I Never Thought I Would - 13
Yunho | Jaejoong
Chaptered
Summary:
Kim JaeJoong and Jung YunHo was forced to marry each other for the sake of their families business..
It was not hard for Jaejoong to agree because he secretly love YunHo since High school but for Yunho - it was the opposite.. He hated Jaejoong for he was gay. The fact that Yunho was straight and has a girlfriend..
Yunho did things that Jaejoong tolerated at first, but when Yunho crossed the line; he immediately demanded for a divorce. Yunho agreed in one condition - no one will know it except the two of them..
They separated ways and lived the life they want but after two years, they have to meet again..
What will happen to them?
Thirteen
Silence - deafening silence hung around the feminine - looking man as he stood outside the office of the man he love..
Thousands of questions were running inside his brain at the moment; but only one word prevails over them - Lie. Was everything that happened for the past months were lies? Are they?
A loud, hard, repetitive thump inside his chest made him raised his hand and rested his palm lightly over the fluttering organ as he asked that question inside his mind.
His breathing turned shallow and fast, sweats started to form on his smooth, pale forehead, despite him being in a well ventilated place. The words he just heard that came out from Yunho shocked the hell out of him. He wanted to turn and runaway; running away, that was very tempting for him to do, if only his body would follow what his brain was telling them but no, he was still standing there, planted on his spot as he waited to hear the next words that would be exchange inside the huge office room. He ran away two years ago for he thought that Yunho would be happy without his presence, but he was wrong. Everything became worst with what he did, so now, he will not walk away until he knows the truth. Misunderstanding has no place with him and Yunho at the moment.
Jaejoong gently shook his head as if his thoughts would disappear with the action. He can’t convince himself that Yunho meant those words. His brows furrowed as he repeated the hurtful words inside his head..
“i don’t love him, i’m just using him for his money”.
His ex-husband’s voice was fierce and cold that made his spine shiver from the past memory on how Yunho talked to him on the first months of their marriage, yet still, the way those words were delivered showed - customary. Like Yunho was trained and used to say those words. No, he wasn’t protecting him. He was just weighing options why Yunho would say that. Why he would lie when in the past, he would just spat straight into the pretty man’s face all he was feeling may it be bad or good..
Jaejoong took a deep breath to calm his raging heart beat. He lifted the hand resting on his chest and brushed the black fringes that was sticking on his forehead..
“calm yourself Kim Jaejoong. Breath”.. He mumbled then eyed the door handle before using his right hand to touch it. He closed his eyes before turning the knob only to stop when the Yunho’s voice broke the silence inside the office.
“what? That’s what you wanted to hear right?”.. he asked, voice still cold and laced with annoyance. The feminine looking man already opened his eyes, brows furrowed as he waited for Yuri to speak..
Another silence enveloped the room, before a rough sigh was released.. Yunho stared at the woman in front of her, who was just standing there, lip pursed and he knew she will not speak soon.
“i love him, Yuri. I love Jaejoong so much. Is that so hard to understand?”.. he asked calmly. Voice sincere but serious, yet still Yuri didn’t say anything but look at him. On the other side of the door, a small smile painted the pouty lips owned by Jaejoong for what Yunho had said was enough for him to answer the entire question inside his head. When another silence occurred inside the room, he turned the knob and opened the door gently.
As Yunho heard the familiar clicked of his office door, he turned his gaze on its direction and unconsciously let out a sweet smile the moment he saw who it was. The pale-skinned man smiled back at him before bowing lightly to Yuri who’s surprised at his sudden appearance.
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Yuri watched as the man he used to hate, walked towards Yunho, fluidly. She saw how the man that loved her before smiled brightly and stood up to hug and kiss the smaller man, he held him tight like he never want to let go. She can clearly see on his almond-shaped eyes the truth, the truth that he does love Jaejoong and she felt a warm feeling inside her chest, when she heard him said i love you to the man that he had love a long time but kept on denying it.
“they’re perfect”.. she whispered inaudibly with a smile, not a bitter or mocking smile but a real one. When she noticed that the taller man was caught up on his own world by kept on hugging the struggling Jaejoong than to answer his question, she cleared her throat that caught their attention instantly.
“Yunho, i need to talk to you”.. she started when Yunho was already sitting on his office chair, left hand intertwined with Jaejoong’s right, who was standing beside him. the latter noticed that Yuri had her gaze locked at their intertwined hands. He tried to pull it but the older man wouldn’t let go.
“Yun-ah, let go. You’re going to talk. I’ll wait for you outside”.. he explained but the other stubbornly shook his head, lips formed into a cute pout as he look at him. Yuri can’t help but to smile at Yunho’s childishness that she never get to see when they were still together for years.
“it’s okay Jaejoong-shi. You can stay”.. she stated and the beautiful man nodded before looking at her. A shiver ran down her spine when she saw the cold expression of the shorter male, it was so intimidating. She looked down on the floor, fingers gripping tightly on the hem of her short, red trench coat as she thought where she should start with what she was going to say to them. Breathing deeply, she looked at the two handsome male in front her.
“Yunho”.. she started, watching their expression that didn’t even changed except for the light squeeze on their still intertwined hands that Yunho gave to Jaejoong, as if reassuring him of what she’s going to say next.
She slowly opened her mouth to continue and said, “i’m pregnant”.. she expects them to released each other’s hand but they didn’t, they held it even tighter as they look at one another, surprised etched on both faces.
“w-what are you talking about? How can you be pregnant?”.. Yunho questioned in panic, heart beat racing inside his chest. He held Jaejoong’s hand tightly as he stood up and eyed his ex-girlfriend. Despite Yunho’s nervousness and disbelief, the smaller man noticed Yuri’s calmness as she placed her left hand on her lightly bumped stomach. She radiated happiness and contentment that made the beautiful man smile at the sight.
“who’s the father?”.. he asked softly and bit his lower plump lip when the woman looked at him then to Yunho, eyes showing fear and shame.
“Donghae”.. she mumbled in a shaky voice. Her eyes were fixed on the floor as she felt her ex-boyfriend’s piercing gaze.
“i thought it was mine”.. Yunho admitted, then he sighed before smiling at the man he love, but the latter was not blind to miss the bit of disappointment shown on those chocolate brown orbs, yet still he smiled back at him before looking to Yuri.
She deep a took breath and look at the two man in front of her.. “i’m here to apologize Yunho, i didn’t mean to betray you but it happened and i didn’t regret any of it”. She stopped and a soft smile appeared on her thin lips..
“the time that you were not the same anymore, Hae was the only one who i can lean to. He made me realized that i was too much, that i was asking you for too much the fact that it was clear as the sky that you don’t need me anymore”.
“yes, need. We knew since the start that there was no love between us as lovers, possibly just friends. You’re heart was already taken even before we met” she stopped again and smiled at the confuse look of the beautiful man.
“You kept me beside you because you thought i was the perfect one, but i am not him and i never complained because you gave me what i want, what i need. And i almost realized that i do love you for real until something happened between me and Donghae”..
“i’m sorry for letting it happen behind your back, but i’m asking you not to bear any hatred towards him, it’s all my fault, i wa -“
“can you make him happy?”.. the tan-skinned man questioned, not letting her finish what she was going to say..
Yuri licked her dry lips and she swallowed. “i-i don’t know but i’ll give my best to make him happy”.. she honestly answered that was rewarded with a gentle smile from Yunho..
“that’s all i need to know. I’m happy for the two of you. Congratulations”.. he said serenely, lips still curved into a smile.
Jaejoong just smiled and bowed lightly to Yuri when she bid goodbye and left the office room. The smaller man turned to face the other who have his eyes fixed to his own then he caressed its small, handsome face, hoping to understand the cause of emotion that were still lingering on those beautiful orbs. Yunho should feel relieved that he was not the father of the child growing inside Yuri’s womb but instead of showing relief on his eyes, it shows a strong emotion of envy.
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The smaller man had no idea or even a clue where and how it started; all he was aware of was that they’re on a king size bed and Yunho’s on top of him, sucking and nipping every exposed skin of his creamy, pale neck eagerly. He threaded his slim fingers to the dark brown locks of the man hovering him, pushing his head closer to the full expanse of his neck, he wanted to feel the warmth of the older man’s lips, the burning sensation it left when he move from one spot to another. Yunho sucked harder on a spot just beneath the smaller man’s left jaw line, eliciting a sensual moan from the slightly parted pouty lips that were asking to be ravished and the older man was so willing to comply. He gave a last lick to the bright red mark he made on the pale skin before claiming the soft, pouty lips into a searing kiss. He closed his eyes when Jaejoong wrapped his thin arms around his neck as he kissed him back with the same vigour. Yunho licked the smaller man’s lower lip sensually asking for entrance that the other keenly gave by parting his slightly bruised lips. He thrust his tongue inside the sweet cavern, wanting to taste every inch of it. He moaned when he tasted a bitter-sweet flavour which he believed to be the vodka and red wine that Jaejoong consumed earlier after eating dinner.
After Yuri left them at the office, they stayed for a little while before Jaejoong complained of being hungry. They’ve decided to go to the mall and eat a 14” pizza which Jaejoong almost finish all by himself. They took a walk around the mall side by side to burn a little what they ate, and after hours of window shopping; the smaller man complained of being hungry again and pulled the older man in a newly opened Italian restaurant, located on the third floor of the mall. They were ushered to sit on a table in the middle of the cosy place but Yunho asked for a more private table, though there were only few customers dining in; so they sat on the very corner of the restaurant, too hidden for Jaejoong’s liking.
A male waiter approached them to take their orders and Yunho didn’t miss the way the server stared at the smaller man, as he bit his lower lip while in deep thought..
“we’ll order the same”.. Yunho instantly said as he pulled the menu out of Jaejoong’s hold and tossed it to the waiter that bowed at them and walked away in haste, fully aware of the older man’s annoyance.
Gorgeous doe-like eyes watched the older man as he crossed his arms against his well-built chest and slumped on his seat. Intentionally ignoring the other’s worried gaze..
“Yunnie-ah”.. Jaejoong called softly then he pouted when the other still ignored him purposely. They ate in silence when their food arrived and the younger man ordered a bottle of red wine and vodka, and even before Yunho can complain, the pretty man already pushed the now female waiter away from their table.. the taller of the two could only watch as Jaejoong hastily gulped the vodka, though he wants to drink too, he can’t, for he was the one to drive them home.
He grabbed the half full bottle of red wine that the younger man was planning to finish too. Jaejoong just looked at him intently, cheeks already flushed, not muttering any word..
“you’re a bad drunk”.. the older man complained as he stood up from his seat and walked to the smaller man’s side that was giggling non-stop.
“b-but you love me”.. he said, patting his own chest while staring at the taller man. “and i love you so so much”.. he continued, arms wrapping around the other’s neck that is assisting him to stand on his wobbly legs. Yunho held Jaejoong on his slim waist to steady him as it stood in front him, body so close to him.
“are you mad at me Yunnie?”.. he asked softly, eyes turning glassy as he stared at the taller man. The latter shook his head, cupping the smaller man’s left cheek with his right hand and he smiled when Jaejoong leaned to his touch, eyes gently closing.
“don’t sleep here, baby. Let’s go home now”.. he said softly and the other nodded. He leaned closer then kissed the pale-forehead of the angelic-looking man in his arms.
Yunho snaked his hand under the shorter man’s shirt and caressed its smooth, flat abdomen, pulling away from the kiss when he felt the man under him shuddered at his touch. He stared at its gorgeous face; cheeks blushing, lips swollen and parted and eyes hooded as he stared back at him.
“more”.. the smaller man whined that made Yunho chuckle before capturing the pouty lips for the second time, they kissed passionately while grinding to each other’s body. When the older man felt the slim fingers unbuttoning his dress shirt, he pulled away from the kiss, earning a whimper from the man underneath him but he just smiled before lying beside the now pouting man.
“you’re not sober my Joongie. I won’t take advantage of you”.. he said, pulling the smaller man closer to him that’s nodding lazily as sleep was slowly eating him up.
“sleep now, my angel”.. he softly whispered, kissing its forehead then its full lips. He didn’t wait for a reply as sleep took over him instantly when he heard soft snores coming from the beauty beside him.
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Eighteen days simply passed by like a blink. Yunho got too busy with his work as problems occurred on one of the branches of the company, he had to drive in and out of the city to fix everything and prevent the problem for worsening, leaving him no spare time to eat a proper meal or even sleep a couple of hours a day. The younger man was no different; he busied himself too by offering his editing skills to his Heechul hyung who kept on bugging him to go back to the U.S. of A., to assist him on a big project he’s currently working on. He also volunteered on helping Changmin with some data organizing and input that made the work much easier to the company.. Jaejoong busied himself inside the house just to occupy his mind to not miss and bother Yunho every minute of the day, but his patience ran thin without him noticing.
The gorgeous, fair skinned man stood up from bed, ruffling his already dishevelled hair as he walked his way to the bathroom to attend his needs and walked out after a few minutes, without even fixing his hair and changing his overly large shirt and boxers that he used as sleep wear. He lazily exited his room not forgetting to grab and wear his eyeglasses then continuously walked downstairs, deep frown etching his beautiful face for he knew Yunho has already left without bidding goodbye to him.
“that freaking bastard! I swear I’ll punch his so handsome face if I got a chance”.. he said out loud as he passed by the living room not noticing the man sitting comfortable on the couch, watching television in a low volume; already smiling with what he just heard.
“and why would you do that?”.. he asked, amusement clear on his deep, gentle voice. The smaller man halted as he heard the voice that he longed to hear for the past days. Turning on his back, his eyes widened when he saw Yunho grinning at him.
“you’re here”.. Jaejoong mumbled and even before the taller man could answer, the smaller already threw himself on his lap, burying his face on the crook of his neck, thins arms wrapped loosely around his torso, making the older man laugh loudly.
He kissed him softly on the neck before lifting his head to face the smiling taller man. “bastard”. he hissed before pressing his pouty lips to the other. Their lips move in slow but obviously needy synchronization. Jaejoong pulled away rather that opening up when Yunho licked his upper lip, they stared at each other and the latter panicked when the deep, doe-like eyes turned glassy; he cupped the smaller man’s face and pecked on its pouting lips.
“don’t cry Jae. I’m already here”.. he whispered lovingly as he hugged the him tightly. “i’d miss you too”. he admitted and the smaller man sobbed louder against his shoulders that made him smile. He never felt so much loved until now.
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They were walking in a nearby park, hands intertwined with each other as they search for a vacant bench to kill time for it was still early to go home. After lazing on the couch, hugging and teasing each other for hours, the older man decided to bring Jaejoong out, fully knowing that the other didn’t even bother to leave the house without him.
“a perfect spot”.. he muttered that made the pale skinned man giggle as they sat on a bench, under a tree. Their hands were still intertwined to each other, the smaller man’s head resting on the other’s shoulder that was preoccupied watching a 4 year old boy chasing his red ball in front of them. The younger man watched Yunho’s fond and cheery expression as he watched the boy play. Jaejoong knew that the older man love kids as much as he is to them. He was positive that he would be a perfect father and a husband.
“excuse me”. a female voice interrupted Jaejoong’s thoughts. He lifted his head to look at the pregnant woman standing beside Yunho, pointing on the empty space beside him..
“can i sit here?”.. she asked and the taller man nodded, scooting closer to the feminine looking man to give some space to the lady.
They sat there in silence; the older man was teasing the other by bumping their thumbs together on their still entwined hands, earning a bite on the shoulder by the smiling Jaejoong. Minutes later, a girl about 12 years of age approached the pregnant woman beside them.
“hi unnie”.. she greeted her but her gaze was on the two handsome men’s entangled hands, placed above Yunho’s left thigh. The latter felt the gaze so he placed their hands between them then he smiled at Jaejoong when the latter gazed at him in wonder.
The smaller man refused to be offended when Yunho pulled out his hand and scooted away from him when the girl asked the pregnant woman, who’s obviously a homophobe, a question.
“unnie, why are they holding each other’s hand? They’re both man right?”.. she asked in curiosty, eyeing the two man that made Yunho’s body to tensed up. The pregnant woman turned to look at her left and the smaller man didn’t miss the disgust look she gave them before turning back to the girl standing on her right.
“they’re just close friends. Men can’t have relationship with each other, that is just disgusting”.. she answered loudly, making sure that the two men beside her would hear.
The shorter man wanted to cry when Yunho didn’t even move closer to him when the pregnant woman and young girl left. He tried to hold his hand but he would fidget and moved away even more, mostly when people looked at them as they pass by. And what hurt the younger man the most was Yunho denied to know him when some teenage girls asked if they were together and he just stood up from his seat not bothering to wait for Jaejoong as he walked towards their car’s direction.
The moment the shorter man got inside the car, the taller man started the engine and drove in haste away from the park. The air was thick around them and deafening silence added the heavy atmosphere between them. Jaejoong kept his gaze straight on the road, while Yunho was restless as he drove, glancing from time to time with the expressionless man beside him.
He swallowed thickly before opening his mouth to start a conversation.
“Jaejo -“.
“Shut up!”.. the smaller man snapped, voice shaking with anger as he turned his head to looked outside the window. He knew he couldn’t take it any longer. How can he be so blind? Why didn’t he notice it sooner? How can he be so selfish?
The second the car halted outside their house, the smaller man hastily unbuckled his seatbelt and got off the car. He ran the moment he stepped inside the house, ignoring Yunho’s call of his name then he entered his room, closing the door forcefully creating a loud thud that echoed in the whole house and locking it afterwards. He walked slowly towards his bed as if all his strength left his body. He curled his self on the center of the bed like a child who’s lost and has no one but himself to support him. Slowly, the tears he succeeded to hold fell continuously from his gorgeous eyes, his body shook as he breath ruggedly from his chocking sobs, he hugged himself, knuckled turning white as he clutched and pull his shirt forcefully like it was going to rip any second. He wanted to shout, throw everything and punch anything he would reach but he can’t,
For he knew that nothing would change even if he died that moment, cause even if he survived and healed, he would still be a male, a male that Yunho will be ashamed to be with and nothing even near and would never be a female that will gave the son and daughter that Yunho wanted to have and a wife that he can be proud of.
that very night for the first time in his life, Jaejoong hated himself for being born as a man.