fic: (You Are) Wishbones and the Axis (Firefly; River/Kaylee/Mal)
Title: (You Are) Wishbones and the Axis
Author: victoria p. [victoria @ unfitforsociety.net]
Summary: River thinks the shift to a pas de trois can be accomplished smoothly, if only Mal will cooperate.
Rating: Adult
Pairing: River/Kaylee/Mal
Disclaimer: All your characters are belong to Joss.
Notes: Thanks so much to luzdeestrellas, who was there every step of the way, to florahart for betaing, and to mousapelli, who agreed with me that it was hot. Title from Thea Gilmore.
Word count: 5,530 words
Date: June 8, 2006
~*~
(You Are) Wishbones and the Axis
River should probably feel guilty about stealing Kaylee from Simon, but she doesn't. Not when Kaylee's warm and wet beneath her, soft skin slick with saliva and sweat, hips arching up against her hand, and lips curving around soft moans that make River's head spin and her body quiver.
Kaylee comes with a full-body shudder that looks painful but isn't. River has learned how close pleasure is to pain--she's always skirting that knife-edge, knowing Kaylee won't ever take her over, won't ever hurt her. River licks her fingers, enjoying the sharp salt tang on her tongue, and thinks of the ocean, the cradle of life, her natural destination--all rivers flow to the sea, and the waves of Kaylee's pleasure lap against her mind, her skin, until she swells and aches with need.
Kaylee opens her eyes, smiles, and with a playful push, River is on her back, wide open to Kaylee's skilled fingers and hungry tongue. She closes her eyes, holds her breath, recedes into the dark, hot pulse of her own body, aware of every brush of Kaylee's hair against her belly and thighs, every warm puff of breath against her quim. Kaylee hums and River feels it vibrating through her body, blending with the rumble of the engine that turns slow and steady beside them. She's so close to breaking free, and she tries to tell Kaylee, but the words don't make any sense, just spill from her lips in breathless clauses like half-translated lines of poetry. She gasps, curls her hands in Kaylee's hair so she doesn't float away, eyes opening for a moment in desperation.
Over the curve of Kaylee's naked back, she looks up into the captain's blue, blue eyes, indigo now, like a stormy sky at twilight. She gasps again, wordlessly, the tension inside her breaking, and she can't hold his gaze, has to close her eyes to ride out the rush of release, rocking up against Kaylee's mouth.
When she opens them again, wrapped up in Kaylee's arms and still floating in the aftermath, he's gone, but the echoes of his need linger in her head and flicker against her skin, tiny flames he'd douse if he could.
Later, she catches glimpses of it in his mind, the low gold sheen of Kaylee's skin and the curve of her own moon-white leg, toes pointed and curled in pleasure--closes her eyes and actively seeks to follow his thoughts, feel what he feels as he's thinking of them, though she knows he'd be angry if he knew.
Kaylee laughs when River tells her. "He's a man," she says with a knowing grin. "Ain't a lech like Jayne, but still a man. Got needs like everyone else."
"Did you ever--" She doesn't finish the question, already knows the answer, but she also knows people like to be asked.
Kaylee shakes her head. "Used to think on it a lot, though."
"Do you still want to?"
"You and me weren't together, I wouldn't say no if the idea took his fancy." This honesty is what River likes best about Kaylee. With other people there is always the dissonance of surface and substance, between what they say and what they mean, thoughts they don't even know they're thinking rising up in the spaces between their words, but Kaylee rarely feels the need to hide, and her presence is a soothing balm to River's sometimes frazzled nerves. "You?"
River smiles, remembering his trust in her when she'd given him no good reason, the heat in his eyes as he watched her and Kaylee, quickly tamped down in anger and shame. "Yes." She leans in, gives Kaylee a quick kiss. "I think we should."
"What? River, how--"
"Three is a lucky prime, a good number. An equilateral triangle--all sides are equal," she says in response to Kaylee's questioning look, then reaches out and cups her cheek. "Triangles exist already, seven people here, someone's always odd one out. We turn it the other way, leave the jealousy and anger behind."
"I ain't saying I wouldn't go for it," Kaylee says doubtfully, and River can tell she wants to be talked into it. "But I can't see the captain agreeing. He's a little uptight about sex, 'specially with crew. Not like most men, who jump at the chance without thinking first."
"No fun if it's not a challenge." She giggles and gives Kaylee another, more lingering kiss. "I have a plan," she says, and whispers in her ear.
*
It's a dance, and River has always loved to dance. She is still learning all the steps of this particular pas de deux, but she thinks in this case, the shift to a pas de trois can be accomplished smoothly, if only Mal will cooperate.
Of course, like everything to do with Mal, there are more than a few complications, and smooth is a relative concept. River is flexible, though, and adjusts accordingly.
After the second time he interrupts them in the engine room--Kaylee's legs hooked over River's shoulders, River licking and sucking at quim and clit, salt-slick heat against her tongue, while Kaylee begs incoherently for more--he stops coming by in person, starts using the intercom to yell when he needs one or the other of them.
River knows he's close to breaking the night he walks in on them in the kitchen. She has Kaylee pressed up against the wall, shirt rucked up and bra pulled down so she can lick and suck at her breasts, nipples sweet and swollen like ripe berries on her tongue. Her own loose trousers are on the floor, while Kaylee's fingers slide inside her, play with her clit, rubbing and stroking, 'til River feels like she's vibrating at such high frequency that her whole body is going to melt and she'll be nothing but light dancing in the air.
Kaylee grins and arches when she hears his footsteps on the decking. "Want a taste?" she asks, slowly sliding glistening fingers in and out of her mouth.
"We're happy to share," River calls out as he turns and flees, muttering curses under his breath.
He's as strong-willed as she is, and his shame over wanting what they're offering stiffens his resolve even as they keep adding to the repertoire of images he plays back in his head when he's alone in his bunk. But she can feel the cracks in his resistance now, see the way he shifts, nostrils flaring, when she comes onto the bridge, loose-limbed and languorous, smelling of sex and Kaylee.
"You sure you're okay with this?" Kaylee asks her each time, and she realizes it's more than just a game, that despite Kaylee's naughty grin and willing attitude, Kaylee loves Mal in a way she thinks might hurt River, and has for a long time. She doesn't say anything--she doesn't have to--but River understands. She feels the same.
"Not like Inara's books," she says, meaning the overwrought novels Inara keeps hidden in her shuttle, a secret cache of fantasy romance the life of a Companion doesn't actually bring her. Inara shares with them sometimes--girlish things to make River feel more like a real girl when she was still putting herself back together. But those stories always require a choice, and River doesn't want to make one. Doesn't even understand why they should have to. "No tearing apart. Only coming together."
She kisses Kaylee's doubts away, tells her not to worry. Tells Mal the same thing.
"It's love," she says, remembering the first time she flew beside him, knowing he is, too. "It should be enough." He knows he's losing ground and she tries to tell him he's thinking about it all wrong. "A dance, not a battle. Only winners, moving together in time; no losers, unless you keep fighting for no reason."
But he doesn't listen. He skitters away, eyes rolling white and ears set back like a spooked horse. She can't make him understand. He has to work it out for himself.
Of course, that doesn't mean she won't try to help him along, show him how good it could be, if only he'd let himself fall.
A few nights later, she wakes breathless and aching from a dream that isn't hers. She sleeps better now, curled up in Kaylee's arms, but he's so close, only a thin wall between them, membrane-like, and by osmosis she can hear him tossing and turning, tormented not by the dreams of death that used to wake her screaming, but by images of her, of Kaylee, all the things he wants and won't let himself have. They can bring him the peace he needs but has given up hoping for, for a few hours at least (and longer if they have their way), if he lets them. For the first time, he's started wondering why he shouldn't take what they're offering, instead of why he should.
"Come on," she whispers to Kaylee, waking her with kisses. "It's time."
Kaylee's eyes widen. "You sure?"
"Hour of the wolf. Keep the howling loneliness from the door."
It's a few moments' work to slip up the ladder out of Kaylee's bunk and down into Mal's. His door isn't locked against them--she wouldn't force it if it were, and the fact that he could lock it but doesn't is encouraging. He's dozing now, restlessly grazing the surface of sleep.
His bed is barely big enough for two, let alone three, but she and Kaylee are small--they flow around him like water, sliding against bare skin lightly covered with hair.
He starts awake, confused at first. "What the--"
River stops his mouth with hers, tongues trading sleep for wakefulness. Kaylee slips her arms around him from behind, hands stroking slow and easy along his bare chest and belly, fingers tracing the ridges of his scars--so many scars on all of them, on Serenity herself, knitting them closer together as they heal.
"Wode tìan!" he gasps when she pulls back. "We can't--" He grabs at Kaylee's hands and she stills under his touch, looking to River for direction.
"We can," River says. "We will, if you let us."
"It's wrong," he says, closing his eyes and swallowing hard as Kaylee presses kisses to his jaw.
"It's really not," she says, whisper-soft in his ear, sliding her hands up again, taking his with them, to circle his nipples, which peak under her touch. Then she takes one of his hands and draws it behind him. He moans low as she touches herself with his fingers.
"Not taking advantage," River says, her hands settling on his hipbones, flared like wings under his skin, thumbs stroking the line of them, enjoying the way his body responds to the touch. "Giving it. Sharing it. Good for the captain, good for the ship."
"Nobody's getting hurt," Kaylee adds, bringing their joined hands back up and rubbing her damp thumb along his lower lip when he opens his mouth to argue. "We love you and you love us. How can it be wrong? And there ain't nobody who knows any of us'll think you ever in a million years forced us into anything, if that's what you're worried about." She gives a small laugh. "Nobody makes River do what she don't want to. Don't you know that by now?"
His voice is low and hoarse when he says, "I surely do. But--"
River leans in to lick the taste of Kaylee off Mal's lips, slip her tongue into his mouth again, and this time, he kisses back, tongue sliding against hers, sending heat shivering down her spine.
"No promises," Kaylee continues, though her hope burns as brightly as her desire, and River wishes Mal could see that the way she can. "No having and holding 'cept this, unless you want it."
River reaches out, takes their joined hands in hers now, presses them to her chest, then to the wall, letting Serenity's hum vibrate through them, perfect music for this dance. "Purr like Serenity under your hands," she says, "hands and heart and soul joined together." She lets go, leans over him to kiss Kaylee, and when she feels his hand shift to cup her breast, thumb slipping over her peaked nipple through the flimsy material of her nightgown, she knows he's come around.
"I'm going to the special hell," he murmurs, and Kaylee giggles.
"No such thing," River says. "Only hell is the one we make. None here tonight. Only heaven." She touches his cheek gently, concentrating on the logistics of three people in one small bunk while she still can.
Kaylee sits up, pulls her shirt off, and tosses it to the floor with a soft smile, and Mal turns to her, wonder in his eyes. He cups her face and draws her close for a kiss. River closes her eyes and feels. Kaylee kisses with her whole body, her whole soul, suffused with joy, and River loves that. She wants Mal to love it--to feel it--too.
"Pretty Kaylee," he says when he pulls back, his voice low and hoarse.
"Shiny, Cap'n," she answers, nipping at his lower lip. She pushes him down onto his back and lies on her side next to him, back to the wall. She takes her time kissing him, her hands moving over his chest and then up to stroke his jaw tenderly.
River hopes he realizes what Kaylee's telling him with her kisses. In case he doesn't, she slides down to lie beside him, balancing carefully on the edge of the bed--always aware of how close she is to falling and how they'll catch her if she does--and begins whispering in his ear, Let us love you. Let us take care of you the way you take care of us. Same love that keeps Serenity in the air holds us together here--strongest force in the 'verse.
Kaylee looks up at her, eyes and lips shining in the dim light. "Listen to the crazy genius girl," she says, running her fingers over Mal's face. "She's smarter than you are." River beams at her and Kaylee reaches over and cups the back of River's head, draws her close for a kiss, hot and sweet and full of promise.
Mal groans low, sliding his arm beneath her, around her, and she can feel his warm, strong hand splayed against her back.
"I must be dreaming," he says when River moves from kissing Kaylee to kissing his temple, his cheek, his jaw, soft licks and little nips, learning the taste and texture of his skin.
"No," she says. "Awake for the first time in years." And then she kisses his mouth again, more demanding this time, leaving them both breathless when she pulls away.
Kaylee rubs against him like a cat begging to be petted, one of her legs moving between his, and when River looks down, she sees the pink tip of Kaylee's tongue licking at his nipple.
"River," she says when she realizes River is looking at her, "take off your nightie."
River slips it over her head and drops it to the floor, same as Kaylee did with hers, her body warming under the heat of their stares, desire swimming quick in her veins.
"Ain't she pretty?" Kaylee says.
"She surely is." He gives them both a long once-over, that look of wonder still in his eyes. "So are you, Kaylee. So are you." He strokes the underside of River's breast. He closes his eyes for a brief moment, thankful. "I'm a lucky, lucky man."
"You really, really are," Kaylee says, giggling, and he laughs as well, kisses the tip of her nose, and it feels natural, right, so River laughs too, because this is what she's wanted, planned for, for a while now, and it's finally happening.
She leans in, happy to share their laughter, and gasps as they each take one of her nipples into their mouths. Kaylee's hand on her shoulder steadies her as lightning strikes of need jolt through her body and wet heat slicks the now-aching flesh between her thighs. Then Mal starts pressing kisses to her breast, to her chest, lingering for a moment over her heart. His tongue meets Kaylee's around her nipple and she lets her head drop forward and moans, or maybe Kaylee does--River can't tell anymore, because now she can feel everything they feel, as if they're all connected, their tongues on her nipple, Mal's hand sliding between Kaylee's thighs, the fine silk of Mal's hair tickling her palm as she runs her fingers through it.
Kaylee draws his hand up again, slides one long, slick finger into her mouth, and he moans; it tickles River's skin, sends another wave of heat skittering over it, and she's not prepared when his fingers slip between her legs, bigger than Kaylee's, callused in different places from years of handling guns and reins and all manner of trouble life's handed him.
She loses her balance for just a second, hanging off the edge waiting to fall, and they catch her, Mal's hands around her waist, Kaylee's on her shoulder and arm. They ease her to the floor and follow, petting her gently. She's pleased that Mal has settled in, accepted that this is the way of things, at least for tonight.
"Safer down here," Kaylee says, kissing her cheek. Through the sturdy, ugly carpeting, River feels Serenity hum in agreement against her back, in her blood.
Mal smiles, makes her heart swell with gladness beyond fleshly pleasure they've been sharing. "More room to spread your wings, little albatross," he murmurs against her hair, hands sliding over the curve of her hips, down the length of her thighs, making her quiver with need.
"I think you should fuck me now," she answers, arching up under his touch.
He blinks at her plain speaking, shakes his head, and laughs hoarsely. "Tāmāde. The things you say." He looks at Kaylee. "You sure 'bout this, Kaylee?"
Kaylee's already sliding her hands beneath the waistband of his sleep pants. "Wouldn't be here if I weren't, Cap'n. Want to share with you. " He kisses her softly, slowly, as she undresses him, his hands gliding over her body, arms and hips and breasts, like he's trying to memorize her, and she returns each touch, before her hands come to rest sure and steady over his heart, the true engine that keeps them all flying. River watches them, fingers sliding against her own slick flesh, breathless with anticipation.
Kaylee gives him one more kiss, pats his pìgǔ with a saucy grin, and lies down on her side next to River, propping herself up on one elbow. She leans in and gives River a kiss, and River can taste hot need beneath the tenderness, banked now, waiting to kindle. She feels Mal's hands on her feet, thumbs circling over her ankles before sliding up over her calves, slow, warm, sure, no hesitation in him now that he's made his decision, set his course. He follows his hands with his mouth, kisses and licks up her legs, behind her knees, making her giggle--slow exploration of new territory that's always been off-limits, suddenly his for the taking. Kaylee alternates between watching him, heat in her eyes, and touching River herself, palming her breasts, smoothing over her collarbones, giving her long, slow, deep kisses that make her feel like she's floating.
She shivers when Mal reaches the sensitive skin of her inner thighs, pushes up into his hand when he brushes lightly over her quim, fingers dipping in to tease her.
"Mal? Please?" Her voice is high and needy, like the lonely cry of the albatross he's named her.
"Have to be made of stone to resist you," he murmurs, finally settling between her spread legs and pushing slowly inside her until she surrounds him. She doesn't point out that rivers always wear down stone.
She wraps her arms around him, sliding her hands over his shoulders--fingers drifting over freckles she didn't know he had but which she now wants to kiss one by one--and down his back, closing her eyes and feeling the shift and play of firm muscle beneath supple skin as he thrusts, delicious pressure spiraling high and tight inside her, stealing thought and breath away. She twines her legs around his, meeting each thrust with one of her own, wanting to feel every inch of his body, inside and out, and wanting him to feel hers the same way.
Kaylee hovers on the edges of her awareness, touching herself languidly as she watches, glowing with love and joy. Mal murmurs softly to her as they move together, but the wild roar of her own pulse drowns out his words. Doesn't matter--she can hear them sweet as birdsong in her head, beautiful and precious and good, so good, and the darker echo of guilt still clinging to the edges of his pleasure.
He slides a hand between their bodies, circles his thumb over her clit, and the tension in her finally breaks. Her body clenches around him, nearly drowning her in the fierce pulse of pleasure, and then she's flying free, broken and made whole by this dissolution. She tries to speak, to tell them how good she feels right now, and chokes on the words, only able to voice low, gasping cries. He holds her close, still driving into the tight embrace of her body as he shudders to his own release, his lips against her temple, breath hot and moist on her skin.
She drifts for a few long moments, riding out the aftershocks, and then he kisses her gently and rolls away. She opens her eyes, ready to protest, but Kaylee is leaning over her, smoothing damp hair off her forehead and kissing her tenderly.
"You okay?" Kaylee asks.
River grins and stretches like a cat, feeling as if all her bones are made of water. "Yes."
"Let's get you cleaned up, then."
Kaylee takes care of her--Kaylee's so good at taking care of her, sometimes it makes her want to cry from happiness--with a warm, wet washcloth and gentle hands, and by the time she's done, River's riding the wave of another orgasm, deeper and slower. It's making her sleepy, the low drone of the engines through the floor a lullaby. Only the buzz of Kaylee's barely satisfied desire humming beneath her skin keeps her awake.
With a smile and a kiss, Kaylee moves on to Mal, who's sitting against his bunk with his knees drawn up, hands clasped between them, still wrestling with his guilt even as he watched--and enjoyed watching--her with River. He should be used to her care, at least, but isn't yet. He protests, reaching for the washcloth.
"Can do it my own self. Ain't right for you to--"
Kaylee kneels in front of him, puts her hands on her hips. "You just hush now and let me do for you. Ain't a question of right and wrong. Just need and want. You need and I want, dong ma?" He mutters something about gorram spoiled women always having their way, and she says, "You're damn right I'm gonna have my way with you, Malcolm Reynolds. Been waiting on a chance for years. Not gonna pass it up now."
They both flush and look away at that. River knows Kaylee didn't mean to let that slip, but she can't help it. Truth flows from her--lies don't stand a chance in her presence. River clings to that sometimes when the nightmares come and she can't tell if she's dreaming or awake. Kaylee always shows her the truth, and she's going to do the same for Mal now.
"I'd've known that," he answers, his voice low, mind turning to dead ends and missed opportunities, "maybe the chance would've come sooner."
Kaylee lights up again, old anxiety laid to rest, and says, "Well, now you do," and sets about to do what needs doing.
River sighs with the rightness of it, all steps in time with the music only she can hear, and rolls onto her side to watch as Kaylee takes care of him. She's not jealous--doesn't understand how she could be, since Kaylee and Serenity both were Mal's first, and she was Simon's before she was Kaylee's or Mal's. Now they all belong to each other, and being upset about what came before takes energy away from things they could be doing now.
"Past is gone," she says softly, "and can't be changed. Need to let it rest and see to what can be." She smiles as she watches Kaylee coax Mal to hardness again, continuing with teasing hands and soft mouth after she's done with the washcloth. He sighs and twists under her touch, running his fingers through her hair. River smiles approvingly. "Your refractory period is shorter than expected," she says. "We appreciate that."
He chokes out a laugh and repeats, "The things you say."
She reaches out and runs a hand down Kaylee's back, feeling her quiver at the touch. "Kaylee's been very patient, but it's time you made her come."
Mal takes Kaylee's hand, brings it to his lips, then pulls her into his lap. "I agree."
Kaylee laughs and tosses her head. "You up for it?"
"I am now," he growls playfully, sliding a hand up her neck and into her hair so he can draw her in for a kiss, while his other hand skates over the sleek arch of her back, the soft curve of her bottom. She shifts, setting her knees on the floor to cradle his thighs, and rises up, one hand on his shoulder for leverage, the other guiding him inside her.
River sits up to watch--Mal's hands are splayed against Kaylee's lower back as she arches into him, loose and easy, but still in control. He licks and sucks at her breasts as she moves up and down, two-stroke piston in a beautiful engine, her hands clutching at his shoulders, tangling in his hair. They are rougher with each other than either has been with River, more familiar with this dance than she is, even if they've never danced with each other before, though they still have the easy playfulness River used to long for, before they shared it with her.
Now, she kneels up behind Kaylee and wraps her arms around her, one hand stroking down to find her clit and circle there, making Kaylee's head fall back against her shoulder, the other moving up to pinch at first one peaked nipple, then the other, earning her a stuttering gasp that rekindles the hot pulse between her thighs.
Kaylee keeps making those soft, gasping noises, and in perfect counterpoint, Mal answers with a steady stream of words, his voice hoarse and low and thrilling. "Just like that, darlin'." His voice breaks a little. "Fuck, Kaylee." He moves a hand between them, and River slides her fingers around his, holding Kaylee open to his touch, other hand slipping down to touch herself now, wet and aching for release again. His left hand moves down to clutch at Kaylee's hip, holding her steady, the way his gaze holds River now, making sure she knows he's loving her too, even when he's not touching her.
His intensity makes her feel like she's burning up from the inside out. It's too much--River closes her eyes, lets the sensation wash over her, mingling with her memories of them both touching her as she touches herself. Her eyes snap open when he says, "Come on, Kaylee. Come for me." She can see the flash of his teeth against the fluttering pulse in Kaylee's throat, and then his tongue soothing the sting away, and knows he's marked her. As he pushes forward to kiss her as well, both of them urged on by Kaylee's moans, River wonders what marks they've left on him, hopes they're ones he won't mind wearing, badges of honor instead of scars.
Kaylee stiffens for a moment in their arms, and lets out a low, choked moan before Mal kisses her again, swallowing the sounds as she comes, shuddering, in his arms, and he follows, held tight in her embrace.
River, caught in their gravitational field, lets the bright white spark and glow of their pleasure pull her along. She pulses like a soft gamma repeater when she comes, floating in the black. Kaylee rests her head in the crook of Mal's neck and River slumps forward, pressed up against Kaylee. Mal's hands come to rest on the small of her back, cradling them both, completing the circuit.
They stay like that for endless moments, close as people can be, and River knows this is the way they're meant to be, uplifted, wings unfurled to fly, then curled up to hold close what's dear.
The soreness between her thighs finally makes her move, and Mal and Kaylee slowly uncouple, Mal's eyes heavy-lidded and Kaylee's body heavy-limbed from satisfaction. River curls up on her side to watch them, sleepy and sated, whispering together as they clean up, soft things they've always said with actions instead of words. River smiles to hear it, because sometimes people need to say the words even if they already have the truth carved into their bones. Then Kaylee reaches out for her, draws her back into the circle of their arms, warm and easy, right where she belongs.
"Our girl," she whispers in the same awed, loving tone she uses when they've just pushed Serenity to her limits and she's come through with flying colors, lips ghosting over River's cheek, "our beautiful girl."
"Beautiful girls," Mal says as he pulls the blankets and pillows off the bed and then drops a kiss on the top of Kaylee's head. She and River make a little nest on the floor and curl up around him like kittens ready to sleep. He puts an arm around each of them, but River can already feel his worries returning, mind clamoring with questions of propriety, belonging.
"Not hers or mine or yours," she murmurs, yawning. "Ours."
"You two--"
"Three, with you," she corrects him gently. "Three is a good number. Lucky."
He sighs, breath warm against her hair. "Three don't work in things like this, little albatross. Always somebody feeling left out. Like a triangle, everybody always reaching for the point they can't have."
"Worked tonight." She reaches out and twines her fingers with Kaylee's, lays their clasped hands over his heart.
"I ain't saying tonight wasn't one of the best nights of my life, 'cause I'd be lying if I did. Kind of night a man'd have to be in the ground three days not to enjoy, but--"
"River says there's a triangle that's equal on all sides," Kaylee interrupts before he can start tying himself back up into the knots they've just loosened. "Could be like that."
River nods. "Love can't be quantified," she says. "Can't be contained, controlled. The more we give, the more we have, making us whole, greater than the sum of our parts. Wings unfurled and flying."
"But we ain't gonna fly right if we don't got all the parts," Kaylee says, pressing a kiss to his shoulder.
"Seems to me you two've been flying just fine without me interfering."
"Yeah, but it ain't right for us to be flying if you're still kissing dirt," Kaylee answers in a low voice, thinking of past hurts just recently begun healing. River tries to tell him this without words--brushes his hair back off his forehead, runs her fingers lightly over his face, feeling the strength of his bones beneath his skin, secret wishes writ in every one, wishes they can answer if he lets them.
His face takes on a mulish cast. "Don't need your pity."
River rolls her eyes. "Nĭ shì bái chī. Don't be insulting."
Kaylee shrugs a shoulder, tries to act like his resistance isn't bruising her already. "You don't feel the same, we've had our bit of fun, never bother you with it again. But if you think we're something you want, but you're too ashamed to say so...." She shakes her head. "Ain't nothing but hurt all around, then."
"Tāmāde. Ain't a question of want or need," he says, reversing Kaylee's earlier words. "It's about what's right or wrong."
"Ain't nothing wrong with people loving each other of their own free will," Kaylee argues before River can say anything. "You know it same as I do, Mal."
"Same love that keeps Serenity in the air. No shame in wanting that, or in having it," River adds. "Shame would be not taking it when we offer." She rests her head on his chest, feeling the yearning in him, the desire to relax and give in, though he's struggling with it still.
"Like Serenity, huh?"
"Like Serenity," River repeats firmly, gently, knowing no finely honed scruple or argument can stand against that. "Treat us proper, we'll be with you the rest of your life."
He sighs, yielding. For tonight, it is enough.
end
***
Feedback would be awesome.
***
Author: victoria p. [victoria @ unfitforsociety.net]
Summary: River thinks the shift to a pas de trois can be accomplished smoothly, if only Mal will cooperate.
Rating: Adult
Pairing: River/Kaylee/Mal
Disclaimer: All your characters are belong to Joss.
Notes: Thanks so much to luzdeestrellas, who was there every step of the way, to florahart for betaing, and to mousapelli, who agreed with me that it was hot. Title from Thea Gilmore.
Word count: 5,530 words
Date: June 8, 2006
~*~
(You Are) Wishbones and the Axis
River should probably feel guilty about stealing Kaylee from Simon, but she doesn't. Not when Kaylee's warm and wet beneath her, soft skin slick with saliva and sweat, hips arching up against her hand, and lips curving around soft moans that make River's head spin and her body quiver.
Kaylee comes with a full-body shudder that looks painful but isn't. River has learned how close pleasure is to pain--she's always skirting that knife-edge, knowing Kaylee won't ever take her over, won't ever hurt her. River licks her fingers, enjoying the sharp salt tang on her tongue, and thinks of the ocean, the cradle of life, her natural destination--all rivers flow to the sea, and the waves of Kaylee's pleasure lap against her mind, her skin, until she swells and aches with need.
Kaylee opens her eyes, smiles, and with a playful push, River is on her back, wide open to Kaylee's skilled fingers and hungry tongue. She closes her eyes, holds her breath, recedes into the dark, hot pulse of her own body, aware of every brush of Kaylee's hair against her belly and thighs, every warm puff of breath against her quim. Kaylee hums and River feels it vibrating through her body, blending with the rumble of the engine that turns slow and steady beside them. She's so close to breaking free, and she tries to tell Kaylee, but the words don't make any sense, just spill from her lips in breathless clauses like half-translated lines of poetry. She gasps, curls her hands in Kaylee's hair so she doesn't float away, eyes opening for a moment in desperation.
Over the curve of Kaylee's naked back, she looks up into the captain's blue, blue eyes, indigo now, like a stormy sky at twilight. She gasps again, wordlessly, the tension inside her breaking, and she can't hold his gaze, has to close her eyes to ride out the rush of release, rocking up against Kaylee's mouth.
When she opens them again, wrapped up in Kaylee's arms and still floating in the aftermath, he's gone, but the echoes of his need linger in her head and flicker against her skin, tiny flames he'd douse if he could.
Later, she catches glimpses of it in his mind, the low gold sheen of Kaylee's skin and the curve of her own moon-white leg, toes pointed and curled in pleasure--closes her eyes and actively seeks to follow his thoughts, feel what he feels as he's thinking of them, though she knows he'd be angry if he knew.
Kaylee laughs when River tells her. "He's a man," she says with a knowing grin. "Ain't a lech like Jayne, but still a man. Got needs like everyone else."
"Did you ever--" She doesn't finish the question, already knows the answer, but she also knows people like to be asked.
Kaylee shakes her head. "Used to think on it a lot, though."
"Do you still want to?"
"You and me weren't together, I wouldn't say no if the idea took his fancy." This honesty is what River likes best about Kaylee. With other people there is always the dissonance of surface and substance, between what they say and what they mean, thoughts they don't even know they're thinking rising up in the spaces between their words, but Kaylee rarely feels the need to hide, and her presence is a soothing balm to River's sometimes frazzled nerves. "You?"
River smiles, remembering his trust in her when she'd given him no good reason, the heat in his eyes as he watched her and Kaylee, quickly tamped down in anger and shame. "Yes." She leans in, gives Kaylee a quick kiss. "I think we should."
"What? River, how--"
"Three is a lucky prime, a good number. An equilateral triangle--all sides are equal," she says in response to Kaylee's questioning look, then reaches out and cups her cheek. "Triangles exist already, seven people here, someone's always odd one out. We turn it the other way, leave the jealousy and anger behind."
"I ain't saying I wouldn't go for it," Kaylee says doubtfully, and River can tell she wants to be talked into it. "But I can't see the captain agreeing. He's a little uptight about sex, 'specially with crew. Not like most men, who jump at the chance without thinking first."
"No fun if it's not a challenge." She giggles and gives Kaylee another, more lingering kiss. "I have a plan," she says, and whispers in her ear.
*
It's a dance, and River has always loved to dance. She is still learning all the steps of this particular pas de deux, but she thinks in this case, the shift to a pas de trois can be accomplished smoothly, if only Mal will cooperate.
Of course, like everything to do with Mal, there are more than a few complications, and smooth is a relative concept. River is flexible, though, and adjusts accordingly.
After the second time he interrupts them in the engine room--Kaylee's legs hooked over River's shoulders, River licking and sucking at quim and clit, salt-slick heat against her tongue, while Kaylee begs incoherently for more--he stops coming by in person, starts using the intercom to yell when he needs one or the other of them.
River knows he's close to breaking the night he walks in on them in the kitchen. She has Kaylee pressed up against the wall, shirt rucked up and bra pulled down so she can lick and suck at her breasts, nipples sweet and swollen like ripe berries on her tongue. Her own loose trousers are on the floor, while Kaylee's fingers slide inside her, play with her clit, rubbing and stroking, 'til River feels like she's vibrating at such high frequency that her whole body is going to melt and she'll be nothing but light dancing in the air.
Kaylee grins and arches when she hears his footsteps on the decking. "Want a taste?" she asks, slowly sliding glistening fingers in and out of her mouth.
"We're happy to share," River calls out as he turns and flees, muttering curses under his breath.
He's as strong-willed as she is, and his shame over wanting what they're offering stiffens his resolve even as they keep adding to the repertoire of images he plays back in his head when he's alone in his bunk. But she can feel the cracks in his resistance now, see the way he shifts, nostrils flaring, when she comes onto the bridge, loose-limbed and languorous, smelling of sex and Kaylee.
"You sure you're okay with this?" Kaylee asks her each time, and she realizes it's more than just a game, that despite Kaylee's naughty grin and willing attitude, Kaylee loves Mal in a way she thinks might hurt River, and has for a long time. She doesn't say anything--she doesn't have to--but River understands. She feels the same.
"Not like Inara's books," she says, meaning the overwrought novels Inara keeps hidden in her shuttle, a secret cache of fantasy romance the life of a Companion doesn't actually bring her. Inara shares with them sometimes--girlish things to make River feel more like a real girl when she was still putting herself back together. But those stories always require a choice, and River doesn't want to make one. Doesn't even understand why they should have to. "No tearing apart. Only coming together."
She kisses Kaylee's doubts away, tells her not to worry. Tells Mal the same thing.
"It's love," she says, remembering the first time she flew beside him, knowing he is, too. "It should be enough." He knows he's losing ground and she tries to tell him he's thinking about it all wrong. "A dance, not a battle. Only winners, moving together in time; no losers, unless you keep fighting for no reason."
But he doesn't listen. He skitters away, eyes rolling white and ears set back like a spooked horse. She can't make him understand. He has to work it out for himself.
Of course, that doesn't mean she won't try to help him along, show him how good it could be, if only he'd let himself fall.
A few nights later, she wakes breathless and aching from a dream that isn't hers. She sleeps better now, curled up in Kaylee's arms, but he's so close, only a thin wall between them, membrane-like, and by osmosis she can hear him tossing and turning, tormented not by the dreams of death that used to wake her screaming, but by images of her, of Kaylee, all the things he wants and won't let himself have. They can bring him the peace he needs but has given up hoping for, for a few hours at least (and longer if they have their way), if he lets them. For the first time, he's started wondering why he shouldn't take what they're offering, instead of why he should.
"Come on," she whispers to Kaylee, waking her with kisses. "It's time."
Kaylee's eyes widen. "You sure?"
"Hour of the wolf. Keep the howling loneliness from the door."
It's a few moments' work to slip up the ladder out of Kaylee's bunk and down into Mal's. His door isn't locked against them--she wouldn't force it if it were, and the fact that he could lock it but doesn't is encouraging. He's dozing now, restlessly grazing the surface of sleep.
His bed is barely big enough for two, let alone three, but she and Kaylee are small--they flow around him like water, sliding against bare skin lightly covered with hair.
He starts awake, confused at first. "What the--"
River stops his mouth with hers, tongues trading sleep for wakefulness. Kaylee slips her arms around him from behind, hands stroking slow and easy along his bare chest and belly, fingers tracing the ridges of his scars--so many scars on all of them, on Serenity herself, knitting them closer together as they heal.
"Wode tìan!" he gasps when she pulls back. "We can't--" He grabs at Kaylee's hands and she stills under his touch, looking to River for direction.
"We can," River says. "We will, if you let us."
"It's wrong," he says, closing his eyes and swallowing hard as Kaylee presses kisses to his jaw.
"It's really not," she says, whisper-soft in his ear, sliding her hands up again, taking his with them, to circle his nipples, which peak under her touch. Then she takes one of his hands and draws it behind him. He moans low as she touches herself with his fingers.
"Not taking advantage," River says, her hands settling on his hipbones, flared like wings under his skin, thumbs stroking the line of them, enjoying the way his body responds to the touch. "Giving it. Sharing it. Good for the captain, good for the ship."
"Nobody's getting hurt," Kaylee adds, bringing their joined hands back up and rubbing her damp thumb along his lower lip when he opens his mouth to argue. "We love you and you love us. How can it be wrong? And there ain't nobody who knows any of us'll think you ever in a million years forced us into anything, if that's what you're worried about." She gives a small laugh. "Nobody makes River do what she don't want to. Don't you know that by now?"
His voice is low and hoarse when he says, "I surely do. But--"
River leans in to lick the taste of Kaylee off Mal's lips, slip her tongue into his mouth again, and this time, he kisses back, tongue sliding against hers, sending heat shivering down her spine.
"No promises," Kaylee continues, though her hope burns as brightly as her desire, and River wishes Mal could see that the way she can. "No having and holding 'cept this, unless you want it."
River reaches out, takes their joined hands in hers now, presses them to her chest, then to the wall, letting Serenity's hum vibrate through them, perfect music for this dance. "Purr like Serenity under your hands," she says, "hands and heart and soul joined together." She lets go, leans over him to kiss Kaylee, and when she feels his hand shift to cup her breast, thumb slipping over her peaked nipple through the flimsy material of her nightgown, she knows he's come around.
"I'm going to the special hell," he murmurs, and Kaylee giggles.
"No such thing," River says. "Only hell is the one we make. None here tonight. Only heaven." She touches his cheek gently, concentrating on the logistics of three people in one small bunk while she still can.
Kaylee sits up, pulls her shirt off, and tosses it to the floor with a soft smile, and Mal turns to her, wonder in his eyes. He cups her face and draws her close for a kiss. River closes her eyes and feels. Kaylee kisses with her whole body, her whole soul, suffused with joy, and River loves that. She wants Mal to love it--to feel it--too.
"Pretty Kaylee," he says when he pulls back, his voice low and hoarse.
"Shiny, Cap'n," she answers, nipping at his lower lip. She pushes him down onto his back and lies on her side next to him, back to the wall. She takes her time kissing him, her hands moving over his chest and then up to stroke his jaw tenderly.
River hopes he realizes what Kaylee's telling him with her kisses. In case he doesn't, she slides down to lie beside him, balancing carefully on the edge of the bed--always aware of how close she is to falling and how they'll catch her if she does--and begins whispering in his ear, Let us love you. Let us take care of you the way you take care of us. Same love that keeps Serenity in the air holds us together here--strongest force in the 'verse.
Kaylee looks up at her, eyes and lips shining in the dim light. "Listen to the crazy genius girl," she says, running her fingers over Mal's face. "She's smarter than you are." River beams at her and Kaylee reaches over and cups the back of River's head, draws her close for a kiss, hot and sweet and full of promise.
Mal groans low, sliding his arm beneath her, around her, and she can feel his warm, strong hand splayed against her back.
"I must be dreaming," he says when River moves from kissing Kaylee to kissing his temple, his cheek, his jaw, soft licks and little nips, learning the taste and texture of his skin.
"No," she says. "Awake for the first time in years." And then she kisses his mouth again, more demanding this time, leaving them both breathless when she pulls away.
Kaylee rubs against him like a cat begging to be petted, one of her legs moving between his, and when River looks down, she sees the pink tip of Kaylee's tongue licking at his nipple.
"River," she says when she realizes River is looking at her, "take off your nightie."
River slips it over her head and drops it to the floor, same as Kaylee did with hers, her body warming under the heat of their stares, desire swimming quick in her veins.
"Ain't she pretty?" Kaylee says.
"She surely is." He gives them both a long once-over, that look of wonder still in his eyes. "So are you, Kaylee. So are you." He strokes the underside of River's breast. He closes his eyes for a brief moment, thankful. "I'm a lucky, lucky man."
"You really, really are," Kaylee says, giggling, and he laughs as well, kisses the tip of her nose, and it feels natural, right, so River laughs too, because this is what she's wanted, planned for, for a while now, and it's finally happening.
She leans in, happy to share their laughter, and gasps as they each take one of her nipples into their mouths. Kaylee's hand on her shoulder steadies her as lightning strikes of need jolt through her body and wet heat slicks the now-aching flesh between her thighs. Then Mal starts pressing kisses to her breast, to her chest, lingering for a moment over her heart. His tongue meets Kaylee's around her nipple and she lets her head drop forward and moans, or maybe Kaylee does--River can't tell anymore, because now she can feel everything they feel, as if they're all connected, their tongues on her nipple, Mal's hand sliding between Kaylee's thighs, the fine silk of Mal's hair tickling her palm as she runs her fingers through it.
Kaylee draws his hand up again, slides one long, slick finger into her mouth, and he moans; it tickles River's skin, sends another wave of heat skittering over it, and she's not prepared when his fingers slip between her legs, bigger than Kaylee's, callused in different places from years of handling guns and reins and all manner of trouble life's handed him.
She loses her balance for just a second, hanging off the edge waiting to fall, and they catch her, Mal's hands around her waist, Kaylee's on her shoulder and arm. They ease her to the floor and follow, petting her gently. She's pleased that Mal has settled in, accepted that this is the way of things, at least for tonight.
"Safer down here," Kaylee says, kissing her cheek. Through the sturdy, ugly carpeting, River feels Serenity hum in agreement against her back, in her blood.
Mal smiles, makes her heart swell with gladness beyond fleshly pleasure they've been sharing. "More room to spread your wings, little albatross," he murmurs against her hair, hands sliding over the curve of her hips, down the length of her thighs, making her quiver with need.
"I think you should fuck me now," she answers, arching up under his touch.
He blinks at her plain speaking, shakes his head, and laughs hoarsely. "Tāmāde. The things you say." He looks at Kaylee. "You sure 'bout this, Kaylee?"
Kaylee's already sliding her hands beneath the waistband of his sleep pants. "Wouldn't be here if I weren't, Cap'n. Want to share with you. " He kisses her softly, slowly, as she undresses him, his hands gliding over her body, arms and hips and breasts, like he's trying to memorize her, and she returns each touch, before her hands come to rest sure and steady over his heart, the true engine that keeps them all flying. River watches them, fingers sliding against her own slick flesh, breathless with anticipation.
Kaylee gives him one more kiss, pats his pìgǔ with a saucy grin, and lies down on her side next to River, propping herself up on one elbow. She leans in and gives River a kiss, and River can taste hot need beneath the tenderness, banked now, waiting to kindle. She feels Mal's hands on her feet, thumbs circling over her ankles before sliding up over her calves, slow, warm, sure, no hesitation in him now that he's made his decision, set his course. He follows his hands with his mouth, kisses and licks up her legs, behind her knees, making her giggle--slow exploration of new territory that's always been off-limits, suddenly his for the taking. Kaylee alternates between watching him, heat in her eyes, and touching River herself, palming her breasts, smoothing over her collarbones, giving her long, slow, deep kisses that make her feel like she's floating.
She shivers when Mal reaches the sensitive skin of her inner thighs, pushes up into his hand when he brushes lightly over her quim, fingers dipping in to tease her.
"Mal? Please?" Her voice is high and needy, like the lonely cry of the albatross he's named her.
"Have to be made of stone to resist you," he murmurs, finally settling between her spread legs and pushing slowly inside her until she surrounds him. She doesn't point out that rivers always wear down stone.
She wraps her arms around him, sliding her hands over his shoulders--fingers drifting over freckles she didn't know he had but which she now wants to kiss one by one--and down his back, closing her eyes and feeling the shift and play of firm muscle beneath supple skin as he thrusts, delicious pressure spiraling high and tight inside her, stealing thought and breath away. She twines her legs around his, meeting each thrust with one of her own, wanting to feel every inch of his body, inside and out, and wanting him to feel hers the same way.
Kaylee hovers on the edges of her awareness, touching herself languidly as she watches, glowing with love and joy. Mal murmurs softly to her as they move together, but the wild roar of her own pulse drowns out his words. Doesn't matter--she can hear them sweet as birdsong in her head, beautiful and precious and good, so good, and the darker echo of guilt still clinging to the edges of his pleasure.
He slides a hand between their bodies, circles his thumb over her clit, and the tension in her finally breaks. Her body clenches around him, nearly drowning her in the fierce pulse of pleasure, and then she's flying free, broken and made whole by this dissolution. She tries to speak, to tell them how good she feels right now, and chokes on the words, only able to voice low, gasping cries. He holds her close, still driving into the tight embrace of her body as he shudders to his own release, his lips against her temple, breath hot and moist on her skin.
She drifts for a few long moments, riding out the aftershocks, and then he kisses her gently and rolls away. She opens her eyes, ready to protest, but Kaylee is leaning over her, smoothing damp hair off her forehead and kissing her tenderly.
"You okay?" Kaylee asks.
River grins and stretches like a cat, feeling as if all her bones are made of water. "Yes."
"Let's get you cleaned up, then."
Kaylee takes care of her--Kaylee's so good at taking care of her, sometimes it makes her want to cry from happiness--with a warm, wet washcloth and gentle hands, and by the time she's done, River's riding the wave of another orgasm, deeper and slower. It's making her sleepy, the low drone of the engines through the floor a lullaby. Only the buzz of Kaylee's barely satisfied desire humming beneath her skin keeps her awake.
With a smile and a kiss, Kaylee moves on to Mal, who's sitting against his bunk with his knees drawn up, hands clasped between them, still wrestling with his guilt even as he watched--and enjoyed watching--her with River. He should be used to her care, at least, but isn't yet. He protests, reaching for the washcloth.
"Can do it my own self. Ain't right for you to--"
Kaylee kneels in front of him, puts her hands on her hips. "You just hush now and let me do for you. Ain't a question of right and wrong. Just need and want. You need and I want, dong ma?" He mutters something about gorram spoiled women always having their way, and she says, "You're damn right I'm gonna have my way with you, Malcolm Reynolds. Been waiting on a chance for years. Not gonna pass it up now."
They both flush and look away at that. River knows Kaylee didn't mean to let that slip, but she can't help it. Truth flows from her--lies don't stand a chance in her presence. River clings to that sometimes when the nightmares come and she can't tell if she's dreaming or awake. Kaylee always shows her the truth, and she's going to do the same for Mal now.
"I'd've known that," he answers, his voice low, mind turning to dead ends and missed opportunities, "maybe the chance would've come sooner."
Kaylee lights up again, old anxiety laid to rest, and says, "Well, now you do," and sets about to do what needs doing.
River sighs with the rightness of it, all steps in time with the music only she can hear, and rolls onto her side to watch as Kaylee takes care of him. She's not jealous--doesn't understand how she could be, since Kaylee and Serenity both were Mal's first, and she was Simon's before she was Kaylee's or Mal's. Now they all belong to each other, and being upset about what came before takes energy away from things they could be doing now.
"Past is gone," she says softly, "and can't be changed. Need to let it rest and see to what can be." She smiles as she watches Kaylee coax Mal to hardness again, continuing with teasing hands and soft mouth after she's done with the washcloth. He sighs and twists under her touch, running his fingers through her hair. River smiles approvingly. "Your refractory period is shorter than expected," she says. "We appreciate that."
He chokes out a laugh and repeats, "The things you say."
She reaches out and runs a hand down Kaylee's back, feeling her quiver at the touch. "Kaylee's been very patient, but it's time you made her come."
Mal takes Kaylee's hand, brings it to his lips, then pulls her into his lap. "I agree."
Kaylee laughs and tosses her head. "You up for it?"
"I am now," he growls playfully, sliding a hand up her neck and into her hair so he can draw her in for a kiss, while his other hand skates over the sleek arch of her back, the soft curve of her bottom. She shifts, setting her knees on the floor to cradle his thighs, and rises up, one hand on his shoulder for leverage, the other guiding him inside her.
River sits up to watch--Mal's hands are splayed against Kaylee's lower back as she arches into him, loose and easy, but still in control. He licks and sucks at her breasts as she moves up and down, two-stroke piston in a beautiful engine, her hands clutching at his shoulders, tangling in his hair. They are rougher with each other than either has been with River, more familiar with this dance than she is, even if they've never danced with each other before, though they still have the easy playfulness River used to long for, before they shared it with her.
Now, she kneels up behind Kaylee and wraps her arms around her, one hand stroking down to find her clit and circle there, making Kaylee's head fall back against her shoulder, the other moving up to pinch at first one peaked nipple, then the other, earning her a stuttering gasp that rekindles the hot pulse between her thighs.
Kaylee keeps making those soft, gasping noises, and in perfect counterpoint, Mal answers with a steady stream of words, his voice hoarse and low and thrilling. "Just like that, darlin'." His voice breaks a little. "Fuck, Kaylee." He moves a hand between them, and River slides her fingers around his, holding Kaylee open to his touch, other hand slipping down to touch herself now, wet and aching for release again. His left hand moves down to clutch at Kaylee's hip, holding her steady, the way his gaze holds River now, making sure she knows he's loving her too, even when he's not touching her.
His intensity makes her feel like she's burning up from the inside out. It's too much--River closes her eyes, lets the sensation wash over her, mingling with her memories of them both touching her as she touches herself. Her eyes snap open when he says, "Come on, Kaylee. Come for me." She can see the flash of his teeth against the fluttering pulse in Kaylee's throat, and then his tongue soothing the sting away, and knows he's marked her. As he pushes forward to kiss her as well, both of them urged on by Kaylee's moans, River wonders what marks they've left on him, hopes they're ones he won't mind wearing, badges of honor instead of scars.
Kaylee stiffens for a moment in their arms, and lets out a low, choked moan before Mal kisses her again, swallowing the sounds as she comes, shuddering, in his arms, and he follows, held tight in her embrace.
River, caught in their gravitational field, lets the bright white spark and glow of their pleasure pull her along. She pulses like a soft gamma repeater when she comes, floating in the black. Kaylee rests her head in the crook of Mal's neck and River slumps forward, pressed up against Kaylee. Mal's hands come to rest on the small of her back, cradling them both, completing the circuit.
They stay like that for endless moments, close as people can be, and River knows this is the way they're meant to be, uplifted, wings unfurled to fly, then curled up to hold close what's dear.
The soreness between her thighs finally makes her move, and Mal and Kaylee slowly uncouple, Mal's eyes heavy-lidded and Kaylee's body heavy-limbed from satisfaction. River curls up on her side to watch them, sleepy and sated, whispering together as they clean up, soft things they've always said with actions instead of words. River smiles to hear it, because sometimes people need to say the words even if they already have the truth carved into their bones. Then Kaylee reaches out for her, draws her back into the circle of their arms, warm and easy, right where she belongs.
"Our girl," she whispers in the same awed, loving tone she uses when they've just pushed Serenity to her limits and she's come through with flying colors, lips ghosting over River's cheek, "our beautiful girl."
"Beautiful girls," Mal says as he pulls the blankets and pillows off the bed and then drops a kiss on the top of Kaylee's head. She and River make a little nest on the floor and curl up around him like kittens ready to sleep. He puts an arm around each of them, but River can already feel his worries returning, mind clamoring with questions of propriety, belonging.
"Not hers or mine or yours," she murmurs, yawning. "Ours."
"You two--"
"Three, with you," she corrects him gently. "Three is a good number. Lucky."
He sighs, breath warm against her hair. "Three don't work in things like this, little albatross. Always somebody feeling left out. Like a triangle, everybody always reaching for the point they can't have."
"Worked tonight." She reaches out and twines her fingers with Kaylee's, lays their clasped hands over his heart.
"I ain't saying tonight wasn't one of the best nights of my life, 'cause I'd be lying if I did. Kind of night a man'd have to be in the ground three days not to enjoy, but--"
"River says there's a triangle that's equal on all sides," Kaylee interrupts before he can start tying himself back up into the knots they've just loosened. "Could be like that."
River nods. "Love can't be quantified," she says. "Can't be contained, controlled. The more we give, the more we have, making us whole, greater than the sum of our parts. Wings unfurled and flying."
"But we ain't gonna fly right if we don't got all the parts," Kaylee says, pressing a kiss to his shoulder.
"Seems to me you two've been flying just fine without me interfering."
"Yeah, but it ain't right for us to be flying if you're still kissing dirt," Kaylee answers in a low voice, thinking of past hurts just recently begun healing. River tries to tell him this without words--brushes his hair back off his forehead, runs her fingers lightly over his face, feeling the strength of his bones beneath his skin, secret wishes writ in every one, wishes they can answer if he lets them.
His face takes on a mulish cast. "Don't need your pity."
River rolls her eyes. "Nĭ shì bái chī. Don't be insulting."
Kaylee shrugs a shoulder, tries to act like his resistance isn't bruising her already. "You don't feel the same, we've had our bit of fun, never bother you with it again. But if you think we're something you want, but you're too ashamed to say so...." She shakes her head. "Ain't nothing but hurt all around, then."
"Tāmāde. Ain't a question of want or need," he says, reversing Kaylee's earlier words. "It's about what's right or wrong."
"Ain't nothing wrong with people loving each other of their own free will," Kaylee argues before River can say anything. "You know it same as I do, Mal."
"Same love that keeps Serenity in the air. No shame in wanting that, or in having it," River adds. "Shame would be not taking it when we offer." She rests her head on his chest, feeling the yearning in him, the desire to relax and give in, though he's struggling with it still.
"Like Serenity, huh?"
"Like Serenity," River repeats firmly, gently, knowing no finely honed scruple or argument can stand against that. "Treat us proper, we'll be with you the rest of your life."
He sighs, yielding. For tonight, it is enough.
end
***
Feedback would be awesome.
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