(no subject)
starting 8/19 I work....
thurs fri sat sun mon tues wed thurs fri sat
yea, yea. I know I should "quit my bitchin'" but for someone who's never had a job before and the fact that its a part time job, thats a lot of work. people underestimate standing on your feet for 5 or 6 hours straight. yea, maybe your sitting out in the hot sun watching some kids play in a pool or your selling chic-fil-a. some people know how it is to stand for long amounts of hours on concrete floors.
people know why I get to stressed out. people know why I get depressed.
I tell people, "sure, Ill do that for you". Ill take your shift. Ill stay another 2 hours after work. its exhausting
I run myself into the ground. then people want to have inteligent conversations with me that require thinking. thats no good. I cant do that at 1 am after Ive worked all day. today is sunday. Ive got a whole week of work ahead of me. Ive got college that starts on wednesday. high school starts next monday. Ive got 1 week and 1 day to read that damn book for ap british lit. I gotta do that shit.
its been awhile since Ive written anything in my lj. no offence lj. its just there is so much drama in life. Ive been attemting to stay away from it. its hard though. people are just drama whores. I dont know how to deal with it sometimes.
when I dont know how to deal with it... I close up. I put my walls up. I block people out. I push them away. I bitch them out. thats the side of me that noone wants to see.
we all get like that, I just feel like its worse coming from me 'cause people dont usually see me as an angry, hateful person. Im not perfect motherfuckers.
I am mentally and physically exhausted.
thurs fri sat sun mon tues wed thurs fri sat
yea, yea. I know I should "quit my bitchin'" but for someone who's never had a job before and the fact that its a part time job, thats a lot of work. people underestimate standing on your feet for 5 or 6 hours straight. yea, maybe your sitting out in the hot sun watching some kids play in a pool or your selling chic-fil-a. some people know how it is to stand for long amounts of hours on concrete floors.
people know why I get to stressed out. people know why I get depressed.
I tell people, "sure, Ill do that for you". Ill take your shift. Ill stay another 2 hours after work. its exhausting
I run myself into the ground. then people want to have inteligent conversations with me that require thinking. thats no good. I cant do that at 1 am after Ive worked all day. today is sunday. Ive got a whole week of work ahead of me. Ive got college that starts on wednesday. high school starts next monday. Ive got 1 week and 1 day to read that damn book for ap british lit. I gotta do that shit.
its been awhile since Ive written anything in my lj. no offence lj. its just there is so much drama in life. Ive been attemting to stay away from it. its hard though. people are just drama whores. I dont know how to deal with it sometimes.
when I dont know how to deal with it... I close up. I put my walls up. I block people out. I push them away. I bitch them out. thats the side of me that noone wants to see.
we all get like that, I just feel like its worse coming from me 'cause people dont usually see me as an angry, hateful person. Im not perfect motherfuckers.
I am mentally and physically exhausted.