Mischief Managed ♦ Fic: And he could change the world with his hands behind his back.
Title: And he could change the world with his hands behind his back.
Author: snow_blossoms
Pairing: Remus/Sirius
Rating: R
Word Count: 1015
Prompt: 121. Adele's "Daydreamer." Lyrics here.
Warnings: So much angst!
Summary: The world is changing and Remus & Sirius are changing with it.
Sometimes people are like trains.
Hear me out now.
Sometimes people are like trains, scooting along the surface of the earth with a certain complacency. And then they come to an underground tunnel and they keep scooting and everything is dark. For a few minutes. Maybe for a few seconds. Everything is dark, see.
And when they emerge from the other side, everything and nothing has changed. They are still them. He is still him, sitting on a train heading north maybe reading the newspaper or eating an apple. And he is still him tapping a drum solo on his knee or smacking his gum and pointing out cows as they pass the countryside. They are still them.
It’s just that, on the other side of that minute of darkness, the world is brighter. The brightest it’s ever been and there are still spots of light in their eyes but suddenly they can see everything very clearly.
And what they see is each other. And he is still him, and he is still him too, but the he you thought he is is suddenly not him at all. And the world has changed, see.
And you can’t undo going through a tunnel.
-----------------------------------------------------------
That’s how it happened for them at least.
-----------------------------------------------------------
It's getting colder now and they're spending less and less time together in their little corner of London. Sirius starts staying out late and Remus starts going out early and neither of them asks the obvious questions. The wheres or with whoms or, and possibly most important, the whys. They just let it go, like a child's balloon as the clouds swallow it alive and its long string like a cat's tail, twitching in the breeze.
They go out for curry with James and Lily. They attend Order meetings. They meet with Dumbledore on special assignment. They get drunk and bump against each other with their shoulders and hips. They walk home with their hands intertwined likes schoolgirls. They drop their shoes and sweaters on the mat just inside the door. They shove each other down on the bed and he bites the curve of the other's shoulder and he tongues the dip and swirl of silver scars. And yes, they get where they're going. And sure, they're both going in the same direction. But they're not going together.
It wasn't always like this, either.
They were young once, with the whole world laid out before them. It was all theirs to win or lose, to use and cast aside. And they did. They raced through time and space with little abandon. With eyes shut and mouths wide open. They played with fire and sometimes people got hurt. Sometimes they got hurt. Eh, casualties of war, they'd say. When they were young.
They didn't know war then. Sirius was all shiny eyes. Remus still glowed from the inside out. Everything was vibrant and, and - not happy, really - Sirius was still a Black. Remus was still - you know. But everything was colored with hope. It all shimmered around the edges.
That was before.
War comes to them like the smell of blood on the sea. The sharks begin to circle. Everyone - everyone is suddenly not what you think. Even the ones you know the best.
Questions hang between them like hummingbirds over new blossoms. Hovering in their faces. Crowding their small flat. Remus wants to crush each and every one with his bare hands but you can't do that. Not to hummingbirds. He can't, at least. He's not a monster.
"Where do you go when you don't sleep here?"
So much they want to ask. But they don't. They let the questions go. Because once they were carefree and they find it's easier to pretend.
They've been in the light for a long time, but they're headed for the tunnel, see.
"Are you going to do it, then?" He asks instead.
"Yeah," he says. "Of course."
"Of course," he parrots. Because it's James. And James and Sirius are just that. James and Sirius. And maybe he's not telling lies to James the way he's telling lies to Remus. Maybe. Remus doesn't know if that would be better or worse.
They don't talk about the specifics. Their eyes are always clouded with suspicion now. The rose colored glasses cast aside with their school books and Quidditch things. They don't talk about specifics but it's going to happen. Sirius is going to be the Potters' secret keeper. And so it goes.
Their lives rush forward. Onward, ever onward.
It gets done. Remus doesn't know when, but it must have happened by now. And they're safe. They're safe. They have to be safe. Sirius would never. No, never.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Remus doesn't know what's going on. Sirius. Sirius - his Sirius - is staring back at him from the front page of the paper. There are owls at his window. There is a buzz in the world and its growing louder. The teapot on the stove starts whistling. Everything goes dark for a second and then another. And when he opens his eyes again, the world has folded in on itself and its only a matter of time before it swallows him whole.
Later, he reads the owls. He scans the newspaper article. He turns on the radio. But he doesn't really hear it. He doesn’t really believe it. He can't believe it. Not yet.
-----------------------------------------------------------
All around him, people raise their glasses in toast to the boy who lived. And all around him, the world burns and turns to ashes.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Someday - someday very soon he will come out of the tunnel. Everything will be very bright and very new. And he will be the man he always was. But across from him, the man he thought he knew will have melted away.
Author: snow_blossoms
Pairing: Remus/Sirius
Rating: R
Word Count: 1015
Prompt: 121. Adele's "Daydreamer." Lyrics here.
Warnings: So much angst!
Summary: The world is changing and Remus & Sirius are changing with it.
Sometimes people are like trains.
Hear me out now.
Sometimes people are like trains, scooting along the surface of the earth with a certain complacency. And then they come to an underground tunnel and they keep scooting and everything is dark. For a few minutes. Maybe for a few seconds. Everything is dark, see.
And when they emerge from the other side, everything and nothing has changed. They are still them. He is still him, sitting on a train heading north maybe reading the newspaper or eating an apple. And he is still him tapping a drum solo on his knee or smacking his gum and pointing out cows as they pass the countryside. They are still them.
It’s just that, on the other side of that minute of darkness, the world is brighter. The brightest it’s ever been and there are still spots of light in their eyes but suddenly they can see everything very clearly.
And what they see is each other. And he is still him, and he is still him too, but the he you thought he is is suddenly not him at all. And the world has changed, see.
And you can’t undo going through a tunnel.
-----------------------------------------------------------
That’s how it happened for them at least.
-----------------------------------------------------------
It's getting colder now and they're spending less and less time together in their little corner of London. Sirius starts staying out late and Remus starts going out early and neither of them asks the obvious questions. The wheres or with whoms or, and possibly most important, the whys. They just let it go, like a child's balloon as the clouds swallow it alive and its long string like a cat's tail, twitching in the breeze.
They go out for curry with James and Lily. They attend Order meetings. They meet with Dumbledore on special assignment. They get drunk and bump against each other with their shoulders and hips. They walk home with their hands intertwined likes schoolgirls. They drop their shoes and sweaters on the mat just inside the door. They shove each other down on the bed and he bites the curve of the other's shoulder and he tongues the dip and swirl of silver scars. And yes, they get where they're going. And sure, they're both going in the same direction. But they're not going together.
It wasn't always like this, either.
They were young once, with the whole world laid out before them. It was all theirs to win or lose, to use and cast aside. And they did. They raced through time and space with little abandon. With eyes shut and mouths wide open. They played with fire and sometimes people got hurt. Sometimes they got hurt. Eh, casualties of war, they'd say. When they were young.
They didn't know war then. Sirius was all shiny eyes. Remus still glowed from the inside out. Everything was vibrant and, and - not happy, really - Sirius was still a Black. Remus was still - you know. But everything was colored with hope. It all shimmered around the edges.
That was before.
War comes to them like the smell of blood on the sea. The sharks begin to circle. Everyone - everyone is suddenly not what you think. Even the ones you know the best.
Questions hang between them like hummingbirds over new blossoms. Hovering in their faces. Crowding their small flat. Remus wants to crush each and every one with his bare hands but you can't do that. Not to hummingbirds. He can't, at least. He's not a monster.
"Where do you go when you don't sleep here?"
So much they want to ask. But they don't. They let the questions go. Because once they were carefree and they find it's easier to pretend.
They've been in the light for a long time, but they're headed for the tunnel, see.
"Are you going to do it, then?" He asks instead.
"Yeah," he says. "Of course."
"Of course," he parrots. Because it's James. And James and Sirius are just that. James and Sirius. And maybe he's not telling lies to James the way he's telling lies to Remus. Maybe. Remus doesn't know if that would be better or worse.
They don't talk about the specifics. Their eyes are always clouded with suspicion now. The rose colored glasses cast aside with their school books and Quidditch things. They don't talk about specifics but it's going to happen. Sirius is going to be the Potters' secret keeper. And so it goes.
Their lives rush forward. Onward, ever onward.
It gets done. Remus doesn't know when, but it must have happened by now. And they're safe. They're safe. They have to be safe. Sirius would never. No, never.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Remus doesn't know what's going on. Sirius. Sirius - his Sirius - is staring back at him from the front page of the paper. There are owls at his window. There is a buzz in the world and its growing louder. The teapot on the stove starts whistling. Everything goes dark for a second and then another. And when he opens his eyes again, the world has folded in on itself and its only a matter of time before it swallows him whole.
Later, he reads the owls. He scans the newspaper article. He turns on the radio. But he doesn't really hear it. He doesn’t really believe it. He can't believe it. Not yet.
-----------------------------------------------------------
All around him, people raise their glasses in toast to the boy who lived. And all around him, the world burns and turns to ashes.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Someday - someday very soon he will come out of the tunnel. Everything will be very bright and very new. And he will be the man he always was. But across from him, the man he thought he knew will have melted away.