I have to tolerate every now and then, they are not family in the full meaning to me) and now I know it is not exactly true. I have zero respect for my biological father and he may very well go right to hell for being somewhere else for the last 26 years, but I have to admit that I am curious about my brother and sister and what they look like and what kind of people they are.
But I know that I won’t dig now. Maybe later, maybe at some point it would be a good idea but now I just want to try and digest the news. My head is still spinning a little :P