...memory humming at the heart of a factory town...
....all my life, I've been working them angels overtime...
I gotta learn how to say "no" - I'm terrible at it. I like to help people - hence becoming a reference librarian - but I don't know when to stop. I'm like my mom in that respect...we both have "SUCKER" tattooed on our foreheads in ink only others can see. :P We'll help just about anybody who asks us to help, as long as it's reasonable (and even sometimes when it isn't). I was good about it in the months after my fibro diagnosis...now I've relapsed, so to speak.
But you know? It's not just about helping people. It's two other things: wanting to be reliable for people I care about, and wanting to make sure they get the help they need and want.
...if you ever would be mine, I would never ever let you down...
I don't like breaking promises, so I've gotten to where I don't make them. I hate letting people down. I hate causing disappointment. See? Sometimes it's better to stay alone, in solitude, then nobody gets let down or hurt, and I don't spend days beating myself up about it.
Right now I'm wishing I hadn't said a particular set of yeses because I'm stressed out all of a sudden because all these requests (and the subsequent yeses) have come at the 11th hour. I know I'll make it through, and with flying colors no less...I just hate the stress feeling, the herding cats feeling, the OMG THIS HAS TO WORK, IT HAS TO BE PERFECT feeling.
Gotta get a grip. Project Friday will be done by 3pm tomorrow afternoon. Everything else has reasonable deadlines, actually - I just worry about deadlines like crazy. *DEEP BREATH*
Dinner with friends tonight. Pub food. Good times. The mind will find its ease.
I gotta learn how to say "no" - I'm terrible at it. I like to help people - hence becoming a reference librarian - but I don't know when to stop. I'm like my mom in that respect...we both have "SUCKER" tattooed on our foreheads in ink only others can see. :P We'll help just about anybody who asks us to help, as long as it's reasonable (and even sometimes when it isn't). I was good about it in the months after my fibro diagnosis...now I've relapsed, so to speak.
But you know? It's not just about helping people. It's two other things: wanting to be reliable for people I care about, and wanting to make sure they get the help they need and want.
...if you ever would be mine, I would never ever let you down...
I don't like breaking promises, so I've gotten to where I don't make them. I hate letting people down. I hate causing disappointment. See? Sometimes it's better to stay alone, in solitude, then nobody gets let down or hurt, and I don't spend days beating myself up about it.
Right now I'm wishing I hadn't said a particular set of yeses because I'm stressed out all of a sudden because all these requests (and the subsequent yeses) have come at the 11th hour. I know I'll make it through, and with flying colors no less...I just hate the stress feeling, the herding cats feeling, the OMG THIS HAS TO WORK, IT HAS TO BE PERFECT feeling.
Gotta get a grip. Project Friday will be done by 3pm tomorrow afternoon. Everything else has reasonable deadlines, actually - I just worry about deadlines like crazy. *DEEP BREATH*
Dinner with friends tonight. Pub food. Good times. The mind will find its ease.