The Wonderful Life of Me

Mar 20, 2005 23:29

Alright, well Friday was fun. The guys and i played wall ball at Deerwood, and then went to a party for a bit but i couldnt sneak out of my house to go back to the party. Saturday i wrote songs with my brother for After Its Over but i dont think anyone really cares, at least i do.
Today started off ok, Me, Randy, Francesco, Niglet, and James went to the beach and came back and watched movies. Yeah so i was having a good do but apparently i was wrong, because i just cant say anything right ever and im an idiot, i always spoil the fun, im a whinner and im a shallow lil bitch whod fuck anything with boobs and a vagina. Well i dont know how to respond to that so if you think that then you can suck my dick bitches because haha i dont need that shit in my life assholes. I really dont have time in my life to take fucking ridicule from assholes trying to ruin my day, because i really dont deserve this. You might even realize that you say it or it offends me because you probably dont care and your just an heartless bitch or asshole. Some of it my be playing around, but sometimes it just gets to far and i dont know someone else telling me to not be a bitch after that. Yeah there are times that people i care about do good things for me and im totally greatful for that and i try to give back but then some how by someone or the same person something gets fucked up. Ive never fucked over any of my friends yet i get shit upon, im always kind to people that i care about and im not an asshole. To you who think i am an asshole you dont have room to talk. I feel like the people "closest to me" are oblivious to whats going on in my life because i dont really feel like they care because recently everyone are just assholes basically. I put "closest to me" in quotes because recently i dont think anyone really knows me because they just asume that id do stupid shit just because im hyper. Well thats my outer side. So im typing this in my live journal to let you all know how i truely feel right now because if i said it im person id probably be told to get over it, but this way i can say what i want to say because its my journal. And if your reading this, actually read what im saying and not put it into your own words becuase that happends alot. I might be just venting or ranting on or not, but who really cares, im saying what i wanna say right now and i feel like its safer for me to say it on here for my sake and others sake. Im not "hiding" behind a computer screen in the sense that i cant say this shit to someones face, im "hiding" because if i said this to someones face theyd brush it off, probably that might be what your doing right now. Anyways, im not mentioning names because if i did theyd be like "what the fuck man, why'd you have to put my name on there" so just shut up. Some of you might be saying to your self "wow hes being a real asshole right now", well as a matter of fact im just really pissed off and fed up and if this is the only way itll get to anyone then so be it. If you arent one of these people then just take it into consideration. I hope if you have at least a good part in you, that youd actually thik for awhile "wow, why is he upset" "maybe i did do something wrong" "can i fix it" because that would be a miracle if any of you could think that for once instead of me always doing that. Thank you.
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