(no subject)

[myonlyheart0]

hi..yah it's 7:34 and im up so what//yah cant sleep have alot on my mind.mostly about how stupid i am. didnt have a goodo night last night at all .. and last night made me realize a whole lot of stuff that i didnt really see before. i never knew my feelings could be this strong for someone ever again . but yah it happend and i have no control over it . and it hurts to know someone doesnt think that i feel that way about them, when i really really do.. awhole lot. and im stupid enough to act in a way that i usualy dont act just cuiz. im stupid. and now the one person i actually care so much about probably wants me like gone foreverr. it sucks when you want something so bad, and it can't and wont happen. and the way i act upon it is, i try to act like i don't care, when something is bothering me.last night... stuff was bothering me so bad..of course i had to act like i didn't care at all, but reallyy i was so upset about it. i dont like to show people that im upset cuz then their all like ohhh are u ok blah blah.. but i guess i finally showd it at the end of the night cuz i really couldnt take it anymore..i have so many thoughts in my head.. im so confused. and ya NO i dont have feelings for anyone esle. there is only one thing that can make me happy. and from now on im not going to act the way i do, its not me, and i dont like it. ok and one last thing.. im stupid. bye

this is where i say ive had enough
noone should ever feel the way that i do now.
a walking open wound, a choking display of bruises
and i dont think that im getting any better
im sitting here with hopes the phone will ring
and im thinking awful things
pretty sure a few would notice

I dont believe that anybody feels the way i do about you now.

i'm sorry...