I loved reading your take on this! Thank you for sharing it with us. I completely understand being concerned that it's "not healthy" but in my case one could consider it more healthy then ways I've chosen to cope in the past.
To answer your questions, I've always been one to find things and love the crap out of them almost to the point of obsession. I guess you could call it an obsessive personality. True I do think about them all the time, and draw my loves, but it's never negatively effected my life. I haven't avoided real life things in favor of fake ones, it can be a reminder of what i don't have in life, or what I'll never be, but it keeps me going and that has to be enough.
My hugest of course has been Phantom. I have a tattoo and have been a fan for 15 f'in years. Not as long as some, but it's half my life. I mean, I have liked x-men longer, but it's not an obsession. Sure my Phantom love has been on the back burner for a while, but he'll never leave my heart ever. I just don't function like that. Then there are my boys. Marc and Vincent. Two extremely interesting, versatile, quirky and insanely talented actors. Vincent is at the forefront because he just has more characters I deeply love, namely, Bobby. I love how they have inspired my art and made me want to continue working hard to achieve things. I think this sort of elated feeling I get from them, is no different then religion. I just realize that my obsessions have no power over me. But yes, I just see Vincent and smile.
Now for Orson, god there's another one who blindsided me. Another key aspect of my obsessions is they lead me to other wonderful things. Vincent has shown me a bunch of neat movies, a new author and Orson. Thanks Vincent. Between the films, the books and the man himself, my life has already been enriched in such a small time. He's been an exciting rewarding addition to my love list.
I am not actually afraid that I'll fall into an "unhealthy" trap--it's merely that, left on my own, I could see myself becoming even more single-minded. Then again, left on my own, it wouldn't matter, would it?
I've always been one to find things and love the crap out of them almost to the point of obsession. I guess you could call it an obsessive personality.
This has, typically, been true for me, too. What surprised me was 1) sort of "losing it" for a few years and 2) it coming back again.
My hugest of course has been Phantom.
I think Phantom will always been my first love. It wasn't the "first," but it's attained a status in what I guess you could call my personal mythos that I suspect will make it a permanent part of my life. It's been 15 years for me, too, half my life as well, and my relationship to the story has changed. I'm at a point now where the characters speak to me on different levels, but I'm capable of enjoying all the versions for some facet. I used to be much more phangirly, my love "exclusive" and naturally I was the only right interpreter. But now, I'm just as much in love with the variety of takes on the story and the very fact of its mutability. And every Phantom has something to show me.
I think I also, at times, hold up "idols" for myself when I want someone to look up to and say, "I will achieve."
To answer your questions, I've always been one to find things and love the crap out of them almost to the point of obsession. I guess you could call it an obsessive personality. True I do think about them all the time, and draw my loves, but it's never negatively effected my life. I haven't avoided real life things in favor of fake ones, it can be a reminder of what i don't have in life, or what I'll never be, but it keeps me going and that has to be enough.
My hugest of course has been Phantom. I have a tattoo and have been a fan for 15 f'in years. Not as long as some, but it's half my life. I mean, I have liked x-men longer, but it's not an obsession. Sure my Phantom love has been on the back burner for a while, but he'll never leave my heart ever. I just don't function like that. Then there are my boys. Marc and Vincent. Two extremely interesting, versatile, quirky and insanely talented actors. Vincent is at the forefront because he just has more characters I deeply love, namely, Bobby. I love how they have inspired my art and made me want to continue working hard to achieve things. I think this sort of elated feeling I get from them, is no different then religion. I just realize that my obsessions have no power over me. But yes, I just see Vincent and smile.
Now for Orson, god there's another one who blindsided me. Another key aspect of my obsessions is they lead me to other wonderful things. Vincent has shown me a bunch of neat movies, a new author and Orson. Thanks Vincent. Between the films, the books and the man himself, my life has already been enriched in such a small time. He's been an exciting rewarding addition to my love list.
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I've always been one to find things and love the crap out of them almost to the point of obsession. I guess you could call it an obsessive personality.
This has, typically, been true for me, too. What surprised me was 1) sort of "losing it" for a few years and 2) it coming back again.
My hugest of course has been Phantom.
I think Phantom will always been my first love. It wasn't the "first," but it's attained a status in what I guess you could call my personal mythos that I suspect will make it a permanent part of my life. It's been 15 years for me, too, half my life as well, and my relationship to the story has changed. I'm at a point now where the characters speak to me on different levels, but I'm capable of enjoying all the versions for some facet. I used to be much more phangirly, my love "exclusive" and naturally I was the only right interpreter. But now, I'm just as much in love with the variety of takes on the story and the very fact of its mutability. And every Phantom has something to show me.
I think I also, at times, hold up "idols" for myself when I want someone to look up to and say, "I will achieve."
D'you like my Rochester icon?
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D'you like my Rochester icon?
I very very do.
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