Your Heart Outside Your Body (3/10)
Chapter 3: The Training
Chapter 2: The Capitol
Finn was beginning to wish he hadn't eaten so much at breakfast this morning. The rich food was sitting in his stomach, and as he waited with the other tributes to be let into the training center, he was pretty sure he was going to puke. Kurt looked just as bad. He was pale and he looked like he hadn't slept, and he kept looking at Finn like Finn might explode.
The training center was a huge gymnasium. Weapons were lined up on the wall- spears, axes, maces, swords, staffs… it made Finn feel even worse to look at them. It was like someone was saying, "Pick one! How do you want to die?" Or kill the others. Finn wondered if he really could actually kill someone, and he had to swallow back the gorge rising in his throat.
Sue came up and clapped them both on the shoulders. "All right, Twinkles and Sprinkles, remember what we talked about. Each of you pick two weapons- ones that don't involve real skill- and get as proficient as you can. And make sure you hit the survival stations. You guys are city rats, so you need those. Got it?"
"Got it," Finn said, taking a deep breath. Kurt nodded.
"And keep your heads down. Don't say anything to any other tribute that might piss them off. You don't want to get someone after you with a grudge. Got it?" They both nodded, and Sue gave them a push. "Good. Go get 'em, tigers." With that, she backed off and walked away, talking with Woof and Grace.
"Well, at least there aren't any cameras for training," Finn said, just trying to make conversation. The other tributes had been gathering, and looking at them wasn't helping the state of his stomach.
"Oh my god, Finn. Look." Kurt pointed his chin in the direction of a boy who was two inches taller than Finn and probably a hundred pounds heavier. "That's him. That's the winner. That's who's going to kill us."
"Kurt!" Finn grabbed Kurt and clapped his hand over his mouth. Then he realized how that would look, and dropped his hand again. "Keep it together, okay?" he whispered. "This isn't a time for trash talk." Kurt nodded wordlessly. Finn's arm was still around Kurt's shoulder, so he gave him a little half-hug.
"Hey, Eight." A tribute that Finn was pretty sure was from District 2 and named Krev was leering at them. "Gonna protect your little boyfriend in the arena, too?"
"That would be something, wouldn't it?" the other male tribute laughed. "Now there's a way to get a sponsor- give them quite a show. Most sponsors might not go for it, but you'll have a couple tripping over themselves. Which is stupid, since you're never going to be able to pay them back the way they're thinking, unless they get their hands on you before and-"
"Hey!" Finn lurched forward, ready to punch. But someone caught him from behind and he jerked back.
"No fighting the other tributes," a woman said in a bored sort of way. She stepped in between them. "That goes for both of you," she added, looking at Krev. Finn frowned, stepping back, and the woman strode to the center of the group.
"You do not fight a tribute," she barked to the whole group. "If you want to try some of the techniques you will learn, there are people there to assist you."
"What's going to stop us?" Finn whispered to Kurt.
"How much of a chance do you want in the arena?" Kurt whispered back. He was frowning, and Finn had the feeling that he'd screwed up. But before he could ask about it, the woman was reading off the stations that they could work at. Finn knew there was training before the Games, but since it wasn't broadcast, he'd never realized just how many things the tributes could learn. The woman released them with a sharp clap.
"Where should we start?" Finn asked Kurt. "Or should we split up?"
Kurt frowned, looking around the room. "Let's take Sue's advice and head straight to the survival stations," he suggested. "After lunch we can split up and learn different weapons."
It was as good a plan as any. Several of the Career Tributes were already playing with the weapons. Finn watched for a long moment as one fenced a dummy, her sword flashing in the light. She thrust it right into the dummy's gut, and Finn flinched.
The survival stations were a good idea. Finn had never had any illusions about being wicked smart or anything, not like Quinn or Artie or even Kurt. But he hadn't realized how little he knew about living outside until they started telling him stuff. Don't drink water without purifying it or boiling it. How to start a fire. How to snare animals for food, and what plants were edible. He wished he could take notes, because he didn't think he could remember half this stuff, and it all sounded like it could save his life.
Lunch was served in a simple dining room with several tables and was just as huge and rich as their other meals had been. Finn wanted to eat, but he had the feeling that if he gorged himself, he'd end up puking on the mat when they were doing the physical stuff after, and he didn't want to do that. So instead, he sat at a table with Kurt, picking at a stew served over rice and looking around at the other tributes.
The Career tributes sat together. Finn had seen enough Games to know that they would form a pack. It happened every single Game, to the point where it was completely predictable. One year the Gamemakers had taken out the Careers early in the Games with a fire, but after that the deaths didn't come quickly enough and the Games were considered boring. Finn didn't really remember those Games- they'd been on when he was five- but he did remember the image of a skinny boy slogging through the rain, covered in mud and eventually falling over. He shivered.
There were tributes sitting near each other or at the same tables, but they weren't sitting together. It was clear in the way they focused on their meals, the miserable slumps of their shoulders, or the dark, brooding glares. Maybe that was why Finn noticed the boy from District 10 who was watching them.
The boy looked like he was their age. He wasn't a tall boy, but he wasn't overly skinny or anything. He had dark, curly hair and thick, heavy eyebrows. When he noticed Finn staring back at him, he smiled. Smiled. Finn found himself smiling back automatically before he remembered where they were. This wasn't school, and he wasn't just a nice guy who might be fun to hang out with. This was the Games.
He glanced away and then back at the boy. The boy was still watching them.
"Hey Kurt?"
"Mmm?" Kurt looked up from the roll he was picking at.
"What do you think about us ganging up with a couple other tributes? If we want to make allies, maybe we should do it now?"
Kurt frowned. "I don’t know," he said slowly. "It might help, but that's just more people we're going to have to screw over."
"Yeah. I didn't think about that." Finn looked away from the kid watching them. "Just stick to you and me?"
"For now. If that's okay with you," Kurt added hastily.
It was easy to say that at lunch, but after, they split up and went to the weapons station and Finn wasn't so sure. Especially as he found himself with a morning star in his hands.
"You want to swing it like this," the instructor said, demonstrating. The spiked ball whirled around and embedded itself firmly in the dummy's head. "For a killing blow, it's best to land right here, at the temple. Not that the other spots won't hurt. But a death isn't guaranteed. Go ahead. You try it." Finn hoisted the morning star up and swung it around, and narrowly missed hitting his own head. The instructor caught the ball with a gloved hand and sighed. "You need to put more into it," he snapped. "Half-assed is just going to get you killed."
Finn worked on it for a full half-hour, but he still couldn't get it. "I don't think this is a good weapon for me," he admitted.
The instructor eyed him up and down, frowning. "No. Let's try you with the staff. That might… yes. I think that might work better."
It did. The staff was a much more defensive weapon, Finn discovered. He couldn't try to kill anyone with any conviction, but he had no problems defending himself or raising some bruises. It was an awkward weapon and Finn knew he wasn't very good with it, but he had a feeling it was his best bet.
"Not bad," the instructor relented at the end. "But work on it some more." He turned his attention to another tribute.
"There's another advantage to the staff," someone said. Finn spun around to see the boy that had been watching them at lunch. "You can make one, if there's wood in the arena." That was true. Finn stared at him for a long moment. The boy extended his hand. "I'm Blaine Anderson," he said. "District 10."
"Finn Hudson."
"I know." Blaine was still standing with his hand outstretched. "Everyone knows. Is that really your brother with you?"
"Stepbrother."
"Wow. That's intense. Your parents must be upset."
"Finn?"
"Kurt! I wasn't- I mean, I'm not- I mean-"
Kurt sighed. "It's okay, Finn. We can't avoid talking to people forever. Not that there is much of a forever. I'm Kurt Hummel," he told Blaine.
"Blaine Anderson." Blaine finally dropped his hand, realizing that neither Finn nor Kurt were going to take it. "I saw you working with the knife," he said to Kurt. "You're good."
Kurt's stare was level. "I'm horrible."
"No! You're good. You've got agility. You just need to…."
"Have the first idea of what I'm doing?" Kurt asked with an arched eyebrow when Blaine trailed off. But he softened a bit. "I know, but I figure a knife might be easiest to get my hands on."
Blaine laughed and nodded.
That was when it hit Finn, and hit hard. Blaine hadn't been watching them, he'd been watching Kurt. He was watching Kurt now, with smiles and starry eyes, the way no one had ever looked at Kurt back in District 8. He couldn't tell if Kurt noticed or not. He couldn't tell if it was serious or not. Because maybe Blaine did like Kurt, maybe he was just being friendly and looking for an alliance. Or maybe he was looking to get Kurt off his guard, get information or their plans or something, and screw him over.
"Come on," Finn said, grabbing Kurt's arm. "We're almost done for the day. Let's finish up." He yanked Kurt away from Blaine.
"What was that all about?" Kurt whispered when they were far enough. "You were the one talking about forming an alliance."
"Yeah, but you're the one that said no." He looked back at Blaine, who was watching them with a forlorn look on his face. "Trust me, okay? I just think it's a bad idea."
Kurt shrugged, but fortunately didn't argue it any more. They spent the rest of the training time learning how to use a sword (they were both pretty bad at it), and Finn was glad when training let out. He kept close to Kurt, hand on his shoulder when he could.
He wasn't surprised to see Blaine watching them as they left.
***
"Sue? Can I talk to you?"
"What can I do for you, Lurch?" Sue asked, looking up from the papers she was studying.
Finn came into her room, his hands in his pockets. He looked around awkwardly. "Nice room," he said lamely.
"Cut the small talk. That's not what you're here for. Just sit down and spit it out. You're making me seasick the way you keep swaying back and forth, not to mention giving me vertigo as I look up at your unnaturally freakish height. What's going on?"
Finn sat down in one of the leather-covered chairs, obviously still uncomfortable. "I had a question about an alliance," he said finally. "Like, should Kurt and I form one with someone else?"
Sue sat back and took off her glasses. "Who?"
"Blaine Anderson. He's from District 10."
Sue tried to picture the kid, but the most she could come up with was a mop of curls and hideous cow costume that was almost as bad as the boys' cotton balls. She shrugged. "Can't see why you're too worried."
Finn bit his lip, and then finally said it in a rush. "It's Kurt," he admitted. "They were flirting."
"Flirting?" Sue took that information in, leaning back and tapping her chin. "That's kind of interesting. We could play with that a little."
"So we should ally with him?" Finn asked, confused.
Sue considered. Tributes had had encounters before- the whole "last night before we die/hate sex" thing happened quite frequently in the Tower, and it could play out several different ways in the arena. "What's Kurt like?" she asked, because she never paid any attention to the kids' pathetic attempts at social lives in the school. "Can he use it?"
"I don't know," Finn said. "Kurt's never had a boyfriend."
"Never had a boyfriend or never done anything sexual?"
Finn shrugged. "As far as I know, he's never so much as kissed someone."
The red flags went up, the alarms went off, and everything in her head jumped up and down. Sue leaned forward. "No. Absolutely not. Let me be perfectly clear about this, Lurch. Do not ally with this kid."
"Okay…"
"Let me break it down for you. There are only so many ways this kind of scenario can play out in the arena. Inevitably, someone's got to screw someone else over. And if Kurt is a blushing virgin, I can almost guarantee you that he's going to be the one screwed. At best, this District 10 kid will get killed and it will distract Kurt, and that could be deadly. At worst, it's going to come down to the two of them… or to the point where Kurt has to make a choice between him and you." Finn nodded. Slowly, but he nodded. "You got that?"
"I've got it." Finn picked at the knee of his pants. "You're worried about Kurt getting screwed over. You're not worried about me?"
"You're not the one flirting in this scenario." Sue looked down at her papers. Finn didn't say anything, and when she looked up, he was staring at her. His eyes were clearer than she expected.
"You don't think I'm going to get home, do you?" he asked.
"I don't think either of you are going to get home."
"But if you had to bet on one of us- if you had to pick one of us- you'd pick Kurt."
"I'm not picking either of you," she lied. "Do you think I'm joking when I say I think you're both going to die in there?"
Finn nodded. "It's just… I wish…" his eyes glazed over and he had to blink hard to keep from crying. Sue hoped he wasn't going to start bawling- she wasn't good at the comfort thing. But what Finn said surprised her. "I just wish one of us could get home. I don't care which one. I mean, yeah, I'd like to live, but our parents… they've already lost people before. We're all they've got."
Oh, come on. You're exaggerating a little, aren't you? That was what Sue meant to say, because parents had more in their lives than just children, and anyone who thought otherwise was nuts. But at the same time, children supported their parents in District 8 when the cotton got in their lungs or the machines took limbs or the food just got too scarce and they couldn't work. And to lose both children at once…. Sue sighed and sat back.
Outside, the lights of the Capitol twinkled against the sunset, like little jewels. Even Sue hadn't been immune to the beauty when she first saw it, back in the thirty-second Hunger Games, when she'd been angry and ready to kill anyone that stood between her and District 8.
"Look," she finally said, "if you want to get one of you home, just do what I say, okay? Don't form an alliance with this kid right now. There are too many days to go before you're in the arena, and that's just too much time to get attached. Spend time with your brother, and if you two are as close as you say you are, enjoy that time. Because when you're attached at the hip in the arena, you won't be enjoying it at all. Trust me." Finn nodded, and Sue waved him away. "Now get out of here."
When the door was safely closed behind Finn, Sue got up and paced the room angrily. Seventeen and making choices like this, having to say I don't care which one of us lives. Just get one of us home. In the end, Finn would bear her no ill will for what she was going to have Kurt do. Not if it worked.
Sue screamed and punched the wall.
***
In the Districts, training days meant interviews of various oddsmakers and showing footage of past Hunger Games, and what former tributes had done with various weapons. Will had all of New Directions over to his own apartment to watch, because he didn't want Burt and Carole to think they had to feed the kids.
"It's not much," he said, setting out a plate of flax bread and some cheese. The cheese had cost him in the marketplace, but when he'd explained who it was for the dealer had given him a better price. Some of the kids brightened a little, which didn't surprise Will. Food was pretty scarce.
Caesar Flickerman was interviewing mentors. He didn't actually ask about the tributes and the mentors weren't allowed to tell much, but there were always little teases about what the tributes were like. He was interviewing the District 6 mentors when Puck suddenly said, "I should have volunteered."
"What?" Will looked at him with surprise.
Puck was glaring at the TV, dark and brooding. "I should have volunteered," he said. "When Finn was called. Who lets their best friend be called out to die and doesn't do a damn thing to stop it?"
"Lots of people," Quinn said. "People don't volunteer for the Hunger Games."
"They do in District 1 and 2 and 4," Mike said.
"But it's different there," Quinn insisted. "They train. You know they do. They go into it knowing exactly what the risks are. They're willing."
"I would have been doing the same," Puck said.
"No, you would have been trading your life for Finn's because you thought it was the right thing to do, not because you wanted to," Quinn corrected Puck firmly.
"Quinn's right," Mercedes said. "You wouldn't have wanted to be in the Games any more than Finn does."
"And besides," Sam said, lying on the floor and propping himself up on his elbows, "when they called Finn's name you didn't know Kurt was going to be called, too."
"Yeah. You thought that Kurt would still be there for their parents," Tina added. "And you've got a little sister at home."
"And your father is worthless," Santana added. It was only what everyone was thinking, but it still seemed bald to hear it out loud.
"They're right," Will said. "It's only happened once in my life, when I was nineteen. That's the only time I've ever seen it happen in District 8."
"It's still not fair," Puck said angrily, getting to his feet. "I should have been able to do something.."
"Anything you would have done would have gotten you shot," Quinn said matter-of-factly. "And possibly your mother and Sarah, too."
Puck scowled, and stormed out onto the fire escape outside Will's window, leaving an awkward silence in his place. "Should we go after him?" Mercedes asked.
"Give him a few minutes," Will said. The kids turned their attention back to the television, where Caesar was winding up his interview with the District 6 mentors. Will waited until he was done, and then in the space in between that and the District 7 mentors, he slipped out to the fire escape. Puck was sitting on the balcony, glaring at the world.
"You okay?" Will asked him.
"No. I'm not okay. It's not fair," Puck said. "I think that same thing every year, but every year I manage to just forget about it. This year I can't. Finn and Kurt are going to die and all I can do is sit at a damn TV screen and watch."
"What else could you do?" Will asked helplessly.
Puck's eyes were like fire. "I don't know. Take on all the fucking Peacekeepers in District 8. Run away and get to the Capitol and kill Snow. Make a stink, even if it means I get shot. Something."
"Puck-"
"No. Think about it." Puck stood up. "How long am I supposed to go on just watching other kids die?"
Will remembered feeling the same thing once, when he was younger. Everyone did. "Because it's futile, Puck," Will said tiredly. "What would you accomplish? You'd get killed and they'd bury your story and nothing would change. Besides, I never took you for a crusader. If I remember correctly, you did your best to make Kurt's life miserable at school, and you and Finn have had your moments as well."
Puck shrugged angrily, not denying any of it. "Yeah, well, sometimes you need to be hit over the head with a rock, Mr. Schuester. And when your best friend and another friend get called up to die, that tends to do it."
"But there's nothing you can do,"
"I know. I just wish I could." They sat in silence for a long moment, looking out at the rubble and filth and grit that was District 8. "Besides," Puck said, when Will was just about to go inside, "what have any of us really got left to lose?"
***
"There's a problem," Julius said darkly, looking up from his notes.
"What, did the Capitol run out of furniture polish to buff that shiny metal pate of yours?" Sue asked. "Because if they did, I'm pretty sure you can get some of that wax they use on the floors from the cleaners."
Julius ignored her. "The bloodbath. They're going to need to get supplies. They're not equipped."
"That's the point of the Cornucopia, genius."
"That's not what I mean by 'equipped.' I've heard some rumors from the trainers. Your boys are only on the edge of being able to survive that opening fight. And the District 2 tributes have been giving them a bit of a hard time. I think they're targeting them. They don't want to let an alliance like that survive."
Sue frowned. "You know what, Cueball? Until you're in that damn arena, facing down twenty-three other people howling for your blood, you don't get to tell me how to do my job, okay?"
Julius rolled his eyes and went back to his paperwork. "You're such a joy to work with, Sue."
"I know." Sue tried to set the back of his head on fire with her glare, but it still didn't work. She settled for whacking him upside the head with her own clipboard and disappearing into her room.
The problem was, Cueball might actually have a point.
***
It was no surprise when Blaine Anderson from District 10 sat down with them at lunch the next day. Or, more accurately, sat with Kurt, since Finn was still at the food table debating between the myriad of choices. When Finn sat down, Blaine and Kurt were laughing. Laughing. The only other tributes who laughed were the Careers.
"So then," Blaine was saying, gesturing with a roll, "the cow turned around and tried to go through the front door! I don't know how it got in the house in the first place, but she knocked the lamp off the table with the tail. The house stunk like kerosene for weeks." Blaine looked up as Finn sat down. "Oh. Hey, Finn."
"What are you doing here?" Finn asked.
Blaine looked down at the table and then back up. "Eating lunch?" he guessed.
"We're not allying with you," Finn said bluntly.
"I didn't ask you to," Blaine said, narrowing his eyes in a confused sort of way. "I was just talking to Kurt."
Yeah, well, don't Finn wanted to say, but the look on Kurt's face said if he wanted to even make it to the arena, he'd better not. "As long as we're clear," he muttered and sat down. He picked at his lunch moodily as Kurt and Blaine continued to talk.
He was almost done when Krev stopped by their table. "So what's so special about District 8?" he asked.
Kurt and Blaine ignored him, but Finn looked up. "Huh?"
"District 8 gets to break the rules, huh? Send three girl tributes instead of two?"
Finn started to say something, but was stopped by Kurt's hand on his arm. "Don't," Kurt warned. Krev laughed and walked away.
"Why not?" Finn fumed. "After what he said-"
"Because he'll hurt you and then you'll be at a disadvantage in the arena," Kurt answered, and then arched his eyebrow at Finn meaningfully. "I don't need you getting hurt just because of your testosterone-laden desire to cover up your own guilty conscience."
"Hey, I don't have a guilty conscience!" Kurt looked at Blaine pointedly. Blaine shifted, and Finn got what Kurt was trying to say. "What? No. I don't have a problem with you guys… doing whatever you're doing."
"You're lying. I know you, Finn."
"It's not like that," Finn insisted weakly, looking around. People were starting to watch. "That's not my problem."
"Then what is your problem, Finn?" Kurt said. "We're not making plans. We're just talking."
"I don't know. Maybe I just don't want you to get hurt."
Kurt laughed, dry and bitter. "Right. Because we're not just about to fight forty-six other people to the death."
"That's not what I mean!" Finn raised his voice.
"Then what do you mean, Finn? What's your problem?" Kurt stood up. "Is it you don't like having a gay brother with the whole world watching? Is it that you're afraid you might get some weird cooties if I so much as talk to another boy?"
"It's that you fall in love with any guy who actually looks at you," Finn snapped, standing up to meet Kurt angrily. "If we were at home I wouldn't think twice about it, but right now it's just gonna get you screwed."
"News flash, Finn. I'm already screwed!"
"Yeah, well, let's not make it figurative, okay?"
"Literal! The phrase is, 'let's not make it literal!"
"Well, either way!" Finn shouted back. "You always do this, Kurt! Every time! I tell you I'm upset about one thing and you turn it around and make it so you're the victim. The only victim!"
"Well, forgive me for not forgetting that you used to toss me in the dumpster before Mr. Schuester started glee club! You have to admit, Finn, you don't exactly have the best track record with me!"
"That was before!"
"And when you moved in?" Kurt's eyes were sharp. "When you called me a faggot?"
"Well, if you hadn't spent the whole year before creeping on me-"
"So sue me for being interested! You're the one who never told me no!"
"I made it clear!"
"Like hell you did!"
"How much straighter did I have to act to get it through your thick skull that I don't like guys? Not that way?"
"A simple 'no' would have sufficed!" Kurt was flushed an ugly shade of red. "But you were too busy getting off on someone liking you to shut it down with a modicum of dignity!"
"Like you would have listened anyway!"
"You know what? Fuck you, Finn Hudson. Just… FUCK YOU. I'll get through these damn Games on my own!" He grabbed a roll from his plate and flounced out the door and back towards the gymnasium.
"Oh yeah?" Finn shouted after him. "You just try it! Without me, you'll be dead in a day. Got that, Kurt? A DAY."
He was shaking as he looked around the room. Every last eye was on them, to the point where even the Avox refilling one of the dishes was watching. Finn nodded. "That goes for all of you, too," he said, and sat down shakily.
***
"Did you do it?" Sue demanded as soon as the elevator door closed.
"We did it," Kurt sighed. "Although Finn's got some sharp claws when he wants to."
"Look who's talking," Finn said. "Bringing up the whole thing from last year? I thought we were past that, dude."
"We are," Kurt said, looking down. "Mostly."
Finn sighed. "I still don't get why we had to do that. When we do the interviews, they're all gonna see us doing the brother thing again."
"They'll think that's the act," Sue said, being careful to pick small words, because this was the third time she'd had to explain it to Lugnut here. "This will make the other tributes think you broke your alliance and you're just acting like you're doing the brother thing in public."
"They'll figure it out right after the bloodbath," Finn protested.
"But you'll have gotten through the bloodbath," Sue said. "That's all I'm trying to do with this, is get you through the first day. If you sold it to them, you two fighting together will be enough of a shock to throw the Careers off for a minute or two. At the bloodbath, that's enough. Then you grab a few things and get the hell out of there as fast as you can."
Finn nodded, and maybe this time it had sunk in. Sue looked at Kurt, who was staring out the window of the elevator as they rode up to their floor. He was scowling, too. Well, this looked to be a pleasant night.
She ate dinner with the gloom brothers and then escaped down to the reception that the Capitol was holding for the mentors. Not that she really wanted to go, but what choice did she have? After winning her own Games, Sue had very quickly learned that the best thing to do was keep your head down and not make trouble.
Sue was never sure if she liked or didn't like circulating among the victors. On the one hand, they'd each been through the same hell. There was no one else in Panem that understood what winning the Hunger Games truly meant except for the other victors. The difference was how they responded to it. They got harder or they broke, every last one. Sue didn't know which ones she respected more.
"Where's Woof?" she asked Grace when she spotted her.
"Not sure if we'll see him tonight," Grace said, not smiling. "He's having a hard time dealing with Celia."
Woof wasn't one of the ones that became harder. Sue sighed. Not that she envied Woof and what he had to do, but still.
Laughter exploded from the other side of the room, and Sue ditched Grace to casually walk over and hear what was so damn funny. Because the group that was laughing were all Careers in the past, and whatever they were laughing at, Sue was pretty sure it was something she needed to hear.
"I swear," she heard Shine saying as she approached. "I don't know who is more delusional! I mean, it's a Quarter Quell. Of course a Career is going to take it. No one else has a shot. But I heard old Shannon from District 12 thinks her tribute's actually got a shot this year."
"District 12?" Onyx, a man whose hair matched his name, had to double over because he was laughing. "Shannon's the only one from 12 who's ever won the Games in fifty years, and that's only because she played the year they took the Career pack out!"
"And then there's Chaff from District 11- he's only five years out, so his kid's got no shot, and Wes from 10."
"Moo," was Onyx's opinion.
"I don't know, Shine." Satin was from District 1 and had skin that lived up to his name, to the point where Sue was positive it was altered. "How about District 8 this year? I mean, Woof's given up and Grace is going through the motions, but Sue! There's a winner for the most delusional award. Those boys don't have a chance!"
"I don't know," Onyx leered. "Those costumes caught a few eyes. I heard Augustus saying he'd sponsor them just for a chance for a night with the two of them."
"Ugh. He'd be lucky to get one of them," Shine said, rolling her eyes. "Although I wouldn't mind taking that Finn for a roll myself. Too bad he's dead on the first day. And then there's-"
"Well, well, well." Sue decided that she'd better make herself known now, before they moved on. "Look who's here. The hyena pack."
"Sue." Shine put on an obviously fake smile. "We were just talking about you."
"So I hear," Sue said, tapping her ears. "Nice to know old Augustus is chomping at the bit. Thanks for that little bit of intel." Shine made a face, and Sue winked at her. "Some year, isn't it?"
"Sue, what are you doing?" Satin asked. "You know your boys don't have a chance in hell."
"Of course they do. This is our year. My boys have got something that no one else has got - a built-in alliance. That's going to get them far."
The other victors exchanged looks from the corners of their eyes, and there were smothered snickers. "That's not what I hear," Satin said with smirk.
"You keep believing that, Sue," Onyx said. "But once they're in that arena, they'll turn on each other, just like every other scared little tribute does."
"We'll see. Ladies. Gentlemen." Sue bowed out and left. That was exactly what she wanted- confirmation that the Careers thought that the alliance between Kurt and Finn was shattered already. It wouldn't buy them much, but it would buy them something.
Sue barely managed to wait until she was out of sight before she punched the air in triumph.
***
"You want to go out on the terrace?" Finn asked Kurt.
Kurt shrugged. "Sure." He'd been listless and dead-eyed all night, and Finn had a pretty good idea as to why.
The terrace was pretty. It was basically a walled in garden, with flowers and trees and a few little benches here and there. There were other rooms and other tributes above them, they couldn't get down onto this little garden of solitude. Finn waited until the door had shut behind them and he was certain they were alone before he said, "I'm sorry about earlier."
Kurt made a face. "Don't be. You did what we were told to do."
"Yeah, but I went for some things that were below the belt. Dredged up old history. I know it probably looked better, especially because it really got you mad, but I'm sorry."
Kurt studied him and then gave a small, tight nod. "I am, too."
There was a peach tree on their terrace. Finn picked one and tossed it to Kurt, and then picked another for himself. "I know I shouldn't be grateful," he said, biting into the fruit and trying to catch the juice dribbling down his chin, "but the food here is amazing."
"It is," Kurt agreed. He sat down against the wall, eating his peach more neatly than Finn was eating his, and looked up at the sky. "I wish you could see the stars like this from District 8."
"Yeah?" Finn sat down next to Kurt. They were sitting shoulder to shoulder, thigh to thigh. The stars were bright, although they were still dimmed by the lights of the Capitol. "Heard one of the kids from District 11 say that they don't look the same out here," Finn said. "That they're even brighter out there."
"They would be. It's the agricultural district. They don't have the factories like we do." Kurt sighed, licking his finger. "I wish I'd gotten to see more of the Districts before I died."
"Yeah," Finn agreed, although he'd never really had that desire. "You know what I would have liked to do? I would have liked to learn how to fix some of the machines. Burt was going to show me, but he just never got the time."
"I wish we could have been there for the New Directions concert," Kurt said. "The one that opens the school year."
"I wish I could have made it to the District games," Finn said. "I think I had a shot at playing this year."
"I wish I could have had a boyfriend."
"I wish I could have had sex," Finn admitted.
"I wish I could have had a kiss," Kurt topped him. "Just once. Just to know what it felt like to kiss a boy."
Finn stared at his mostly eaten peach. "If this wasn't the Games," he said slowly, "I think Blaine would have been interested."
"I wish it wasn't the Games," Kurt said softly.
"Yeah. Me, too."
They sat in silence for a long moment, finishing their fruit. Finn sucked every little bit of juice off the pit. Fresh fruit in District 8 was a rarity. He wished he could send some home to his mom. Hell, he wished he could be home with his mom.
"I wish I could sing," Kurt said, looking straight ahead. "Ever since we got on that train, I haven't wanted to. But it's such a part of me… I don't know. I feel like I've started dying already."
Finn knew exactly what Kurt meant. "Are you scared of it?" he asked. "Dying, I mean?"
"Yes."
"Yeah. Me, too."
"I think I'd be less scared if I knew it would be quick," Kurt said. "Or if I knew… if I knew I wouldn't be alone." His voice trembled on the last word, and it hit Finn straight in the gut.
Finn laid a hand on Kurt's shoulder. "Hey. You're not going to be alone, okay? I promise you that, and I'm gonna keep that promise. If you die, you're not going to be alone."
Kurt stared at him, his eyes wet with tears. He had to wipe them away, reminding Finn of those awful days after Burt had had that heart attack and they had no idea if he'd live or die. He wanted to put his arm around Kurt, but Kurt wasn't the kind of person who liked to be touched when he was upset. Finn had learned that well enough. So instead, he just got up and got them another peach each, and then, even though he didn't feel like it, sat down next to Kurt and started singing. Just a soft song about a blackbird, a lullaby from District 8. Kurt snuffled and wiped his nose one more time, and then picked up the descant.
Their voices wound around each other, comforting them in the clear night.
Chapter 4: The Interviews