Loser with a chimp on his back smoking a blunt.
Loser with a chimp on his back smoking a blunt.
I know that title made no sense, but do I ever make sense when I write? Yeah that's right, NEVER. I guess I haven't really been updating this piece of junk lately but I've been lazy. For some reason I still feel depressed day in and day out these days for some reason. I really did try to have fun last night with Jen and I tried to get her mind off of Frank but it seems like she is like focused on him 24/7. Even though she said she is over him. Which is a load of shit. If you were over him you wouldn't care to check his away messages or care what he is doing. Then maybe that's how I am. I don't know. I just recantly saw a link in her AIM profile for her journal and I had no idea what it was at the time might I add. I thought it was for poetry again and I was like let's see what she wrote about today and then I saw her personal thoughts there and I couldn't help but read on. So I read a few journals and from the looks of things she isn't over Frank. I guess she was having Nightmares and was depressed lately so I was like before we went to the talk I was like I better try to make the outing as fun as possible to try and cheer her up but it didn't seem to help her. Through out the night it was Frank this and Frank that. She must be in a lot of pain or something from him. Frank is just a fucking moron for dumping her. I'm not sure what there is else to say to try and talk with her about this issue. I want to cheer up but it seems to be sooooo hard to get her mind away from Frank for a few mins. Well I'll keep trying. I'm glad she found Jess-e and Chris and other kids on that floor to hang out with. Maybe now she can get on with her life. Then again maybe she can't get on with her life because her life is so connected to his by friends and other things. Oh Well it's not my problem to be getting into in the first place.
I just woke my brother up early I guess today at 11:40am. I guess that's early I don't know anymore. I have some fucked up sleeping habits now. I was just scared that he wasn't alright being the weird kid I am. I just have a fear everyone else in my family is as depressed as me and I want to make everything better. I guess I'm fucked up like that or something. I keep IMing my sister asking how things are going and to in my weird way to make sure she isn't depressed. I really don't want to have other feel like me. If I could I would take everyone else's pain and suffer for everyone else. I was really scared that my brother wasn't alright either because everytime I called him I never got an answer for the last two weeks. I just wanted to make sure he was doing ok too. I guess I think everyone is as depressed as me but maybe they aren't. I'm trying to move on but it seems to be soooooo fucking hard. How can you move on without any support from family or friends? I am just so sick of feeling like this. Man o man I just hate this feeling that is pouring into me day after day. Soon I'm going to overflow.
I know that title made no sense, but do I ever make sense when I write? Yeah that's right, NEVER. I guess I haven't really been updating this piece of junk lately but I've been lazy. For some reason I still feel depressed day in and day out these days for some reason. I really did try to have fun last night with Jen and I tried to get her mind off of Frank but it seems like she is like focused on him 24/7. Even though she said she is over him. Which is a load of shit. If you were over him you wouldn't care to check his away messages or care what he is doing. Then maybe that's how I am. I don't know. I just recantly saw a link in her AIM profile for her journal and I had no idea what it was at the time might I add. I thought it was for poetry again and I was like let's see what she wrote about today and then I saw her personal thoughts there and I couldn't help but read on. So I read a few journals and from the looks of things she isn't over Frank. I guess she was having Nightmares and was depressed lately so I was like before we went to the talk I was like I better try to make the outing as fun as possible to try and cheer her up but it didn't seem to help her. Through out the night it was Frank this and Frank that. She must be in a lot of pain or something from him. Frank is just a fucking moron for dumping her. I'm not sure what there is else to say to try and talk with her about this issue. I want to cheer up but it seems to be sooooo hard to get her mind away from Frank for a few mins. Well I'll keep trying. I'm glad she found Jess-e and Chris and other kids on that floor to hang out with. Maybe now she can get on with her life. Then again maybe she can't get on with her life because her life is so connected to his by friends and other things. Oh Well it's not my problem to be getting into in the first place.
I just woke my brother up early I guess today at 11:40am. I guess that's early I don't know anymore. I have some fucked up sleeping habits now. I was just scared that he wasn't alright being the weird kid I am. I just have a fear everyone else in my family is as depressed as me and I want to make everything better. I guess I'm fucked up like that or something. I keep IMing my sister asking how things are going and to in my weird way to make sure she isn't depressed. I really don't want to have other feel like me. If I could I would take everyone else's pain and suffer for everyone else. I was really scared that my brother wasn't alright either because everytime I called him I never got an answer for the last two weeks. I just wanted to make sure he was doing ok too. I guess I think everyone is as depressed as me but maybe they aren't. I'm trying to move on but it seems to be soooooo fucking hard. How can you move on without any support from family or friends? I am just so sick of feeling like this. Man o man I just hate this feeling that is pouring into me day after day. Soon I'm going to overflow.