Me talk goodly
Dear Keynote Speaker #1,
If I have paid money out of my own pocket to attend the conference at which you are speaking I would prefer to not spend your session correcting typos in your handouts (the plural of "other" is not "other's"). Of course it wasn't like I had anything else to look at, between your frighteningly bad PowerPoint (just say no to shadowed fonts for bullets) and the fact that although a stage was provided for the ballroom you decided to place your barely 5' self on the floor in front of the stage, and then remain rooted to one spot where you were effectively blocked from view by everyone in the first row.
No love,
Muse
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Dear Keynote Speaker #2,
Where did you learn public speaking skills? The Dan Quayle School of Fucking Up Expressions? Your presentation was on negotiations, and your PowerPoint repeated the phrase "What's yours is mine and what's mine is mine". However I believe in the five times that you actually spoke the phrase aloud you managed to get it correct exactly once. Your bungled attempts (which you didn't seem to notice) included such gems as "What's yours is mine and what's mine is yours is mine" and "What's mine is mine and what's mine is mine" and the classic "What's yours is mine and mine." Also: mumbling "you know" in the middle of every other sentence is not indicative of, you know, confidence in your, you know, subject matter.
You, you know, suck.
Muse
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In other news I had an epiphany of why I think I'm dissatisfied with my new job: at my previous company I did it all - logistics planning, proposal writing, RFPs, site selection, marketing and collateral design, vendor selection, contract negotiations, staff management, online registration management and site creation, PowerPoint creation, voice-overs, team-building, etc.
At my new job all I do is logistics.
On the one hand that's a good thing - I was working myself sick at the old job, wearing far too many hats and desperately needing a support team. On the other hand I feel that I've stepped backwards by taking on less variety of responsibility, and I fear that I'll lose my creative abilities with little to no opportunities to exercise them.
Perhaps it's just a matter of me still adjusting to only wearing one hat after five years of wearing the whole haberdashery. I'm just not sure. I don't lack for tasks (I'm swamped.) And I'm detail-oriented so logistics certainly suit me as a main function.
I think it's a combination of being a bit of a control freak so I miss not being in control of every aspect of my events, and also being someone with a fairly balanced right-brain left-brain personality which both want an opportunity to function. I like logistics but I loved working in marketing, and I loved managing the creative side of events (hello? theatre major? comedy-tragedy tattoo? occasional retarded rhetorical non-questions?), and I do miss that part.
.
If I have paid money out of my own pocket to attend the conference at which you are speaking I would prefer to not spend your session correcting typos in your handouts (the plural of "other" is not "other's"). Of course it wasn't like I had anything else to look at, between your frighteningly bad PowerPoint (just say no to shadowed fonts for bullets) and the fact that although a stage was provided for the ballroom you decided to place your barely 5' self on the floor in front of the stage, and then remain rooted to one spot where you were effectively blocked from view by everyone in the first row.
No love,
Muse
----------
Dear Keynote Speaker #2,
Where did you learn public speaking skills? The Dan Quayle School of Fucking Up Expressions? Your presentation was on negotiations, and your PowerPoint repeated the phrase "What's yours is mine and what's mine is mine". However I believe in the five times that you actually spoke the phrase aloud you managed to get it correct exactly once. Your bungled attempts (which you didn't seem to notice) included such gems as "What's yours is mine and what's mine is yours is mine" and "What's mine is mine and what's mine is mine" and the classic "What's yours is mine and mine." Also: mumbling "you know" in the middle of every other sentence is not indicative of, you know, confidence in your, you know, subject matter.
You, you know, suck.
Muse
------------
In other news I had an epiphany of why I think I'm dissatisfied with my new job: at my previous company I did it all - logistics planning, proposal writing, RFPs, site selection, marketing and collateral design, vendor selection, contract negotiations, staff management, online registration management and site creation, PowerPoint creation, voice-overs, team-building, etc.
At my new job all I do is logistics.
On the one hand that's a good thing - I was working myself sick at the old job, wearing far too many hats and desperately needing a support team. On the other hand I feel that I've stepped backwards by taking on less variety of responsibility, and I fear that I'll lose my creative abilities with little to no opportunities to exercise them.
Perhaps it's just a matter of me still adjusting to only wearing one hat after five years of wearing the whole haberdashery. I'm just not sure. I don't lack for tasks (I'm swamped.) And I'm detail-oriented so logistics certainly suit me as a main function.
I think it's a combination of being a bit of a control freak so I miss not being in control of every aspect of my events, and also being someone with a fairly balanced right-brain left-brain personality which both want an opportunity to function. I like logistics but I loved working in marketing, and I loved managing the creative side of events (hello? theatre major? comedy-tragedy tattoo? occasional retarded rhetorical non-questions?), and I do miss that part.
.