rantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrantrant
my arm wakes me up after about an hour and a half of rest, fwee, let's be frustrated and throw pillows and curse and glare and cough, and cough.
my fingers are stiff and my (meager) muscles ache from holding up this so-called light, hi-tech metal.
my nostrils and sinuses are clogged with softballs of the same mucus that my brain is swimming in, that is dripping, dripping down my throat. sneeze x10.
my eyeballs burn like hellfire, i cough and it's that familiar razorblade feeling and quarter, nickle, & dime-sized clumps of blackishgreenishyellowish shit.
oh, and i think i may have cracked one of my back molars a few days ago.
i still cannot make a fist, not entirely.
my sutures come out wednesday, which is fucking superb.
earlier today was great, i saw katie and angela. it's been a while since i've seen either of them, but much, much longer since i've seen angela. she's cleanish now- more power to her, i'm thinking of renouncing ganj and the like (again, but with augmenting gusto). why just a few weeks back i was thinking of calling her up and catching up.. but life happens, y'know? you lose your cell, you break your arm, you forget. then she remembers for me and i have her phone number again.
i have not had a painkiller in two days.
i have seen the lovely miss noel once since falling out of that goddamn tree & have spoken to her oh-so rarely. not like i can go out and find her, or call her house (lost cell, lost numbers).
i have no appetite.
i am losing weight.
one hundred and twnty-three pounds but that red needle would likely go down two or three or four pounds if i could finally take a decent shit.
this morning we thought my fever broke, but we were wrong.
i am unsure of why i am posting this, but it us certainly not for you.
or you.
or you.
or you.
or you.
or you.
or you.
or anyone but me, so in hindsight the present will be that much better.
orsomethin'.
p.s. fuckyou, god.
my fingers are stiff and my (meager) muscles ache from holding up this so-called light, hi-tech metal.
my nostrils and sinuses are clogged with softballs of the same mucus that my brain is swimming in, that is dripping, dripping down my throat. sneeze x10.
my eyeballs burn like hellfire, i cough and it's that familiar razorblade feeling and quarter, nickle, & dime-sized clumps of blackishgreenishyellowish shit.
oh, and i think i may have cracked one of my back molars a few days ago.
i still cannot make a fist, not entirely.
my sutures come out wednesday, which is fucking superb.
earlier today was great, i saw katie and angela. it's been a while since i've seen either of them, but much, much longer since i've seen angela. she's cleanish now- more power to her, i'm thinking of renouncing ganj and the like (again, but with augmenting gusto). why just a few weeks back i was thinking of calling her up and catching up.. but life happens, y'know? you lose your cell, you break your arm, you forget. then she remembers for me and i have her phone number again.
i have not had a painkiller in two days.
i have seen the lovely miss noel once since falling out of that goddamn tree & have spoken to her oh-so rarely. not like i can go out and find her, or call her house (lost cell, lost numbers).
i have no appetite.
i am losing weight.
one hundred and twnty-three pounds but that red needle would likely go down two or three or four pounds if i could finally take a decent shit.
this morning we thought my fever broke, but we were wrong.
i am unsure of why i am posting this, but it us certainly not for you.
or you.
or you.
or you.
or you.
or you.
or you.
or anyone but me, so in hindsight the present will be that much better.
orsomethin'.
p.s. fuckyou, god.