(no subject)
wow, so the first person to be so close to me has passed away, and i feel horrible. he died today and i feel iike shit. ever since i found out i cant stop crying, i just already miss him i talked to him a few weeks ago, and i never even properly said goodbye, and im not ready to say goodbye. i just cant believe it, why do horrible things happen to me? why do i have to cry about this, why did he have to die? my mom is flying out on saturday in time for the funeral, i want to be there, i want to say goodbye to him and tell him how much i love him and how much he meant and continue to mean to me. I'm not ready to say goodbye. im so taken aback, i can't stand it, why is life so unfair?