涙そうそう
I'm going home.
Le shock. But don't worry, I don't quit the exchange programm, I'll just spend a week in good old Germany.
I bought the tickets yesterday.
Lately, my mood had many ups and downs, especially on my birthday last week I felt like jumping on the next plane and go home immediately. It's not like I wouldn't enjoy being here, but... you know... It's been an awfully long time, and when your far away from your beloved even the tiniest things can make you really upset. So, yeah, you could say, I was somewhat ... unstable. And then, last Thursday my notebook broke. I hate windows. And I hate me for being stupid enough to make a PC that's not even half a year old have a complete crash down. Anyway, that was the point, when my unsteadiness changed to utter depression, because after several tries, we (me and the people who tried to help me fix it) realised, that there was no way to fix it in Japan. I don't care that much about the computer itself, I'm most worried about my data (haven't burnt my Kyoto pictures yet O.o). It should be alright though, I guess. Still, when I called my mother on Sunday to tell her that I propably won't be able to call for some time, I realised all the more how much I miss my family and before I even knew it I was crying really hard. Then my mother said: "If you really feel that lonely, just get a flight and don't care about the money!" I hadn't considered actually going home before, but when she said that, some switch in my head made click. And there I was in Tokyo on Monday, spending the money I had saved for traveling in Japan on a flight back home.
I kind of feel like giving in and running away. I feel really sorry for having caused so much trouble to many people because of this sudden decision. I don't know how to make up for this, but I certainly will, somehow.
As for now, all I can do is to seize the days in Germany and start healthy and optimistic into the next semester.
Le shock. But don't worry, I don't quit the exchange programm, I'll just spend a week in good old Germany.
I bought the tickets yesterday.
Lately, my mood had many ups and downs, especially on my birthday last week I felt like jumping on the next plane and go home immediately. It's not like I wouldn't enjoy being here, but... you know... It's been an awfully long time, and when your far away from your beloved even the tiniest things can make you really upset. So, yeah, you could say, I was somewhat ... unstable. And then, last Thursday my notebook broke. I hate windows. And I hate me for being stupid enough to make a PC that's not even half a year old have a complete crash down. Anyway, that was the point, when my unsteadiness changed to utter depression, because after several tries, we (me and the people who tried to help me fix it) realised, that there was no way to fix it in Japan. I don't care that much about the computer itself, I'm most worried about my data (haven't burnt my Kyoto pictures yet O.o). It should be alright though, I guess. Still, when I called my mother on Sunday to tell her that I propably won't be able to call for some time, I realised all the more how much I miss my family and before I even knew it I was crying really hard. Then my mother said: "If you really feel that lonely, just get a flight and don't care about the money!" I hadn't considered actually going home before, but when she said that, some switch in my head made click. And there I was in Tokyo on Monday, spending the money I had saved for traveling in Japan on a flight back home.
I kind of feel like giving in and running away. I feel really sorry for having caused so much trouble to many people because of this sudden decision. I don't know how to make up for this, but I certainly will, somehow.
As for now, all I can do is to seize the days in Germany and start healthy and optimistic into the next semester.