quotes from the ace man
"Why on Earth would anyone want to help their mom get laid? Just buy her a vibrator and a subscription to cable."
CALLER: My boyfriend masturbates at least once a day, every day. I don't know WHY he's doing that.
ADAM: Uhh, it feels good?
"Wet dreams are just God wacking you off."
"YOU may be laughing, but your vagina is smilin"
"Everyone's got an asshole! Even my grandpa's got an asshole. You gotta go for the vagina and the breasts!"
"Let me define 'open relationship' for all the guys out there: she opens her legs, and you open a porn magazine."
To a female caller who claims that she dreams about having sex with Adam:"Did I go down on you? Because that's how you know you're dreaming."
"My parents never gave me that you-don't-know-how-good-you-have-it crap because they knew I would just laugh."
"Jesus Christ, this guy has slept with five girls, and he's fifteen? I'm gonna kill him. I hate guys like that. When I was fifteen, I was playing with Lincoln Logs and watching Davy and Goliath, crying with my pants around my ankles."
"I love a mirror during sex! I like to look at myself and say, 'hey, look who's getting laid!' Then I hi-five my reflection and break the glass."
ok all i have to say is adam corolla is a fuckin genious!!!!
CALLER: My boyfriend masturbates at least once a day, every day. I don't know WHY he's doing that.
ADAM: Uhh, it feels good?
"Wet dreams are just God wacking you off."
"YOU may be laughing, but your vagina is smilin"
"Everyone's got an asshole! Even my grandpa's got an asshole. You gotta go for the vagina and the breasts!"
"Let me define 'open relationship' for all the guys out there: she opens her legs, and you open a porn magazine."
To a female caller who claims that she dreams about having sex with Adam:"Did I go down on you? Because that's how you know you're dreaming."
"My parents never gave me that you-don't-know-how-good-you-have-it crap because they knew I would just laugh."
"Jesus Christ, this guy has slept with five girls, and he's fifteen? I'm gonna kill him. I hate guys like that. When I was fifteen, I was playing with Lincoln Logs and watching Davy and Goliath, crying with my pants around my ankles."
"I love a mirror during sex! I like to look at myself and say, 'hey, look who's getting laid!' Then I hi-five my reflection and break the glass."
ok all i have to say is adam corolla is a fuckin genious!!!!