What a night
I woke up this morning in one of those forceful moods. The kind where you don't really want to face the world, but becuase your body will no longer let you sleep, you get up, and force your best foot forward.
I tried to put my game face on, but it was no better than yesterday's. In fact, I'm almost sure it's worse. I look tired and worn thin (metaphorically of course, seeing as how I'm not nearly as thin as I once was or wish to be). The last few weeks have been promising, optimistic, and exciting for me. It hit me today though, that my excitement has dwindled, the optimism gone, and the promise and goals are slowly getting farther away from being met.
I had this dream last night. Nothing specific really, one of those notorious 'mysterious person' dreams. One of those dreams that leaves you more unsettled than satisfied, although not a nightmare. I believe that dreams and other subtle patterns in one's life are directly correlated to events, actions, and emotions. and so I accept my unsettled-ness. and pray that tomorrow's dream will be a bit more pleasing (because I won't be sleeping tonight).
Pictures don't help an unsettled soul. Pictures are just a reminder of better times, because who would want to record a time when their life was in pieces? all pictures make me do is reflect on the particular event and time in my life, and when I take my emotions into consideration, I often find thatI don't miss it(it being the event or situation or person involved), I miss being happy. I'm not searching for a way to live in the past, I'm searching for a way to improve that feeling so that nothing in the past matters anymore.
By the way, I dont know why I update this thing anymore...its not like anyone reads it besides my ladie and Brandee...bah
I tried to put my game face on, but it was no better than yesterday's. In fact, I'm almost sure it's worse. I look tired and worn thin (metaphorically of course, seeing as how I'm not nearly as thin as I once was or wish to be). The last few weeks have been promising, optimistic, and exciting for me. It hit me today though, that my excitement has dwindled, the optimism gone, and the promise and goals are slowly getting farther away from being met.
I had this dream last night. Nothing specific really, one of those notorious 'mysterious person' dreams. One of those dreams that leaves you more unsettled than satisfied, although not a nightmare. I believe that dreams and other subtle patterns in one's life are directly correlated to events, actions, and emotions. and so I accept my unsettled-ness. and pray that tomorrow's dream will be a bit more pleasing (because I won't be sleeping tonight).
Pictures don't help an unsettled soul. Pictures are just a reminder of better times, because who would want to record a time when their life was in pieces? all pictures make me do is reflect on the particular event and time in my life, and when I take my emotions into consideration, I often find thatI don't miss it(it being the event or situation or person involved), I miss being happy. I'm not searching for a way to live in the past, I'm searching for a way to improve that feeling so that nothing in the past matters anymore.
By the way, I dont know why I update this thing anymore...its not like anyone reads it besides my ladie and Brandee...bah