Drunken Tattoos and Exploding bananas
So tonight the 9-ball team I play for called, " The Team Who's Name We Dare Not Speak," played at Touchdowns. We won overall, but the pool playing wasnt the thing I want to focus on. For starters I didnt sleep last night, and took a little bit of a nap this afternoon. This means around 10:00 I got a little delrious, which with me is extra funny because I'm WAY more random than normal. Here are two prime examples. This one guy was drinking pretty heavily at the bar at Touchdown's because, as he kept shouting and swearing at people, it was his birthday. After he'd been drinking for a couple of hours he stumbles into me and says, " Hey man....Nice tattoo." It kinda took me off guard because 1.) He was plastered and 2.) I don't have a tattoo. It got me to thinking though, always entertaining nontheless, that there has to be some way of creating tattoos on people that can only be seen by the inebriated. The mental alteration that is created by alchohol has to skew perception in such a way that could be manipulated. I'd definately get one that says " You should stop drinking now." It could have great usues for law enforecement too! On every police officer's hand I propose a drunken tatoo of a smurf, sitting on a cow, hitting a tennis ball with a waffle iron, that way when they pull someone over, the person not being of sound mind anyway will start laughing and maybe even ask them about the tattoo. See, MILLIONS saved in breathalyzers and other various DUI tests right there. lol.
The other topic for the night: Why don't they make Banana flavored pop rocks? I mean they have dried bananas which are essentially the same texture.. why not make them explode? We can put a man on the moon, but we cant add a little boom to a banana? For that matter how are flavors picked for things like that? If you want to make the argument for the most well like flavors, I dont think it holds up. I mean take grape for instance. I dont know many people who actually like that artificial taste, but COMPANIES MAKE IT A FLAVOR FOR NEARLY EVERY CANDY! WHY? I dont understand. Do they just toss a whole bunch of fruit out of a plane and the ones land in a shape vaguely representing Lincoln's third cousin, twice removed of course, are the ones that make the cut? Man, that means the apples, strawberries, and lemons are insanely, inadvertantly fruits of unfathomable artistic vision. Wow... makes you think
Oh, and not related to those ramblings, I feel I must mention the confusion and laziness the packaging companies of certain food products have started to imprint into their products. The week before Mardi Gras the book store was handing out a peculiar item called a "King Throw Treat." I didnt know exactly what was inside, but appearently I was supposed to throw it. This is quite counterintuitive to all other food items I know of, which you eat....because they're FOOD ITEMS. Think about it; if everyone read the name of the product and followed it's latent instruction, the thing would NEVER get eaten. The laziness I speak of comes from the flavor indication of what of was in the silver foil. It read, " Orange, Banana, (Both Artificially Flavored) or Chocolate." Think about that... Is there ANY other item that you can think of that has 3 possibilities for what's inside? NO! YOU CAN'T BECAUSE IT'S STUPID AND LAZY!! Would you buy a silver box that had three possible outcomes inside? I wouldn't especially if two of them were poorly artifically flavored. I dont know, just struck me as odd :)
Oh, and I see Western Union finally paid attention to my warming about the squirrel conspiracy to run the world, and are now trying to warn others by showing a guy getting mugged and robbed by a gang of the little rodents. The guy tries to tell his bro what happened, but merely get laughed at. IT'S ALL TRUE! BEWARE THE ACORN!!!
The other topic for the night: Why don't they make Banana flavored pop rocks? I mean they have dried bananas which are essentially the same texture.. why not make them explode? We can put a man on the moon, but we cant add a little boom to a banana? For that matter how are flavors picked for things like that? If you want to make the argument for the most well like flavors, I dont think it holds up. I mean take grape for instance. I dont know many people who actually like that artificial taste, but COMPANIES MAKE IT A FLAVOR FOR NEARLY EVERY CANDY! WHY? I dont understand. Do they just toss a whole bunch of fruit out of a plane and the ones land in a shape vaguely representing Lincoln's third cousin, twice removed of course, are the ones that make the cut? Man, that means the apples, strawberries, and lemons are insanely, inadvertantly fruits of unfathomable artistic vision. Wow... makes you think
Oh, and not related to those ramblings, I feel I must mention the confusion and laziness the packaging companies of certain food products have started to imprint into their products. The week before Mardi Gras the book store was handing out a peculiar item called a "King Throw Treat." I didnt know exactly what was inside, but appearently I was supposed to throw it. This is quite counterintuitive to all other food items I know of, which you eat....because they're FOOD ITEMS. Think about it; if everyone read the name of the product and followed it's latent instruction, the thing would NEVER get eaten. The laziness I speak of comes from the flavor indication of what of was in the silver foil. It read, " Orange, Banana, (Both Artificially Flavored) or Chocolate." Think about that... Is there ANY other item that you can think of that has 3 possibilities for what's inside? NO! YOU CAN'T BECAUSE IT'S STUPID AND LAZY!! Would you buy a silver box that had three possible outcomes inside? I wouldn't especially if two of them were poorly artifically flavored. I dont know, just struck me as odd :)
Oh, and I see Western Union finally paid attention to my warming about the squirrel conspiracy to run the world, and are now trying to warn others by showing a guy getting mugged and robbed by a gang of the little rodents. The guy tries to tell his bro what happened, but merely get laughed at. IT'S ALL TRUE! BEWARE THE ACORN!!!