Welcome Back, Mr McDonald!

[myjulien]

AU Fic: Merboys (5/5)
Pairings: Sho/Aiba, Nino/Aiba
Rating: PG
Word Count: 2,553 / 8,346 (I write in Pages though, and it seems to count a lot of unnecessary things)
Aiba is a curious merboy. And yes, he strikes a faustian bargain to meet a human prince on land.
The final part, for joyeuxnoel and ph-otometry who both donated generously to the arashi_on fundraiser. I still owe

Comments

[miyawoks]

Haha just a segueway, but I'm a little embarrassed about all the typos I made in my last post... I was typing away like some possessed person and didn't really re-read what I wrote...

Anyhoo.... don't apologize for the depression that is your story... I guess that's the charm of your writing... depressing does not really equate to something negative (in terms of the contents of the story), it's just that I'm the type of (fan)fic reader who likes to read about rainbows and unicorns and all things sunny and bright (basically, the "Aiba Dazzle") when it comes to my OTP/s (Yes, I am a Sakuraiba fan with hints of Aimiya in my closet... anything Aiba for me is <3), so an ending with no OTP's happily ever after is a sad case for me :P

Can I be a bit (constructively) critical though? (Am sorry, I read your whole fic AGAIN AFTER I've already posted my comments) There are some unfinished details in your story... like why does Sho know Aiba's name, and who does Aiba remind Sho of... and some other things... I apologize for pointing these out... it's just that it makes me more curious about the finer details in your story... In short, I seriously want to read more of your works!!!! Please, please!!! And can I request something which does not involve me withering on the ground because of sheer exhaustion from crying my eyes out? Pretty please? :)

[myjulien]

Aw, I like when people forget themselves and type away like possessed persons in their comments on fic!

I have a penchant for Aiba as well, as I'm sure you've noticed so finding a kindred soul is yay! :)

Sure, thanks for the concrit, I always appreciate it! And yeah actually you hit it bang on; it sticks in my craw but I actually... have no idea. I couldn't go back and change it after all that and I think that in the beginning I actually had a plan but because I don't really write down notes, by the time I completed the fic I had totally forgotten what my intentions were.

There was even something else I wanted to write in that I only just belatedly remembered yesterday as well ha. So the Sho/Masaki backstory is still up in the air and I think it weakens the story a lot. I was actually expecting someone to bring that up anytime.

If I ever remember or figure it out I'll definitely write some scenes to fit it all together

What other unfinished/finer details are you curious about for this story, if you still remember and don't mind me asking? I think I need to go back and read this with a fine-toothed comb in hand and anything at all would help! I can be a bit unconscious of/unconcerned with sometimes!

I'm so flattered that you want to read more of my writing! I have a lot of fundraiser fic I owe people! They've been really patient too.

You've really made my day- I'm so happy that my story is rereadable to you!