random...
I don't even know who reads this thing anymore, let alone who writes in it. I miss it... Being able to rant and someone instantaneously telling you that it will be ok, we'll hang out tomorrow, and help to put a smile on your face. I hate that it's getting harder to put a smile on my face.
College is different. No better, no worse than high school I say. It's different. With every pro is a new con, one that would never have been brought to light before. It's weird how you take people for granted. Simple things, like eating lunch together everyday, making beautiful music every day, you really don't know how much you love it until it's gone. I love FSU. I honestly do. I don't do the party thing, really. It's a waste of my education. I like having fun, and I do it often.
But I'm scared for what my future will bring me. I hate being all pensive, yet it is always in the back of my mind. Where is this education leading to? What is my purpose? Why am i not following my one true dream? Or am I?
Who really knows. Actually, who cares! It's about living. I've been really happy lately. Granted, steam was let off this weekend, and the Hannah Montana movie really did uplift me for some bizarre reason, and I'm just enjoying everything. I smile randomly, I think of random thoughts, I randomly love being random.
I was told this weekend that I have a special quality, and I like thinking that. It's something I hold on to when I'm being told that I'm being nosy, or a drama queen, or that I'm acting immature or stupid. I'm me, and that's really the best part of all this. I love that it's possible to be upset and happy and miserable and pensive and content all at once. It puts things into perspective, well, for me.
I'm missing a lot. I'm missing my family, I'm missing my friends, I'm missing a lot of the activities that used to be a part of my everyday life. From that, I'm learning a lot, and I'm growing. I'm always growing. I love it when I'm miserable, and something will pop up in my mind to make me smile.
I hope you smile too, in the midst of your misery, knowing that there is always something to be happy for.
I think you'll be hearing a little more from me here... then again, I always say that.
Until next time-
Nikky
College is different. No better, no worse than high school I say. It's different. With every pro is a new con, one that would never have been brought to light before. It's weird how you take people for granted. Simple things, like eating lunch together everyday, making beautiful music every day, you really don't know how much you love it until it's gone. I love FSU. I honestly do. I don't do the party thing, really. It's a waste of my education. I like having fun, and I do it often.
But I'm scared for what my future will bring me. I hate being all pensive, yet it is always in the back of my mind. Where is this education leading to? What is my purpose? Why am i not following my one true dream? Or am I?
Who really knows. Actually, who cares! It's about living. I've been really happy lately. Granted, steam was let off this weekend, and the Hannah Montana movie really did uplift me for some bizarre reason, and I'm just enjoying everything. I smile randomly, I think of random thoughts, I randomly love being random.
I was told this weekend that I have a special quality, and I like thinking that. It's something I hold on to when I'm being told that I'm being nosy, or a drama queen, or that I'm acting immature or stupid. I'm me, and that's really the best part of all this. I love that it's possible to be upset and happy and miserable and pensive and content all at once. It puts things into perspective, well, for me.
I'm missing a lot. I'm missing my family, I'm missing my friends, I'm missing a lot of the activities that used to be a part of my everyday life. From that, I'm learning a lot, and I'm growing. I'm always growing. I love it when I'm miserable, and something will pop up in my mind to make me smile.
I hope you smile too, in the midst of your misery, knowing that there is always something to be happy for.
I think you'll be hearing a little more from me here... then again, I always say that.
Until next time-
Nikky