Letters and Currents
People don't know how eagerly I wait for the mail every afternoon. People around here complain about the postal service, but I think they're really efficient and they're doing the best job that they can. Everyday we receive mail: be it advertisements or promo stuff, or bills. And hey, I even received some packages of stuff I ordered from Amazon! One was the charger for the videocam that Dikong brought over here, the other is a secret. But what I really look forward to are the letters I receive from Vilma. They cheer up my day and remind me that someone else out there loves me. I wish I could buy more pasalubong for Vilma and my other friends back home, but shipping charges are a pain in the butt and, ironically, I'm a bit short on money.
Why is it so, here in the land of opportunity? It's a long story, but I guess we have all the time in the world. I think I've said this already, but anyway, we're helping Mom with her torrential unpaid bills which. I have given practically all my savings (that which is supposed to be for my thesis) to her and it is only a fraction of that amount. I had to buy my ticket back home.
At first I was really upset about this, but I realized that I was just acting selfish. Of course I had to help Mom. Never mind how she spent all that money (it's easy to spend money here in the US anyway). She still is in trouble and as her son, it's my duty to help. I guess I can always work again and earn money for my thesis again. I just can't bear working over here. Job opportunities are nice when you've graduated, but if you haven't yet, you only get to land on retail. Even dikong is having a hard time getting a job since he still doesn't have a degree or certificate or anything. But I shouldn't complain, should I. We have been given this opportunity. I tried to make the most of it as much as possible, but I really can't feel at home here yet.
Every full moon I see here I remember Vilma and my friends, and I remember how many months I've been gone. I look back and I'm surprised I survived it this far. I'm becoming a stronger person here. Like this semi-retired nurse I helped out in Home Depot said, "Ang America, land of the brave. hindi pwede ang mahihina ang loob."
In about a month I'll be back home. Who knows how long I'll be able to stay there. All I know is when I get home, I plan to make the most of my time. Who knows where the currents will draw me towards again.