I wasn’t complaining on how much college costs, I was commenting ( yes, in eryca land there is a slight difference) I know I could go to smc, and I could go to Harvard. But I have no interest in either and if I was intending to go to Harvard (or an other in-league school) I would have decided it by now. It’s not fully a comment about the cost, although I did mention it. Its more of a comment on the fat that our culture accept far more if you have a big fat expensive degree from Harvard, than a cheaper degree from a university no one has ever heard of with a 90% acceptance rate, or JUST going to smc, and not transferring (although I’m not sure they would let you, but really I have no fucking idea, so don’t take my word for it) at this point I am not complaining that I will probably only be able to go to smc, but that if I do people will be saying “it's not that bad! You’ll transfer into a great UC school in a couple years!!!” like they are trying to make me feel better. But if I had all A+’s in EVERYTHING and decided I didn’t want to go to college people would be like “that’s nice, maybe she is taking a year or two off” not “OH MY GOSH SHE IS THROWING HER LIFE AWAY” which is what EVERYONE would say if I decide not to go to community college (or a university) if/when I graduate from high school. What I was saying basically is that soo much is judged on grades and degree’s, most likely I could not be a journalist if I didn’t get a journalism major, unless of course I was an amazing writer and just blew everyone away with my magnificent writing that they would over look the fact I didn’t have a degree, in anything. But, I’m not counting on that.
What I was saying in that last quote was well, you know that person we ALWAYS make fun of for being so pretentious and cocky, well I was using him as an example, but I didn’t want to be a bitch by saying his name/ start anything online if he somehow saw it, but basically because he is so pretentious and ACTS like he knows everything and ACTS like he is really smart, but he basically has no self confidence, ya know? That’s why (most) cocky people are cocky, even though they come off as having SOOO much self confidence they really don’t because they feel the only way they will have self confidence is to pretend they have more than other people, that’s one of the MANY ways people deal with have low self-confidence. And I am going to be very honest here, and if anyone (besides Samantha) wants to use it against me in an argument feel free, I’ll fight you till the death and I’ll win, anyways I wear make-up because I am do not have enough self confidence to go out of my house without make-up on, and yeah that is how I deal with my lack of self confidence, I know, in other peoples eyes I look better and more real without make-up . and, btw, about all the factual stuff I said is not from my head I’m not making this stuff up there are books and books and books you could read about what people do when they have REALLY LOW self confidence, it is studied, I’m just re-writing in ways I speak, what I read, so I’m not trying to sound cocky or pretentious by saying “I am sooo deep that I can tell” That is NOT what I’m doing, so yeah. And you, have WAY more self-confidence than most people, and most of the people I associate with do too.
I am not (trying) to be cynical. I’m just being honest about my perception of the world, and if it’s cynical than so be it. And I do try and focus on the things I like, but when the things I am socially (as in out societal, not friends) forced to do cut into my “fun time” or literally cut OUT my “fun time” (which is what its doing right now) pisses me the fuck off( yeah you could make the point I was wasting my time complaining in stead of doing, but the few hours I had free today, I did not have the energy or mindset to be writing or laying out my zine.
And I don’t want to wait 2 and a half more years for me to do what I want, I don’t. and refuse to. I will not sit back and let evil manipulating cronies control what I do, ever
<3 ERYCA that took soooooooooooo f-ing long to write let me tell you, but it was worth it
ooh note to everyone else reading this, DON"T hit the reply to, at either one of the sections of my response, b/c then it will get fucked up, i separted it into 3 comments because it was took long for 1 comment and then the same for two comments
What I was saying in that last quote was well, you know that person we ALWAYS make fun of for being so pretentious and cocky, well I was using him as an example, but I didn’t want to be a bitch by saying his name/ start anything online if he somehow saw it, but basically because he is so pretentious and ACTS like he knows everything and ACTS like he is really smart, but he basically has no self confidence, ya know? That’s why (most) cocky people are cocky, even though they come off as having SOOO much self confidence they really don’t because they feel the only way they will have self confidence is to pretend they have more than other people, that’s one of the MANY ways people deal with have low self-confidence. And I am going to be very honest here, and if anyone (besides Samantha) wants to use it against me in an argument feel free, I’ll fight you till the death and I’ll win, anyways I wear make-up because I am do not have enough self confidence to go out of my house without make-up on, and yeah that is how I deal with my lack of self confidence, I know, in other peoples eyes I look better and more real without make-up . and, btw, about all the factual stuff I said is not from my head I’m not making this stuff up there are books and books and books you could read about what people do when they have REALLY LOW self confidence, it is studied, I’m just re-writing in ways I speak, what I read, so I’m not trying to sound cocky or pretentious by saying “I am sooo deep that I can tell” That is NOT what I’m doing, so yeah.
And you, have WAY more self-confidence than most people, and most of the people I associate with do too.
I am not (trying) to be cynical. I’m just being honest about my perception of the world, and if it’s cynical than so be it.
And I do try and focus on the things I like, but when the things I am socially (as in out societal, not friends) forced to do cut into my “fun time” or literally cut OUT my “fun time” (which is what its doing right now) pisses me the fuck off( yeah you could make the point I was wasting my time complaining in stead of doing, but the few hours I had free today, I did not have the energy or mindset to be writing or laying out my zine.
And I don’t want to wait 2 and a half more years for me to do what I want, I don’t. and refuse to. I will not sit back and let evil manipulating cronies control what I do, ever
<3 ERYCA
that took soooooooooooo f-ing long to write let me tell you, but it was worth it
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ERYCAAAAAAAAAAAAAa
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