I hate crying
So since I'm not going out to lunch today I have taken the liberty of getting some feelings out that have been needing to get out for 3 years. As I am sitting here telling this person my feelings I'm balling my eyes out. It's because I have had these feelings balled up inside and have never actually sat down and gotten them out there. Anger, pain, sorrow and hate. Those 4 mixed together in me at once isn't pretty. I can be a harsh bitch when it comes to those. I wished this person dead at one point because of those and I was also pregnant at the time. I'm still a bit teary eyed from it all but it's time for me to let it all out. All this still puts a wall between us now that we are friends. I just want that person to realize that it takes time for a person to heal. After all the shit I went through, it's gonna take me a hell of a lot longer cause of all the shit that happened within about a 2 1/2 year span.