(no subject)
It’s nine in the morning and I really don’t know what to do. I called my dad earlier to let him know that him know that I’m back from my moms and he sounded disappointed, upset, just generally not in a good mood. I hope it’s nothing involving me, or what partook in my room before I went to my mom’s. Sean, she questioned me about it not even 10 minutes into the ride. IF it is, I will either need to pull off a huge convincing apology, or start looking for a place to stay. Either way, I need a job, I have too much time, and the time I use, I waste, which in turn causes me to waste more time (in a cosmic way that needs greater explanation but am lacking the whatever the hell you call it to do it ). Something happened that I was almost sure never would, Alex IM’ed me apologizing for alla the shyt that happened between us and we talked until almost 3am. I had a hard time talking to him, but it was mostly because this is the first time I’ve talked to him in almost a year. Otherwise, the weirdness was because of the usual social “discrepancies” that I’ve been experiencing for a while. Nonetheless, it makes me feel amazing that we are talking again, something’s been happening and it’s creeping upon us all, slow at first but at ever increasing speed. Lately I started seeing old friends again, and Alex was the climax of that. I’m starting to come out of the rut of ever-boredom that I was in, and things are starting to look brighter. I’ve come to terms with the fact that I have an expression problem, and have taken note that it’s taken root in many aspects of my life, from communication to art, and most everything in between.