(no subject)
Well in the late hours last night i couldn't sleep so I went to wally world and bought 3 new dvd's and some snacks and came home and watched all 3 back to back. First one was "The Perfect Score" about a group of High School kids steeling the SAT answers. It was well enough to pass the time with. Then I wated "HERO" with Jet Li. Always good to get some Martial Art flick in the line up. Then I moved on to "Lost in Translation" with Bill Murray. It was a very interesting show. I'm not really sure what to say about it to be honest. I might go back to night and get "Kill Bill 1" & "Kill Bill 2" since they are only 13$ each.. I still havn't seen 2 yet since a SLACK ASS I know only had #1.
Part of me keeps thinking that I'm missing being outside and going to the beach. I really do miss these things but then I start thinking about driving my car to and from the beach all the time and that I can't afford to have it break down on me. I miss the feel of the water sliding along my skin and the weight of the sun long my back as it pour on to me through the water. I then think about how much my body hurts all the time. Even from little things that I do it seems to hurt. Maybe its just from lack of me using it and once past the first bit of pain it will be fine? I really don't know anymore. Somewhere along all this my mind starts to drift on to the fact that my life has no meaning. I'm just sitting taking up space not going forward or back just being. I want to move forward in my mind it says that, but I just don't know to what. School is a good thing, yet it scares the hell out of me. Maybe because it means i have to release the past and move forward. To be honest I want to go to school I just have no where to start with all this. Well I don't know where to start with it that is. I just wish someone would just take me up there and show me what to do this first time and how to get it all started. Just help me through this hard first step. I know they have people at the schools that it is there job to help, but theres alwasy stuff that people that know whats going on know what to ask that those people forget to tell us. I just don't want to miss something and it makes some major difference latter on down the road. BAHHHHHHH Ok enough of this. I have to jet off to work.
Part of me keeps thinking that I'm missing being outside and going to the beach. I really do miss these things but then I start thinking about driving my car to and from the beach all the time and that I can't afford to have it break down on me. I miss the feel of the water sliding along my skin and the weight of the sun long my back as it pour on to me through the water. I then think about how much my body hurts all the time. Even from little things that I do it seems to hurt. Maybe its just from lack of me using it and once past the first bit of pain it will be fine? I really don't know anymore. Somewhere along all this my mind starts to drift on to the fact that my life has no meaning. I'm just sitting taking up space not going forward or back just being. I want to move forward in my mind it says that, but I just don't know to what. School is a good thing, yet it scares the hell out of me. Maybe because it means i have to release the past and move forward. To be honest I want to go to school I just have no where to start with all this. Well I don't know where to start with it that is. I just wish someone would just take me up there and show me what to do this first time and how to get it all started. Just help me through this hard first step. I know they have people at the schools that it is there job to help, but theres alwasy stuff that people that know whats going on know what to ask that those people forget to tell us. I just don't want to miss something and it makes some major difference latter on down the road. BAHHHHHHH Ok enough of this. I have to jet off to work.