what I want most is what I'll never have
I hate being me.
I hate hurting the people I love. And I do it all the time. I don't want to do this anymore. I'm emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausted. I don't have anything left. I'm a terrible person and I'm tired of realizing that when it's too late. I'm tired of taking meds that don't do shit. 3 pills in the mornig and 4 at night and I'm still fucked up.
I'm worse than I thought I was. And I can't stop crying.
I'm quitting smoking because I don't want to die. But sometimes that just doesn't matter. I'm going strong this time. I think I can do it. I just don't want to lose momentum. It's so close to falling apart.
I'm losing control of my life. And I don't have the energy to get it back.
I hate hurting the people I love. And I do it all the time. I don't want to do this anymore. I'm emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausted. I don't have anything left. I'm a terrible person and I'm tired of realizing that when it's too late. I'm tired of taking meds that don't do shit. 3 pills in the mornig and 4 at night and I'm still fucked up.
I'm worse than I thought I was. And I can't stop crying.
I'm quitting smoking because I don't want to die. But sometimes that just doesn't matter. I'm going strong this time. I think I can do it. I just don't want to lose momentum. It's so close to falling apart.
I'm losing control of my life. And I don't have the energy to get it back.