The White Raven (fanficiton)
Chapter Four: Learning to Play the Game
Andriana had been gone too long. Lila knew how long it took to get to the mountain pass and at the speed Andy had been going… Lila swallowed. She didn’t want to think about the myriad of possibilities that leapt so willingly to her mind. Instead, she pressed those thoughts down and imagined that Andriana was having a spirited argument with her mother over the situation, so enthusiastic an argument that she had been gone for over a half… an… hour. Andriana was riled up enough that Lila could almost believe it. Almost.
Lila resorted to pacing the tavern slowly, with a plodding, somber rhythm to her step. If she indulged her darker thoughts, she was worried. But since she didn’t indulge herself - ever - she told herself that she wasn’t worried. Andriana was a big girl. She could take care of herself.
But…what if she couldn’t? Lila couldn’t fight the reality that Andriana was only a young woman, with minimal training and fighting skills (although that was more than could be said for most of the village girls), who stood no chance against even one, unarmed attacker. Even if the Raven only sent a few scouts, if they were skilled enough to get through to the mountain pass unnoticed, and catch Andriana and the others unawares…
“No, stop thinking like that,” Lila commanded herself. It was doing her no good, fretting like this. If she wanted to do anything about her worry, she knew she should just go out there and find Andriana, and that was that. Almost immediately, she worried what might become of her, were she to be as impulsive as Andriana had been. What good was she doing putting herself in danger, too?
“She’s your friend,” her conscience reproached, outraged at her reluctance. Lila swallowed a mix of shame and fear. She and Andriana might have never been the closest of friends, but… Lila hadn’t really had many friends otherwise. She was so angry, so hard, it had been very difficult to make friends with the other, quiet village girls. Besides Andy, she didn’t even have any other female friends - when she wasn’t working in the fields, she was usually in the company of her two brothers and their friends, all of whom were boys. Andriana had been the only girl who’d been able to put up with her stoic nature, enough for Lila to consider her a valued friend. So what if Andriana had simply been so oblivious to Lila’s objections to their friendship that she’d managed to wear Lila down? She was still her friend. Andriana deserved at least as much as this in payment for all those years of not just tolerance, but of kindness.
Burgeoned by these thoughts, Lila marched confidently toward the door, and was just about to open it when the sudden sound of voices outside caused her to freeze in her tracks, hand still extended towards the door handle, her fingertips a mere breath away from the cold metal. With her breath dead in her lungs, and her heart pounding in her chest, Lila slid against the wall, beneath one of the small windows, and listened as though her life depended on it.
“My, my…”
Lila shook to her core, the icy voice like the sound of death itself. She barely heard what else the cold voice uttered - her mind was reeling for what to do. She knew who it had been, and understood the danger she was in, but she couldn’t run (they’d hear her), she couldn’t hide (where would she hide?) and she couldn’t fight, could she? Her eyes swept the room, for something, anything, a possibility, when her gaze fell on the soapy bin of plates, mugs, and knives…
Lila eased her way as calmly as she could to the bar and formed a plan.
*
Andriana felt like she’d been walking for hours. In reality, she knew, it had only been a few short minutes, but since all reason seemed to be falling away from the world, she wasn’t too disturbed by the relativity of it all. She was more concerned with the sharp dagger being pressed against her back by a psycho-murderer demigod.
“Are we close, or are you walking me all the way back to the East, Andri-ah-na?”
The Raven’s voice, so velvety smooth, yet so smoky and rough, had sounded beautiful and seductive the first time Andriana had heard it, only minutes ago. It had very quickly become the most horrible sound she had ever heard, and to hear the Raven pronounce her name was to hear the sounds of the depths of Hades, torturous and insistent in her ears. The way she lingered on “ah” was grating on Andriana’s patience and slowly eating away at her fear, replacing it with annoyance and mounting anger. The few moves she knew well from her father’s training were revolving in her head, and every time the Raven drug her name along the dirt path, Andriana came closer and closer to actually trying one of them.
And every time the Raven shoved her forward, she was pushing her luck. Andriana didn’t care how deadly she was, Andy knew she could get in at least one good blow before the Raven could kill her, and at that point, one good blow was looking as tempting as a glass of water to a man dying of thirst.
The Raven finally pushed Andriana so hard that she couldn’t regain her balance, and she fell brutally onto the dirty, gravely path. Andy hissed through her teeth as tiny stones tore at her knees and the palms of her hands. She winced at the twinge of pain as her wrists tried to absorb the shock of her fall. Her hair swept the ground, lifting a cloud of dust that filled her lungs and made her cough and sputter.
“Oh get up,” the Raven sighed exasperatedly, and Andriana heard her footsteps approaching. From this position, she was weak, but if the Raven wasn’t expecting -
Andriana spun toward the Raven, her right fist swinging for the cold white face, when a blur of motion ended in Andriana falling to her back, her offending wrist clenched in the fierce, painful grip of the Raven. Her thin, fragile looking fingers dug into Andy with ferocious strength and her eyes, bright as hot ice, seemed to multiply the pain with their madness. Andriana trembled, and though the Raven stood over her, it felt to Andriana like the full force of the Raven’s body pressed down on her.
“Don’t ever try that again,” the Raven said, her face looming over Andriana with pure, unadulterated fury as plain as day on her sharp features. Her lips drew a tight, unforgiving line, and Andriana whimpered softly, entirely penitent and fearful. The Raven raised her other hand, seemingly poised to strike Andriana, who reflexively flinched away from her.
But instead of hitting her, the Raven ignored the piteous recoiling and lifted Andriana roughly by the arms from the ground, examining her briefly.
“I won’t have you injuring yourself. I need you intact.” She ignored the look of shock on Andriana’s face, and instead spun her back around, pushing her forward again.
Andy didn’t understand why the Raven needed her anything more than alive, but knew this much: she wasn’t going to ask. Andriana was afraid the Raven would do more than bruise her wrist the next time she was displeased with her. Andriana nursed her right wrist gently, rubbing it slowly and firmly. The Raven’s speed, her strength… it terrified Andriana, but also demanded her awe. She’d never seen anyone move like that - man or woman, or even beast. She hadn’t the slightest idea what to make of it. How could a mortal woman be that strong, that quick? She was rethinking the words of the Raven, telling her that she was “not a god”, but “not a mortal”, either, that she was… something more. Had she been speaking more literally than Andriana had thought?
The entire line of thought was irrelevant at the moment, though, and so she abandoned the unanswerable question for something she could actually theorize on: why was the Raven taking her back into town? Couldn’t she just… take her down to her army, and keep her there? Wasn’t that what one did when they took someone hostage?
But Andriana had never been in a war before, and certainly had never been a hostage, so she accepted that this might make all the sense in the world to the Raven. However, a million things might make sense to a crazed warlord that would never make sense to Andriana, so the thought wasn’t exactly comforting.
As they neared the edge of town and the buildings appearing as hazy, pin-thin blue outlines in the distance, Andriana suddenly realized that, during her self-concerned trek back into town, she had completely ignored one element in the situation:
“Lila.”
Andriana’s footsteps faltered, just enough for the Raven to notice.
“What did you say?”
Her voice was not quite accusatory, more cautious and annoyed, but still dangerous. The Raven practically pretended like she hadn’t even asked the question, pausing behind her to stare up at the cold moon. She clearly hadn’t heard what Andriana had said, but Andy was fairly certain the Raven would see instantly through any lie. But she couldn’t see how she could answer the Raven honestly, without endangering Lila…
“My father,” Andriana improvised, her voice small and frightened, “What… what’s going to happen to him?”
Andriana turned toward her, the tips of her boots scratching through the dirt and gravel. She didn’t dare lift her eyes to meet the Raven’s though, and her long hair curtained most of her face, making her face appear small and serene in the dark halo of black.
The Raven eyed her suspiciously for only a brief moment before apparently accepting the sweet, naïve picture she was presented with. She rolled her eyes and pursed her cold, pink lips firmly. She let out so exaggerated a sigh that Andriana thought it entirely excessive, but she said or showed nothing of her disbelief. If the Raven expected her to act the part of the innocent young village girl in this play, then she would play that part. After a lifetime of rehearsals, she was ready to play this lead.
The Raven shrugged, but her one eyebrow was arched high in annoyance. She didn’t want to endure the child’s concerns, but then she was a cat that never missed a chance to play with the mouse in her paws. “If he does exactly what I ask him to? Then his death will be quick.”
Andriana did not fake the look of shock that flashed suddenly, lighting her dark eyes. The Raven shook her head, but appeared to smile, amused. Well, if at least she was amusing her…
“And if he doesn’t?” she asked, not really wanting to hear the answer. She kept her head down, unwilling to look at the Raven, knowing already the malicious joy easing her lips into a wide smile.
“Then he’ll die even quicker,” she said, sounding terribly amused by Andriana, and stepped toward her. The Raven moved very slowly, mesmerizingly, and Andriana went rigged when the Raven’s right hand came to rest on Andriana’s left elbow. When the Raven pressed Andriana’s arm with the slightest force, a pulse vibrated its way through Andriana’s body, a flush that Andy knew with certainty the Raven had felt. Andriana lifted her eyes a fraction at a time. With each agonizingly slowly passing second, Andriana’s heart rate shot to the quietly watching moon. Suddenly she knew, if she looked even the slightest fraction further up, she would see the Raven’s cold eyes peering at her through the meager protection of her curtain of hair. She couldn’t force herself to look up, and at the same time could not completely look away.
The Raven took the decision away from her. She placed two, thin fingers beneath Andriana’s chin, slowly caressing the soft skin with her fingertips. Andriana shivered. The Raven pushed her thumb against Andy’s chin and lifted her eyes to hers.
Her eyes shot into Andriana, ricocheted inside her, and froze her completely still. Even Andy’s tremors subsided, replaced by absolute stillness. The Raven’s eyes seemed clearer close up, as though they had no color at all, but reflected something inside of her. Her proximity was intoxicating. As she had felt when the Raven had caught her in her fall, Andriana was adrift, feeling heavy, sedated, wholly at the mercy of the invisible force of control flooding her senses as it flowed from the Raven. In her drunken state, Andriana was a malleable doll, her limbs limp as soft, stuffed fabric, head empty but for clouds, and eyes fogged as the glassy orbs that serve for a doll’s sightless vision. A misty, idle voice in her brain asked “How? How does she do this?”, but no answer seemed at hand. She was completely calm, though - she felt perfectly comfortable allowing the Raven’s porcelain face to swim over her while her mind thought of nothing.
The Raven did not have the prerogative to allow her troublingly muddled brain to sink to such depths as Andriana appeared to be allowing herself in indulge in, but she could not refute the haze that was hovering over her thoughts like threatening storm clouds. It had been a long, long time since she’d seen such a girl, she rationalized. It wasn’t anything unique, she assured herself, just something new. It was lust, just pure lust, wanting, something she was very familiar with and knew how to manage. She was letting herself jump to worrisome conclusions, embracing the mystical world of feeling and emotion instead of concentrating on the facts: it had been a while since she’d had the time to exercise her needs and desire. This girl was a perfect example of simple, Western beauty, and she was a woman who appreciated beauty. That’s it, she more commanded herself to think than actually thought.
But was there any harm in dealing with the girl a little differently? It wasn’t as though she was stupid - she knew that some bees were more easily captured with honey. This wasn’t because she wanted to be nice, but because it could be more effective, and she wouldn’t have to rough the pretty little thing up too much.
She regarded, out of the corner of her eye, the soldiers behind her, with the girl’s mother. She would have to be very careful; the troops who spent the most time around her understood her, would know she was playing a game. Some of these men, however, out of necessity, were not her usual, personal group, and might misunderstand her behavior with the young women, were she suddenly to dote on her. And that could breed the infectious thinking that she had some sort of… heart. And those men would think they could get away with more…Couldn’t have that. Gods, she had to think of everything, play by and rearrange the rules with every move she made.
So she’d have to keep playing the game she’d laid the pieces for.
“You simple girl,” the Raven spat, thrusting Andriana away from her again. The girl gasped and shook her head, scrambled to regain her footing as she awoke from her trance. She even dared risk a tiny glance over her shoulder to see how closely the Raven was following. The Raven was keeping her distance, but still Andriana turned sharply away, certainly so as to not have to face those powerful eyes.
“You all think your lives matter so much,” the Raven began, rather loudly, as they made their way into the village’s main road, making certain that her men heard her, “But what you don’t understand is just how insignificant you are.”
She took several incredibly quick steps and seized Andriana’s arm, sweeping her around and to her. Andriana was so startled she cried out, looking at the Raven in terror. The Raven desperately clutched at her fear, using it to fuel herself, to let herself grow angry with the girl. Anger she could control, she could understand, would serve her.
“It’s only those like me that matter, Andriana - the ones with the power.”
The Raven was gripping so hard on her arm that Andriana whimpered, and she looked furtively between her arm and the Raven for several seconds before the Raven finally released her with a grunt of disgust.
“Villagers,” she muttered, watching a cloud of dust swirl at Andriana’s stumbling heels, “They’re so weak.”
Andriana dragged her feet with unbearable reluctance, coming closer and closer to the tavern. She came to a slow, somber halt outside the door.
Her eyes stripped the wood for a way out, some way to warn Lila, but she found only the dull bronze door handle, lit by ominous blue moonlight.
“My, my,” the Raven sang, her gravelly footsteps approaching with maddening slowness. “So this is my home for the next few weeks.”
Andriana thought there was something informative in this, but the appearance of the Raven’s right boot out of the corner of her vision was enough to make her shake with escalating panic and forget her train of thought all together. She could come up with nothing - she couldn’t attack her; that was futile. She couldn’t warn Lila without the Raven figuring it out. And there was no way she was keeping the Raven out - it would only be a delay of the inevitable, even if she did manage to distract her.
The Raven’s hand approached the handle and Andriana sent out a fervent prayer to the gods, preparing herself for the worst.
It happened so slowly, to Andriana, almost in slow motion, though she knew, logically, it occurred in only a few short seconds. She watched as the Raven grasped the handle, pulled it toward her, and something, a thought, a premonition from the gods, sprung to Andriana’s mind, and she knew without hesitation that she must act.
Her body fell forward, sliding between the Raven and the door, slamming into the person that emerged from the tavern and knocking them both to the dirt.
The kitchen knife fell from Lila’s hands to the ground with a profound thud.
Andriana took deep, measured breaths to master the slow hammering rhythm of her heartbeat. As time had slowed, so had her blood and her body. She grabbed at a stunned Lila, Andy’s normally warm eyes crying out with warning, violently silencing any protest that had leapt to Lila’s chest.
From above them, the Raven looked on in shocked fascination and disbelief.
“Interesting,” she murmured to herself, her mind working over the incomprehensible. She stared with calm anger at the entangled bodies and fabric as the two shifted cautiously. The Raven descended with swift, hard motion, and heaved Lila to her feet by the fabric covering her chest.
“I’ll say this: Your village makes brave women,” she observed, her breath hot and harsh on Lila’s face, “Brave, but so foolish.” Her grip tightened painfully and Lila’s green eyes widened with terror. “Perhaps I need to make an example of this one,” she mused.
Andriana, looking on in mounting alarm, felt her heart cease beating when that phantom dagger appeared at Lila’s throat. She vaguely heard her mother cry out in protest behind her, and the rough sound of her being silenced, but Andriana’s own voice hid from her. A glint of silver blade pierced her eyes, filling them with fearful tears, and the Raven gracefully arched her wrist, poising the deadly weapon just under Lila’s strong chin. Her hand lifted lightly, preparing to strike.
“WAIT!”
Sharp, disbelieving eyes fell on Andriana, the Raven’s delicate lips parted in shock. Lila whimpered piteously as the Raven’s grip absently tightened further.
Knowing the Raven’s hesitation would not last, Andriana plunged forward desperately.
“You said you are staying for… weeks, your….your…”
She fumbled for the words, not knowing how to address her, and the Raven raised a white brow in annoyance. She was pressing her luck.
“By all means, take your time,” the Raven said harshly, “Clearly you already know how patient I am.”
She lazily dragged the blade along Lila’s throat, eliciting a tiny eek of pained noises that Lila struggled to contain.
Andriana grabbed her courage in both hands and positively rambled, but got her voice out of her tight mouth.
“My Lord,” she said boldly, and the Raven turned to her with renewed interest. “My…muh my Lord,” she stuttered under the Raven’s gaze, excited at guessing how the Raven would react to the title, “You said you plan on staying for some time - won’t you need women to…tend to you?”
She gestured to the soldiers behind her, feeling braver each second the Raven did not interrupt her.
“Your soldiers cannot care for you - Lila works at the inn,” she lied brazenly, “I’m sure you’ve travelled far, and not had attendants for some time. Lila and I could… care for you…while you are in our town.”
Andriana’s heart smashed against her chest, but she remained outwardly calm under the Raven’s scrutinizing eyes, piercing her, looking for falsehood. She regarded Lila, then, for a moment, twisted and shifting the dagger with consideration on her face, then looked back to Andriana, an ironic lilt in her voice.
“And who says I want two women who attempted to attack me to care for me?”
The reluctance and cruelty in her voice did not deter Andriana - at least she was listening, considering. There was a chance of reasoning with her, even if it had to be on the Raven’s manipulated terms.
“I protected you,” Andriana pointed out nervously, not sure if that was exactly the truth. She had protected Lila, really, stopped her from doing something utterly futile. If (when) she had failed to hurt the Raven, she absolutely would have been killed. Stopping her entirely, Andriana hoped, would lessen the Raven’s anger.
In fact, the Raven seemed to really be considering everything, with some amusement.
“You protected me?” She looked back to Lila’s exposed throat, laying the cool blade gently against her skin. “I supposed you did,” she admitted with a huff of laughter, bright eyes half-lidded as she thought. “Why did you do that, exactly?”
Andriana swallowed around the non-existent answer. She honestly didn’t know how to answer. If she lied, the Raven would see through her, but if she didn’t even know the exact truth…
It seemed, however, that the Raven did not expect an answer to the question - she threw Lila into Andriana’s startled embrace.
“I would have killed your friend before she had so much as thrust the blade,” the Raven said, voice thick with superiority, “But since you were so stupid as to assume you needed to save me to protect her, I’ll assume you’re too stupid to actually be a threat to me.”
She dusted herself off and strode deliberately past into the open door.
Her deceptively gentle-looking hand paused on the doorframe, her face reappearing in the blue light with a hint of impatience and mock surprise on the illuminated features.
“Well?” she said testily. “I take my bath hot.”
She then went inside, leaving stunned Lila and Andriana to blink in confusion and disbelief.
Andriana eventually swallowed and straightened the both of them. They shared a slow, silent exchange, nodding in unspoken agreement. They would do what had to be done, what was asked of them, to get through this. To survive.
Lila went inside, Andriana following after. Andy paused as the Raven had, her hand on the doorframe, looking one last time to the quiet, cool moon. Humbly, her prayers went out to that cool blue sky, that they simply make it to tomorrow.
Andriana took a deep breath and plunged into the dark depths of the tavern.
It was going to be a long, long night.