TOWJWAGABI, The REAL Part 6

[myrna1_2_3]

Oh my GOD, I'm an idiot! I neglected to include a whole final part to this entry!

The additional part starts after Brian strolls out of the coffee shop.

DOH!

Comments

[just_for_kicks]

So happy for this update, because I love this story =0) Though Dan may be a super guy, I still don't like him. In a lot of ways, he reminds me of Ethan (his appeal to Justin, the safety, the romance, his speaking for Justin), which may be why I don't like him. What I think is going to be his/their fundamental problem is that, as Dan said, he is used to being the ONE for Justin, and now that things are changing, now that Justin is changing (or really going back to who he really is), it'll be only too easy to blame Brian for everything that goes wrong (which he is doing.) I don't think he really gets Justin, or at least doesn't see it. He doesn't understand that part of him thats a bit of an exhibitionist, or that gives and receives love the Debbie way (which makes me think he's pretty much oblivious to the real parts of Justin's past), and maybe even the importance of art in his life, what it means to him. He also reminds me a bit of Brian (after the bashing) when he says "I thought we hashed all this out..." like its done, move on, even though Justin may need to talk about it, may need to feel/understand the guilt so he can move on from it.

Not to say Brian isn't meddling, because he totally is. But as much as he gets Justin thinking, he doesn't control him, which I think is one of the reasons they broke up. Brian needs to be on top of things in his life (if that was a pun it wasn't intended) and Justin was the wildcard--he stayed when Brian said go, he loved when Brian said don't. So by Brian's standards he had to go, but I think Brian counted on Justin's resilience to bounce back, and that's not what happened. I love that he's admitting he fucked up though, that he thinks Justin is so much better, worth so much more than what he is doing right now. That he gets him.

Justin needs to move out, I think, needs to find out who he is and figure out what he is and has been doing. One of my favorite Brian lines in Season 3 has always been the 301 "I never loved him, and even if I did I would never ask him to change himself, or be something he's not to make me happy." or something along those lines. Which is another reason Brian had to get him out. But Justin got free, and had to opportunity to really find himself on his own, and then circumstances didn't let that happen. Right now especially, I think, Justin needs to be with Justin. To deal with his mother's death alone. To be alone, because he's been with someone, relied on someone since he was 17. He needs to make decisions for himself, not to make Dan or Brian happy, or to spite either one of them but for himself.

And I'm done =0) Can't wait for the next part!

[just_for_kicks]

I just reread this part again, and still love it. And I've decided I would love to see a Dan going to Babylon part. I can just picture it, going in and Dan being kind of horrified while Justin is right at home, Brian pulling Justin out to dance while totally high and drunk, and Ted or Emmett or Mikey trying to tell Dan it means nothing but making it worse, so he cuts in and has even less rhythm than Brian which is really saying something, and when Brian goes off to the backroom Dan is like thats horrible while Justin kind of looks longingly in that direction because he does kind of miss that part of his life. =0) Its Justin's intensity I miss, when he's with Dan. Five minutes with Brian and he's ranting and angry, and feeling, being the passionate, bit of a queen guy that he is. With Dan he seems sort of complacent. And though its not his fault, because he doesn't know, Dan isn't really looking below the surface of what Justin shows. Whereas Brian is all you're not the person your pretending to be, and he's kind of right.

[myrna1_2_3]

Thanks so much for the thoughtful comments!

it'll be only too easy to blame Brian for everything that goes wrong (which he is doing.)

Right now, Dan just thinks Brian is messing with Justin--purposefully upsetting him and making him doubt himself. Dan objects to Brian mistreating Justin more so than meddling in the relationship Dan and Justin have.

I think Brian counted on Justin's resilience to bounce back, and that's not what happened.

Absolutely. If someone had taken Brian aside and shown him the future before he dumped Justin, I think he still would have dumped him, but in a less hysterical, frenzied way.

I love that he's admitting he fucked up though, that he thinks Justin is so much better, worth so much more than what he is doing right now. That he gets him.

The problem with temporary insanity is that it's temporary! Now Brian has to face what he did and try to figure out a way to redeem himself!

He needs to make decisions for himself, not to make Dan or Brian happy, or to spite either one of them but for himself.

I think this is what Justin is starting to realize!