I've decided that since I haven't updated in a long time, I would create a Damonian collage rather than rehash the depressing ingredients of my life. Excited? No? Deal!
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The first part comes from a quote that I found hysterical in D-I-Y magazine, ReadyMade. They're doing a contest to see who can build the most useful/interesting item from old artificial Christmas trees, when they add this caveat:
"Now, lest you fear that this magazine is getting all denominational on you, breathe easy: The origins of the ceremonial pine go back to before JC hit the scene, and they have a distinctly pagan pedigree (sexy!)."
I almost peed myself reading the paranthetical.
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I visited Bethany in Marshall, on the sixth for her sister's wedding. It was a lovely ceremony, and I got pictures of Bethany's grandmother dancing to rap music. However, I did get Bethany to watch Elimidate and we did find the best retort:
Drunk Slut #1: (to male date) Hey, if you want to be with some girl who's been around the block so much that--
Drunk Slut #2: (proud) Hey, I've been nowhere!!!
Ooh! Boo her!
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Last night, Jason and I enjoyed watching Elizabeth Taylor, Richard Burton and George Segal get trashed and verbally abusive in 1966's Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?. What a pleasant romp! And by "pleasant," I mean, "awkward and morbidly depressing." But it's very good, and fantastically acted. However, my favorite line? When Elizabeth Taylor is accused of smothering her and Burton's son, she retorts:
"I never cornered the son of a bitch!"
Ya see, it's funny because she's his mother.
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Finally, I got another rejection, this time from the syndicate that brought you Calvin and Hobbes and The Far Side, Universal Press. Sigh... They sent me a terse form letter. Jason's livid, because he had said earlier while reading this comics: "If Universal Press Syndicate rejects you, I'm going to have to kill all of them!!!" Then he turned the paper around and it's Close to Home (not this specific one, but this is for an idea).
See what he's doing there? He's taking a beloved character and he's "updating" it in a way, by making Rudolph use the internet service MapQuest! Wow! What an interesting take. Sigh...God, I hate Close to Home!!!!
I'm also thinking of trying to whore out my talents to inordinate amount of queer papers we have in Nashville. Surely they wouldn't mind having a young, fresh-faced, talented, naive-but-game cartoonist on their payroll. Right? Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight???
~"Could I be so Out of Touch? No, It's the [Syndicates] Who are Wrong" Damon