I dreamed a dream
Have you ever had one of those nightmares that feels so real you can't go back to bed afterward? My dream was so terrible. It was so real, so tangible in the depth of the sadness. I woke up in my dark room, realized where I was. I rolled onto my side, closed my eyes, and a flood of sorrow so strangling washed over me that i lost it. I came upstairs and sat in the bathroom, sobbing, until I could force myself to be calm enough to pray.
Even now, thinking about it almost four hours later makes me anxious and just...my throat gets all tight and I just want to cry. I haven't had a nightmare like that in a long, long time. I'm prone to spells of time where nightmares are all I have. But this? This was so different. It was so personal, and it...
Honestly, it felt like a violation to my psyche. I'm glad that, after I was calm enough to focus, almost as soon as I started praying a calm fell over me. I was able to breathe closer to normal, I could concentrate on what was real, and acknowledge my feelings as being linked to something that did not happen. It's those times that Jesus is very real, and very tangible for me. I can see him holding my hand, talking me down.
Something tells me this dream was a direct threat (and you can think I'm crazy. I couldn't care less) because Chuck and Paula are coming over tonight to pray with us over this house.
Opposition always come before the greatest victories. I've seen that too many times in my life to believe otherwise. I'm winning this one, just as I've won the others. You can bet on it.
Even now, thinking about it almost four hours later makes me anxious and just...my throat gets all tight and I just want to cry. I haven't had a nightmare like that in a long, long time. I'm prone to spells of time where nightmares are all I have. But this? This was so different. It was so personal, and it...
Honestly, it felt like a violation to my psyche. I'm glad that, after I was calm enough to focus, almost as soon as I started praying a calm fell over me. I was able to breathe closer to normal, I could concentrate on what was real, and acknowledge my feelings as being linked to something that did not happen. It's those times that Jesus is very real, and very tangible for me. I can see him holding my hand, talking me down.
Something tells me this dream was a direct threat (and you can think I'm crazy. I couldn't care less) because Chuck and Paula are coming over tonight to pray with us over this house.
Opposition always come before the greatest victories. I've seen that too many times in my life to believe otherwise. I'm winning this one, just as I've won the others. You can bet on it.