Fathers Day
So todays fathers day and I wish I could have made it better for him but my brother's in Colorado and I had to work, so we did what we could do.I really want him to know that I love him and admire him so so much and there are times that I can really say that I hate him but I know that I have one of the most awesome dads in the world! I mean ESPECIALLY in the past few weeks, hes done everything in his power to make sure I'm happy. He's driving me and my friends all over South Florida when no one elses parents would even consider it. He just wants his little girl to be happy and I just want that for him. Anyways today was so sad. I think I fought back tears more than 8 times.
Because theres this guy, hes 24 and hes my parents best friends' son. I remember going to his house to have dinner countless amounts of times and this boy just fascinated me. He was 9 years older and was so mature and was drop dead gorgeous and always looked like he was having fun and I had a crush bigger than the world on him. The last time I saw him though, was probably when I was 11 years young. Until today that is. Get his story. He met this girl in his teens and they fell in love. They were having premarital relations and had a son. He's like two now. But they had another son like 3 months ago as well.They both battled drug problems, they never got married, she was mentally unstable, she always hit him and beat him up and recently she fled the state with their oldest son and abandoned him and the youngest baby.Today we went to his parents house where he was staying, for dinner. This boy that I used to hang on looked so tired so drained so unstable. It broke my heart to look at his face. It really really did and I cant explain it. Its like when his girl left, she took his everything and left him to fall. We ate dinner and during it, the baby was laying in the crib crying. His grandma picked him up and held him so that he could see his father. The baby just freaking stared into his fathers eyes and stopped crying. Everyone around the table was looking at them and was doing the normal awes. They kept saying to the father,"all he needed was to look at you" and every single time, the dad would say,"always." I sat there and fought back the tears every single time because he would not take his eyes off his baby and you knew that his baby was his everything now. You could just tell. They had maybe one of the most amazing connections I've ever seen. My heart just goes out to him so much. I cant even imagine what its like on Father's day to have just been abandoned by your wife and kid. It broke my heart into so many pieces. I'm gonna pray for him. I want things to get better because when you see someone like that, it makes you hurt too. Today after going to church and seeing him, it made me think, like i do everyday how greatful and lucky i have always been. Everything that happened today was supposed to happen. Everything. Because it brought me to this decision i have made. I've made it before but I think its right now time to grow. This time though, i want it to be mine. I dont want my parents to know about it. Its not about them. Its about me. I love you.
Because theres this guy, hes 24 and hes my parents best friends' son. I remember going to his house to have dinner countless amounts of times and this boy just fascinated me. He was 9 years older and was so mature and was drop dead gorgeous and always looked like he was having fun and I had a crush bigger than the world on him. The last time I saw him though, was probably when I was 11 years young. Until today that is. Get his story. He met this girl in his teens and they fell in love. They were having premarital relations and had a son. He's like two now. But they had another son like 3 months ago as well.They both battled drug problems, they never got married, she was mentally unstable, she always hit him and beat him up and recently she fled the state with their oldest son and abandoned him and the youngest baby.Today we went to his parents house where he was staying, for dinner. This boy that I used to hang on looked so tired so drained so unstable. It broke my heart to look at his face. It really really did and I cant explain it. Its like when his girl left, she took his everything and left him to fall. We ate dinner and during it, the baby was laying in the crib crying. His grandma picked him up and held him so that he could see his father. The baby just freaking stared into his fathers eyes and stopped crying. Everyone around the table was looking at them and was doing the normal awes. They kept saying to the father,"all he needed was to look at you" and every single time, the dad would say,"always." I sat there and fought back the tears every single time because he would not take his eyes off his baby and you knew that his baby was his everything now. You could just tell. They had maybe one of the most amazing connections I've ever seen. My heart just goes out to him so much. I cant even imagine what its like on Father's day to have just been abandoned by your wife and kid. It broke my heart into so many pieces. I'm gonna pray for him. I want things to get better because when you see someone like that, it makes you hurt too. Today after going to church and seeing him, it made me think, like i do everyday how greatful and lucky i have always been. Everything that happened today was supposed to happen. Everything. Because it brought me to this decision i have made. I've made it before but I think its right now time to grow. This time though, i want it to be mine. I dont want my parents to know about it. Its not about them. Its about me. I love you.