(no subject)
Today I received a completed photo album that my Mom and her best friend, Debbie Tomlin, had been working on up until she became too ill to complete it. At first, I wasn't sure I wanted to turn it's pages...maybe another day. But my curiosity got the better of me, a recurring theme in my life. It was healing to see my family's history in picture form. My parents gave me and my siblings such a good childhood, especially considering the circumstances that they had to overcome. I carry my Mother's passing with me every day, in everything I do. When I step on stage, I try to play at a level that's worthy of the support she gave my art. When I interact with people, even those I don't like, I try to retain a level of respect and compassion that lives up to the legacy she left in our family and community. I was nice to see her face. I had a good cry. Sometimes I feel like I should cry more, like maybe that would give my Mom's passing more importance. Truth be told, I did so much grieving while helping to take care of her at the end of her life that I feel drained of emotion. It's only in the last few months that I have started to feel that spark of life in me renew. That spark is what my Mom instilled in me, and I try to respect it. I try to live in a way that would make her proud. I think I'm doing ok...