(no subject)
I was on my way to the train after class. I put on my headphones, stomped to the train station on Broadway and 8th street, and restarted the song that I had had on repeat before class. Capital G by NIN. It's a good walking through throngs of people song. Anyway, I'm getting very into the song, because it's about George Bush's abysmal failure. The chorus goes like this:
Well I use to stand for something
But forgot what that could be
There's a lot of me inside you
Maybe you're afraid to see
Well I use to stand for something
Now I'm on my hands and knees
Trading in my god for this one
and he signs his name with a capital G
You get the point. Trent has never really been one for elegant lyrics, but I've been very much into the album THE LIMITLESS POTENTIAL because Trent released some tracks with Creative Commons licenses, thereby allowing fans to remix his songs legally, and he had a contest where fans could submit their remixed NIN tracks to be made into an album. It's a fabulous idea. ANYWAY:
I walk down the stairs, being careful not to slip on the exposed staircase. I start my thumping again to the turnstile. Trent is saying AND HE SIGNS HIS NAME WITH A CAPITAL G, and at the FUCKING second he says capital G, I lift my eyes to the turnstile. On the other side of the turnstile, a man in black pants, black shoes and grey button down is standing with his back to me. Exactly parallel to me. And in the back of his head, shaved into his crew cut, is a fucking CAPITAL G.
So, normally, I smile at these types of things. When a guy at a bakery gave me a pumpkin muffin when I had asked for a blueberry one, although I had misspoken and actually had wanted the pumpkin muffin, I felt like things had aligned. Like things were fun and happy. But when I saw that man with the G shaved into the back of his head, I got scared. I walked away from him and stopped mid stride. I thought "I have to talk to him right?" and I walked back. I looked at him. He was an average looking man and he saw me looking at him and starting looking at me. I walked past him the other way. I started getting anxious. "What the fuck!?" I mean...this wasn't a reference, this wasn't a t-shirt that said G-UNIT or something on it. It was simply a capital G shaved into the back of his head. I thought "Maybe something will happen if I talk to him. Maybe I shouldn't talk to him." I started getting really paranoid.
I got on the train and he did too. He kept looking at me. I started making a very detailed to-do list and when I was done he was off the train. I don't know what it was about this particular instance that really weirded me out. I felt exposed. Like my interiority didn't belong to me. It was absolutely, incredibly unnerving.
Well I use to stand for something
But forgot what that could be
There's a lot of me inside you
Maybe you're afraid to see
Well I use to stand for something
Now I'm on my hands and knees
Trading in my god for this one
and he signs his name with a capital G
You get the point. Trent has never really been one for elegant lyrics, but I've been very much into the album THE LIMITLESS POTENTIAL because Trent released some tracks with Creative Commons licenses, thereby allowing fans to remix his songs legally, and he had a contest where fans could submit their remixed NIN tracks to be made into an album. It's a fabulous idea. ANYWAY:
I walk down the stairs, being careful not to slip on the exposed staircase. I start my thumping again to the turnstile. Trent is saying AND HE SIGNS HIS NAME WITH A CAPITAL G, and at the FUCKING second he says capital G, I lift my eyes to the turnstile. On the other side of the turnstile, a man in black pants, black shoes and grey button down is standing with his back to me. Exactly parallel to me. And in the back of his head, shaved into his crew cut, is a fucking CAPITAL G.
So, normally, I smile at these types of things. When a guy at a bakery gave me a pumpkin muffin when I had asked for a blueberry one, although I had misspoken and actually had wanted the pumpkin muffin, I felt like things had aligned. Like things were fun and happy. But when I saw that man with the G shaved into the back of his head, I got scared. I walked away from him and stopped mid stride. I thought "I have to talk to him right?" and I walked back. I looked at him. He was an average looking man and he saw me looking at him and starting looking at me. I walked past him the other way. I started getting anxious. "What the fuck!?" I mean...this wasn't a reference, this wasn't a t-shirt that said G-UNIT or something on it. It was simply a capital G shaved into the back of his head. I thought "Maybe something will happen if I talk to him. Maybe I shouldn't talk to him." I started getting really paranoid.
I got on the train and he did too. He kept looking at me. I started making a very detailed to-do list and when I was done he was off the train. I don't know what it was about this particular instance that really weirded me out. I felt exposed. Like my interiority didn't belong to me. It was absolutely, incredibly unnerving.