(no subject)
we're both lying through our teeth
not knowing quite at all what anything really means
feeling worse with every empty word that's said
and we dont really care
we dont really care at all
its a terrible feeling when you know that
every single word you say comes out wrong
you say it with such meaning
but you dont know what you mean at all
broken lies and shattered hearts
a promise unkept, a mind unclear
you dont know what to feel
you dont know what you should feel
....
i think thats all ive got.
i feel so awful lately, and i dont know why.
i kind of know why right now....i really need to learn to not get involved with the wrong people.
i really just need a good solid person in my life right now....i really need someone who can really truely be here for me and who will try to understand whats going on with me....i feel horrid, and it feels like theres no one that can/will help me.
i need someone now more than ever...i wish i knew who...
i really need someone. i really do.
im really tired of all this up and down with people...especially guys.
im so lonely right now, its awful.
and it always seems like im not good enough, or old enough, or fun enough, or smart enough, or focused enough, or something.
for once...i want someone to see me differently...like, still see me...but in a way thats good enough for them. and someone that's good enough for me.
i feel like i need to be kind of "selfish" right now...because lately (well, not so much lately as as long as i can remember) ive been trying to please everyone else and trying to make sure that everyone else is ok, and that everyone else is happy....but it seems like the more i try to make sure that the people around me are happy and ok and all of that...the unhappier i am, and the more not-okay that i am. and im tired of it. for once, i just want someone that will do all of those things for me...and to try and comfort me when im sad, and try to cheer me up...but who knows. i dont.
i told him that i loved him
but his mind was already clouded
and he doesnt remember the words i said
or his bitter-sweet response
"no matter what happens ill never stop wanting to see you"
he wont ever remember
and im not sure that i want him to
he wont ever remember...
but i dont think ill ever forget.
not knowing quite at all what anything really means
feeling worse with every empty word that's said
and we dont really care
we dont really care at all
its a terrible feeling when you know that
every single word you say comes out wrong
you say it with such meaning
but you dont know what you mean at all
broken lies and shattered hearts
a promise unkept, a mind unclear
you dont know what to feel
you dont know what you should feel
....
i think thats all ive got.
i feel so awful lately, and i dont know why.
i kind of know why right now....i really need to learn to not get involved with the wrong people.
i really just need a good solid person in my life right now....i really need someone who can really truely be here for me and who will try to understand whats going on with me....i feel horrid, and it feels like theres no one that can/will help me.
i need someone now more than ever...i wish i knew who...
i really need someone. i really do.
im really tired of all this up and down with people...especially guys.
im so lonely right now, its awful.
and it always seems like im not good enough, or old enough, or fun enough, or smart enough, or focused enough, or something.
for once...i want someone to see me differently...like, still see me...but in a way thats good enough for them. and someone that's good enough for me.
i feel like i need to be kind of "selfish" right now...because lately (well, not so much lately as as long as i can remember) ive been trying to please everyone else and trying to make sure that everyone else is ok, and that everyone else is happy....but it seems like the more i try to make sure that the people around me are happy and ok and all of that...the unhappier i am, and the more not-okay that i am. and im tired of it. for once, i just want someone that will do all of those things for me...and to try and comfort me when im sad, and try to cheer me up...but who knows. i dont.
i told him that i loved him
but his mind was already clouded
and he doesnt remember the words i said
or his bitter-sweet response
"no matter what happens ill never stop wanting to see you"
he wont ever remember
and im not sure that i want him to
he wont ever remember...
but i dont think ill ever forget.