(no subject)
so really... im fucking pissed... people tell me they are my friends.... but nobody ever calls me... nobody ever invites me to go places... nobody ever gives a damn about how i feel... its a bunch of shit. i do so much for my friends... im as nice as i can be.. i try not to get into other peoples shit... all i want is to be part of something... i always feel like im a tag-along... like im not wanted there... what is it about me that makes people not want to call me... not want to hang out with me... im not an asshole... im not a dick... id say im the opposite... im always left behind... i dont think anyone ever stops to think... "hey, maybe we should call chris and see if he wants to hang out. i'd bet he'd have a lot of fun with us." but no... im forced to spend my nights alone and depressed. fuck... i mean last night i sat outside for 4 hours, getting bit up by mosquitos, making sure that my friend didnt puke in my front yard. but does she give me the time of day to say "hey, thanks for trying to take care of me. thanks for being a good friend. thanks for everything you've ever done for me." nope... not a thing. this is fucking bullshit. for once i think that i finally met some people that want to be my friends... but fuck.. they never call me unless i call them first... and they probably dont even care how i feel... fuck it all.. its pointless... im doomed to forever be left alone. whats the point anyway.