i feel a million times better when i am around you... but i feel that i have changed you... people tell me that since we have been going out that you have changed alot... wont say who... but i feel that you prefer other things over me... i dont want to be your main focus... but i do want you to atleast... i dont know... i dont want to change you... if i say anything it will get taken the wrong way... im sorry... im really trying to make this work... but i dont know if i can... i need your help... something inside is seriously about to snap... there is so much stuff you dont know... and so much stuff that you need to know but i just dont have the balls to tell you... i feel there is so much you are hiding from me... i found out what you were talking about earlier, when you said you needed to find someone with a car... i just dont get it... i dont even know... i was in second hour with chase today and i just sat there and cried and told him everything... i really wish it was you sitting there... but if it was you it would have been so much harder... i just dont know anymore... i really want to be able to tell you everything... but i feel like i cant open up to you... im afraid to like actually 'love' you... i need you to tell me what you want... im sick of this relationship seeming to be all about me... i NEED to know about you...
then what do u want to know? i've bore my soul. i don't know what else to tell you. i've told you about my hopes, my dreams and my past. i don't have any secrets left. i don't know what you haven't told me, and i need to know who told u about me needing a car.... we need to talk. obviously. but i can't talk about this on the phone,and u freeze up and cry in person. so how am i supposed to know? you say u want me to know. but you don't. you try to get rid of this feeling by trying to find my demons. but i'm sry. i told you about my demons. i told you all i can tell. it's your turn. i feel like the whole time we've been going out, i get the kayliegh that everyone else gets. thats not what i signed up for. i want the real kayleigh joy. not the mask. the balls in your court. i don't have anything to say. but you have more than your fare share of secrets.
i dont know... there is just so much family stuff going on... and so much stuff that i have to keep in confidentiality that its so overwhelming... and i dont want to put the burden on you knowing... its just something i have to learn to deal with on my own... but i would really like it if you were here to help... not this weekend b/c you have to work... but sometime very soon we are going to have to sit down and just talk... talk until there is nothing left to talk about... talk until we are sick of each other, and know everything... i dont know... but you are the first person ive ever felt this serious about... and i WANT to open up to you... i WANT to tell you absolutly everything... i just need to know how... and if you could just be there to tell me everything is going to be ok, that would be amazing... because sometimes all it takes is a little reassurance and guidance... and it sometimes really hard to pour your heart and soul out to a counsler who has to hear atleast 20 other people do the same thing everyday... but i ♥ you... and nothing is going to change that... i fell for you kyle... and i fell hard...
i hate that i love you
i feel a million times better when i am around you... but i feel that i have changed you... people tell me that since we have been going out that you have changed alot... wont say who... but i feel that you prefer other things over me... i dont want to be your main focus... but i do want you to atleast... i dont know... i dont want to change you... if i say anything it will get taken the wrong way... im sorry... im really trying to make this work... but i dont know if i can... i need your help... something inside is seriously about to snap... there is so much stuff you dont know... and so much stuff that you need to know but i just dont have the balls to tell you... i feel there is so much you are hiding from me...
i found out what you were talking about earlier, when you said you needed to find someone with a car... i just dont get it... i dont even know... i was in second hour with chase today and i just sat there and cried and told him everything... i really wish it was you sitting there... but if it was you it would have been so much harder... i just dont know anymore... i really want to be able to tell you everything... but i feel like i cant open up to you... im afraid to like actually 'love' you... i need you to tell me what you want... im sick of this relationship seeming to be all about me... i NEED to know about you...
Reply
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment