i thought this was destroyed
I tried to access livejournal a long time ago, but I thought it didn't exist anymore. Then the other day, I kind of stumbled upon it. It's been like, 3 years since I've been on here, but it feels like so much longer.
I think I'm gonna be complete honest with you LJ, just to get things off my mind. I had a blog on some other site once so I could be completely honest, but i forget where it is and it wasn't handy. so, here it is. I really kind of hope that no one reads this!!
I'm a self conscious flirt. what the hell does that even mean? I think it means I have no guts. If I was a man, you would say I had no balls. It kinda sucks. I want to be confident, but I'm not. I think I'm very unnattractive and annoying. However, I've seen this year that a lot of people whom I adore think I'm kinda cool back. Like Kels told me that Matt said I was hilarious. That made my day. Hell, it made my week.
Prom is worrying me. I'm not sure who to go with or who to ask. That's a lie. I have a list of possibilites, I'm just too much of a chicken to do anything about it. But personally I'd like to be asked. It's my damn senior prom. And that may actually happen tomorrow. I'd like to say that I'm not getting my hopes up, but I am. Of course... blah.
I love being a girl. I've noticed that I've gotten a little more superficial/vain or something. I love to look at myself in the mirror. CORRECTION I like to analyze myself in the mirror haha. Honestly, I do think I'm pretty. I do. I just don't know why other people can't or don't see it. blah! But anyways, I love clothes, makeup and accessories. I heart being a girl. Except for the fact that when we're camping we can't pee as easily in the woods. haha :P
So, I'm seriously stressed out. AP Lit is killing me. We have notecards due for our research paper next thursday, and I haven't even read my two books yet. It makes me want to curse a lot! haha But seriously, I can't wait to graduate. I'm just so tired of being stressed. After I graduate I'm gonna read so much of the freakin Goosebumps books! haha. Stuff I loved as a kid that's I don't have too think too much about when I'm reading it.
So there's my little talk for today dear ol' LJ. I think I feel a little better about things. I didn't say everything that was on my mind tho. it's a'ight.
I think I'm gonna be complete honest with you LJ, just to get things off my mind. I had a blog on some other site once so I could be completely honest, but i forget where it is and it wasn't handy. so, here it is. I really kind of hope that no one reads this!!
I'm a self conscious flirt. what the hell does that even mean? I think it means I have no guts. If I was a man, you would say I had no balls. It kinda sucks. I want to be confident, but I'm not. I think I'm very unnattractive and annoying. However, I've seen this year that a lot of people whom I adore think I'm kinda cool back. Like Kels told me that Matt said I was hilarious. That made my day. Hell, it made my week.
Prom is worrying me. I'm not sure who to go with or who to ask. That's a lie. I have a list of possibilites, I'm just too much of a chicken to do anything about it. But personally I'd like to be asked. It's my damn senior prom. And that may actually happen tomorrow. I'd like to say that I'm not getting my hopes up, but I am. Of course... blah.
I love being a girl. I've noticed that I've gotten a little more superficial/vain or something. I love to look at myself in the mirror. CORRECTION I like to analyze myself in the mirror haha. Honestly, I do think I'm pretty. I do. I just don't know why other people can't or don't see it. blah! But anyways, I love clothes, makeup and accessories. I heart being a girl. Except for the fact that when we're camping we can't pee as easily in the woods. haha :P
So, I'm seriously stressed out. AP Lit is killing me. We have notecards due for our research paper next thursday, and I haven't even read my two books yet. It makes me want to curse a lot! haha But seriously, I can't wait to graduate. I'm just so tired of being stressed. After I graduate I'm gonna read so much of the freakin Goosebumps books! haha. Stuff I loved as a kid that's I don't have too think too much about when I'm reading it.
So there's my little talk for today dear ol' LJ. I think I feel a little better about things. I didn't say everything that was on my mind tho. it's a'ight.