(no subject)
I have to get this out of my head before it festers and starts to infect the rest of my brain.
I am terrified.
I am at a point in my ceramics work in the quarter where if I make a single mistake, all of my work that I've done so far will be ruined.
The point of no return.
What has me really terrified though, is the fact that my fear of making a mistake is actually preventing me from continuing to work.
Also, the realization that I will probably never have a single original idea.
How can I be an artist without them?
And I wonder, has anyone else come to this conclusion before?
If my theory is true, they must have.
How does this not frighten them to no end?
Maybe they just have more hope than I do.
Or more creativity, I'm not sure.
The thing is, I'm not really smart enough to have one.
An original idea that is.
Everything I make has been done before, and probably better.
It wouldn't be a problem except for the fact that I'm not completely stupid.
So working in any other way or at some minimum wage job would not be the least bit fulfilling.
What happens if I can't do all or nothing?
What's left after those?
I am terrified.
I am at a point in my ceramics work in the quarter where if I make a single mistake, all of my work that I've done so far will be ruined.
The point of no return.
What has me really terrified though, is the fact that my fear of making a mistake is actually preventing me from continuing to work.
Also, the realization that I will probably never have a single original idea.
How can I be an artist without them?
And I wonder, has anyone else come to this conclusion before?
If my theory is true, they must have.
How does this not frighten them to no end?
Maybe they just have more hope than I do.
Or more creativity, I'm not sure.
The thing is, I'm not really smart enough to have one.
An original idea that is.
Everything I make has been done before, and probably better.
It wouldn't be a problem except for the fact that I'm not completely stupid.
So working in any other way or at some minimum wage job would not be the least bit fulfilling.
What happens if I can't do all or nothing?
What's left after those?