Word of God speak
Me: God, tonight during prayer I started thinking about Taize, about how close You & I were in France, how beautiful the stars were & how I felt Your extreme Love for me in every moment ... and man God, I'm tired of this "trying to figure out life" crap. I mean, You're being fantastic to me & all, but I'm thinking I might just give up on this whole discernment process & just move to France & worship you for free & not have to worry about a career & a family & a dog & all that convention. I don't like responsibility, God.
God: Meg. Seriously. Knock it off.
Me: What?
God: Knock off the self-pity and the fear.
Me: *stunned silence*
God: I know you think that getting away would fix everything, but your problems will follow you. In many senses, your heart is in the right place ... because I know that you know that I'm the answer. I also know you don't know the question.
Me: So ... eastern France is out of the question, then?
God: Not entirely, but not now, either. I don't want you coming to Me outta default, babe. I want you to run to Me because you want to be near Me and close to Me and in Me and with Me ... not because you're running away from the world and want to use Me as a shield.
Me: Touche, Lord. Touche.
God: And seriously, when you find out what I've got in store for you, you're gonna forget about France.
Me: Really? That good?
God: Do you still not get it, Meg? You are my chosen child and I want what's best for you. I loved you enough to die for you and I'd do it again in a heartbeat. You're the love of my freakin' life, alright? Clear enough?
Me: Wow ... I think maybe You're taking it a little fast, I mean we've only known each other 22 years.
God: I've known you since before time began, kiddo.
Me: Oh yeah, sorry God, sometimes I forget about that whole "eternal" thing. So anyway, back to me, and the life You've got planned. If it's really as great as You say, can't I get a sneak preview, Dad? A trailer, even?
God: You know trailers give too much away and funny lines lose all their charm. I can tell that you’re having trouble trusting. Trust this: Kubrick, Spielberg, Tarentino, Hitchcock. I taught them everything they know. Let Me direct you and I promise, we’ll make a go at the Oscars, love.
Me: Wow, God. That was really cheesy.
God: Yeah … I tend to get that way sometimes. But seriously, here it is, all laid out for you, Meg. Listen up: I am taking care of you. I’ve got your back. I won’t let anything happen to you that won’t bring you closer to me. Life may not be easy, but if it were it wouldn’t be worth it. Cling to me and everything else will be fall into place.
I’m telling you not to fear. I know you’re going to anyway; that’s part of human nature, that’s part of the reason I love you guys so damn much. So go ahead: Buy into that fear. Let it run it’s “what if?” course with you. Embrace it. And then … let it go. It’s like I told Kurt Vonnegut: “Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.”
Me: …
God: Yep.
Me: You know Lord, I really didn’t intend for this to be anything but a witty little quip in my head that I was gonna transcribe into a blog entry.
God: Yeah … but that’s the way it goes, eh Meg? I make all things new.
Me: You’re serious about that?
God: You take the first step, I’ll take the next ninety-nine.
Me: So it’s like a race.
God: Man, you humans and your metaphors. Yeah, I guess so. But don’t worry about speed or competition. Just get here. Just begin.
Me: Hey Father? If I start, if I start right now, will you … I mean, can you -
God: Yes, Meg. If you begin now, of course I’ll be waiting for you at the finish line.
Me: Thanks.
God: Thank you.
Me: Hey God?
God: Yeah, Magoo?
Me: Daddy?
God: Uh huh?
Me: I love you.
God: Right back atcha, kiddo.
God: Meg. Seriously. Knock it off.
Me: What?
God: Knock off the self-pity and the fear.
Me: *stunned silence*
God: I know you think that getting away would fix everything, but your problems will follow you. In many senses, your heart is in the right place ... because I know that you know that I'm the answer. I also know you don't know the question.
Me: So ... eastern France is out of the question, then?
God: Not entirely, but not now, either. I don't want you coming to Me outta default, babe. I want you to run to Me because you want to be near Me and close to Me and in Me and with Me ... not because you're running away from the world and want to use Me as a shield.
Me: Touche, Lord. Touche.
God: And seriously, when you find out what I've got in store for you, you're gonna forget about France.
Me: Really? That good?
God: Do you still not get it, Meg? You are my chosen child and I want what's best for you. I loved you enough to die for you and I'd do it again in a heartbeat. You're the love of my freakin' life, alright? Clear enough?
Me: Wow ... I think maybe You're taking it a little fast, I mean we've only known each other 22 years.
God: I've known you since before time began, kiddo.
Me: Oh yeah, sorry God, sometimes I forget about that whole "eternal" thing. So anyway, back to me, and the life You've got planned. If it's really as great as You say, can't I get a sneak preview, Dad? A trailer, even?
God: You know trailers give too much away and funny lines lose all their charm. I can tell that you’re having trouble trusting. Trust this: Kubrick, Spielberg, Tarentino, Hitchcock. I taught them everything they know. Let Me direct you and I promise, we’ll make a go at the Oscars, love.
Me: Wow, God. That was really cheesy.
God: Yeah … I tend to get that way sometimes. But seriously, here it is, all laid out for you, Meg. Listen up: I am taking care of you. I’ve got your back. I won’t let anything happen to you that won’t bring you closer to me. Life may not be easy, but if it were it wouldn’t be worth it. Cling to me and everything else will be fall into place.
I’m telling you not to fear. I know you’re going to anyway; that’s part of human nature, that’s part of the reason I love you guys so damn much. So go ahead: Buy into that fear. Let it run it’s “what if?” course with you. Embrace it. And then … let it go. It’s like I told Kurt Vonnegut: “Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.”
Me: …
God: Yep.
Me: You know Lord, I really didn’t intend for this to be anything but a witty little quip in my head that I was gonna transcribe into a blog entry.
God: Yeah … but that’s the way it goes, eh Meg? I make all things new.
Me: You’re serious about that?
God: You take the first step, I’ll take the next ninety-nine.
Me: So it’s like a race.
God: Man, you humans and your metaphors. Yeah, I guess so. But don’t worry about speed or competition. Just get here. Just begin.
Me: Hey Father? If I start, if I start right now, will you … I mean, can you -
God: Yes, Meg. If you begin now, of course I’ll be waiting for you at the finish line.
Me: Thanks.
God: Thank you.
Me: Hey God?
God: Yeah, Magoo?
Me: Daddy?
God: Uh huh?
Me: I love you.
God: Right back atcha, kiddo.