"I have her imagine in my mind, and I have to stop."
How Fluid is Gender?
I myself must be careful not to fall into the traps that have been laid out before me. I read that at some point this year, my innate interest in furthering my musical taste will taper off (although I appreciate the fact that this evolutionary took longer to develop full than my physical being and all zones of my brain).
Will I awake one morning (or afternoon, as it were) a crotchety old lady turned off to everything I had not heard of up until ? What if I just hadn't quite gotten around to devouring the latest Queens of the Stone Age or Stokes album - would they linger in a spot of eternal damnation, records which I claim to adore but in secret do not? It would be nearly impossible not to be found out by a trained eye noticing discs with far more scratch marks from, insets of the casings dog-earred from being thumbed through often. Like a child who becomes your favorite just because they were birthed during the time in your life which you were happiest. Maybe this is all about timing.
Could it be possible, then, that gender too is a trap set out for us? Surely the hunters and gatherers weren't constructing his and hers sinks, clad in pink and blue... or wait, was it the other way around?
In a Target recently I couldn't help but overhear (and I say this not from a figurative position) a woman scolding a child she was with over this abstraction.
"You are a boy, you don't play with those toys. I don't know how many times I have to tell you that before you get it through your head!" The child still followed her throughout the aisles, obiendient for know, likely biding time before he gets a set of wheels, a college acceptance letter... a get of of jail free card from the deck.
I wonder if gender is something one can grow into or out of. When children dress up it is either Halloween or play time. When an adult dresses up it is either Halloween or somehow affilitated with their profession. Maybe it's a matter of how short the skirts got or how our stockings transformed to netted neon from nude solids.
But it isn't just a matter of impermanent factors, such as our hairstyles or even ephemeral factors, such as an outfit. The gender concept even seeps into more timeless attributes such as our characteristics and personality traits.
Yikes. Even the description of the non-physical brings about certain deductions. Things are becoming more rigid than I had thought.
Put your bouncing baby boy in a T-shirt with some cuddly kittens, some rainbow colored hearts, or heck - even a unicorn (this is my personal favorite because it is a fictional being) and tally how many passers by will come up to you cooing the words "How old is she?"
This isn't to say things aren't changing in some direction whichever that may be, because, however slowly, they are. The "Male or Female" question is still quite popular on job applications and a variety of other common forms but sometimes there will be an option to mark off indicating of your preference to simply not anwer. Even more rarely will there exist the option to check "Other". Gender non-specific bathrooms are popping up in scarce public locations; it is just taboo to utilize one. Heaven forbid you have ever been in a pickle where you are caring for either the mentally impaired or a child of the opposite sex who cannot go into a public restroom on their own.
Maybe I should be worried about the impacts these topics will have on my personal life, my community or the future. Or is it just another day where I feel more comfortable in the shallow water? As I look around the public transit I am on, I increase the volume of my favorite album and hope my slip isn't showing.