Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans...
So true, John Lennon, so true. I can't sleep; therefore, I write. bah. Break's going ok, but I haven't tackled much of the work I have to do yet. Got in a car accident today, which sucks majorly because it's probably going to cost a bundle to repair and I'll be without a car for at least a few days. I have excellent timing. I was really counting on being able to drive myself places while Carly was at work this week. Of course, I spent a good portion of the day feeling incredibly guilty about such a stupid mistake on my part turning into a huge, expensive hastle. I don't know what happened exactly; I spun out on a patch of ice, i think, which caused me to swerve into a guardrail and eventually slide into a ditch. I vaguely remember seeing a semi truck, so it's probably lucky that I'm not paralyzed or something. But whatever, I'm not, so it doesn't matter. Just pissed at myself because I feel like I screwed up the day; had to have my dad waste an hour or more of his day to come pick me up and deal with my phone calls, which meant cutting his time to visit with my sister short. It just shouldn't have happened, and I know it doesn't do any good, but I can't help but beat myself up about it. I know, I know, lots of people get in accidents. Could've happened to anyone etc etc. I'll just be glad when it's all taken care of; stressful to have it hanging over my head. Trying to enjoy the break since I know that once I get back, school is going to be kicking my ass. 7 weeks, and then spring term, and then a summer class....and then...i'm FREE. I'm actually excited about the uncertainty of it all. I can't wait to move on. I'm ready to get out on my own and explore some new territory. I know that if I'm not happy with the pattern of my behavior, all I have to do is decide to change it, so that's what I'm going to work on from now on. Self-fulfilling prophecy - if I expect myself to screw up, i'm going to. I just have to learn to believe in myself more, that I have the power to change. I don't have to be the little sister forever. It's all in how I think about it. I can get what I want and be who I want to be. I just have to keep fighting and reminding myself that it's worth the fight. On a side note, commercials for sleep-aids keep coming on, and I laugh a little bit inside each time :)...