(no subject)
Look, I know I asked, but that doesn't mean I have to like the answer.
When your boyfriend tells you he oh-by-the-way hooked up with his ex while he was home for Christmas, just before the 2 of you actually got together but still had started a thing. And then when I finally get past my own insecurities and ask him, some few weeks later, why they hooked up, if he was "nostalgic, horny or if it was y'know" and I'm desperately hoping for horny and one time 'cause then I wouldn't have felt so fucking stupid missing him and sending him stupid nostalgic messages on facebook new years 'cause I was fucking wasted.
But, noooooo, of COURSE not.
He says, "a mix, I guess" A MIX!? A MIX?!
and actually elaborates like I'm not feeling stupid and hurt enough like it is
"'Cause we were, like, together all the time and did stuff together and y'know, so when we spent the night together it just seemed natural"
And then followed by:
"but it wasn't like super intense"
I DON'T CARE HOW IT WAS!!
You had sex with your ex girlfriend who I'm feeling insecure about as it is while I was busy angsting over the fact that you were in fucking California and I wouldn't see you for 10 days!
I should never have asked, but I knew if I didn't it would just have festered in me.
But, seriously Simon, do you know how hurtful it is when you tell you girlfriend that you spent all your time at home with you ex and it felt natural that you were together together!?
How do you think that makes me feel when I know you're going back there this summer?
And I know this is 3 months later, and I know you really like me and I know I really like you, but still! You talk about her often anyway! And every time you mention her it's like a pang in my insecurities.
I know I'm being stupid, and I know Simon is a great guy who'd ever cheat in his girlfriend. All of this was just close to bursting out of me, and I still feel like I might cry.
ETA:
And then says this on msn
Simon says:
håndklædet lugter af dig:):):):):D:D:D:D
[The towel smells like you]
And I can't possibly be mad at him or anything
ETA:
Okay, well I lied. I'm not mad at him, per say. But, Hell, I don't know.
I just want him to hug me and say it didn't mean anything and that he's completely over her and that he only wants me.
Then my insecurities would be pretty much out of the way.
And I don't mind that he's still friends with her, it's not that at all.
When your boyfriend tells you he oh-by-the-way hooked up with his ex while he was home for Christmas, just before the 2 of you actually got together but still had started a thing. And then when I finally get past my own insecurities and ask him, some few weeks later, why they hooked up, if he was "nostalgic, horny or if it was y'know" and I'm desperately hoping for horny and one time 'cause then I wouldn't have felt so fucking stupid missing him and sending him stupid nostalgic messages on facebook new years 'cause I was fucking wasted.
But, noooooo, of COURSE not.
He says, "a mix, I guess" A MIX!? A MIX?!
and actually elaborates like I'm not feeling stupid and hurt enough like it is
"'Cause we were, like, together all the time and did stuff together and y'know, so when we spent the night together it just seemed natural"
And then followed by:
"but it wasn't like super intense"
I DON'T CARE HOW IT WAS!!
You had sex with your ex girlfriend who I'm feeling insecure about as it is while I was busy angsting over the fact that you were in fucking California and I wouldn't see you for 10 days!
I should never have asked, but I knew if I didn't it would just have festered in me.
But, seriously Simon, do you know how hurtful it is when you tell you girlfriend that you spent all your time at home with you ex and it felt natural that you were together together!?
How do you think that makes me feel when I know you're going back there this summer?
And I know this is 3 months later, and I know you really like me and I know I really like you, but still! You talk about her often anyway! And every time you mention her it's like a pang in my insecurities.
I know I'm being stupid, and I know Simon is a great guy who'd ever cheat in his girlfriend. All of this was just close to bursting out of me, and I still feel like I might cry.
ETA:
And then says this on msn
Simon says:
håndklædet lugter af dig:):):):):D:D:D:D
[The towel smells like you]
And I can't possibly be mad at him or anything
ETA:
Okay, well I lied. I'm not mad at him, per say. But, Hell, I don't know.
I just want him to hug me and say it didn't mean anything and that he's completely over her and that he only wants me.
Then my insecurities would be pretty much out of the way.
And I don't mind that he's still friends with her, it's not that at all.