Misunderstood
I've been an LJ user for just less than 2 months and it's quite surprising to see myself already embroiled in a predicament. I actually consider my LJ as an extended F4Pilipinas forum because yun mga LJ friends ko, mga MSP friends ko lang din. ^_^
Everything started way back before the concert last March. I was chatting with overseas JMs and they told me stories... stories that I wish I was never told because I love F4, as in each and every one of them. My F2 may change depending on who is the most visible but nevertheless, I love the 4 of them... However, I was chatting with them on an almost-daily basis and I guess everyone's feeling the pressure. If you think F4 lang ang napressure sa concerts last March, think again... It was actually quite common to see the nasty backstabbing among different fan groups in order to promote their F1s...
I then watched the HK concerts surrounded by such mindset. And I cried during the third night of the concert when Jerry carried ZaiZai at the end of the show because I felt so overwhelmed. I keep on mentioning this pero it's true, sobra kong napressure sa mga tickets namin. And seeing the 4 of them having so much fun in the stage just truly overwhelmed me. I felt that everything I had experienced in preparing for the concerts was soo worth it. Moreover, I felt guilty because for a time, I was like one of those people who dislike ZaiZai because of his fans. For me, it never came to a point that I disliked Jerry. It was more like he was my least favorite among the 4 because of his fans...
After the concert, I used to visit a Jerry-forum because I was looking for DLs for my sister. And since ang hilig ko talaga magbasa even if I was aware that I am in an "enemy" territory, sobrang nababad-trip talaga ko sa mga sinasabi dun. Nahurt din ako whenever I see pictures of ZaiZai being blocked by credits. I mean, what's up with newspaper scans na pinapatungan ang mukha ni ZaiZai??? (Edit: May nakita na naman ako now! Ano ba??) And everything just kept on piling up to the point that I was ultra-sensitive when it comes to negative comments about ZaiZai coming from Jerry fans.
That's why I interpreted so many things from a friend's LJ entry about Silence. At first, akala ko nga I was just being sensitive or being mababaw but I wasn't alone with my kind of sentiments. So that explains my entry a few days ago... Words can really be taken in so many ways and I guess, for our part, we unfairly interpreted them in the light of the negativities being thrown against ZaiZai by the other fans. That being said, I do apologize for my harsh words and for the misunderstanding.
Thinking about what happened, it doesn't really matter if Jerry is my F2, F3 or F4, or a Jerry fan considers ZaiZai as her least favorite. As long as we respect each other's preferences (may it be within or outside F4), then we can avoid disagreements and misunderstandings.
As a last note, I don't feel proud that I allowed myself to be affected by the animosity between ZaiZai and Jerry fans. I used to think that I was way above those feuds. But since I invested so many emotions already sa kanila, those kind of reactions cannot be helped. I guess my only defense is the friendship that I have established with my fellow F4 friends (ZZistahs, Yan-Yans, KENetics, kWUlasisis). ^_^
Everything started way back before the concert last March. I was chatting with overseas JMs and they told me stories... stories that I wish I was never told because I love F4, as in each and every one of them. My F2 may change depending on who is the most visible but nevertheless, I love the 4 of them... However, I was chatting with them on an almost-daily basis and I guess everyone's feeling the pressure. If you think F4 lang ang napressure sa concerts last March, think again... It was actually quite common to see the nasty backstabbing among different fan groups in order to promote their F1s...
I then watched the HK concerts surrounded by such mindset. And I cried during the third night of the concert when Jerry carried ZaiZai at the end of the show because I felt so overwhelmed. I keep on mentioning this pero it's true, sobra kong napressure sa mga tickets namin. And seeing the 4 of them having so much fun in the stage just truly overwhelmed me. I felt that everything I had experienced in preparing for the concerts was soo worth it. Moreover, I felt guilty because for a time, I was like one of those people who dislike ZaiZai because of his fans. For me, it never came to a point that I disliked Jerry. It was more like he was my least favorite among the 4 because of his fans...
After the concert, I used to visit a Jerry-forum because I was looking for DLs for my sister. And since ang hilig ko talaga magbasa even if I was aware that I am in an "enemy" territory, sobrang nababad-trip talaga ko sa mga sinasabi dun. Nahurt din ako whenever I see pictures of ZaiZai being blocked by credits. I mean, what's up with newspaper scans na pinapatungan ang mukha ni ZaiZai??? (Edit: May nakita na naman ako now! Ano ba??) And everything just kept on piling up to the point that I was ultra-sensitive when it comes to negative comments about ZaiZai coming from Jerry fans.
That's why I interpreted so many things from a friend's LJ entry about Silence. At first, akala ko nga I was just being sensitive or being mababaw but I wasn't alone with my kind of sentiments. So that explains my entry a few days ago... Words can really be taken in so many ways and I guess, for our part, we unfairly interpreted them in the light of the negativities being thrown against ZaiZai by the other fans. That being said, I do apologize for my harsh words and for the misunderstanding.
Thinking about what happened, it doesn't really matter if Jerry is my F2, F3 or F4, or a Jerry fan considers ZaiZai as her least favorite. As long as we respect each other's preferences (may it be within or outside F4), then we can avoid disagreements and misunderstandings.
As a last note, I don't feel proud that I allowed myself to be affected by the animosity between ZaiZai and Jerry fans. I used to think that I was way above those feuds. But since I invested so many emotions already sa kanila, those kind of reactions cannot be helped. I guess my only defense is the friendship that I have established with my fellow F4 friends (ZZistahs, Yan-Yans, KENetics, kWUlasisis). ^_^
