Office Hours: Wednesday Evening

[multi_madrox]

Jamie was quite busy in his office today. Really! He was. In fact he was filling out his grades for his students from the previous semester.

Only problem was Jamie's grading system and... well what would be considered normal grading system didn't match up

Comments

[scary_jeff]

His phone! It was ringing! Suddenly!

... So maybe Jeff was at the airport and, in a fit of break-up anxiety, was calling contacts with flagrant disregard for chronology in his life.

[multi_madrox]

Jamie picked up the phone without looking at the caller id. "Hi, you've reach Jamie Madrox. If you wish to speak to him you can start now. Especially if you have a free monkey."

[scary_jeff]

Jeff contemplated that one for a second before he answered. "Do they have monkeys on Lesbos?" he asked.

[multi_madrox]

"That depends on the migration pattern of-"

Jamie paused for a second.

"Jeff? Is that you? Why are you on a phone? I thought phones were evil."

[scary_jeff]

"Oh, no," Jeff assured him. "That's just answering machines and bidets, phones are fine. You have nothing to worry about!"

Yes, Jeff. Jamie was the one who needed reassurance.

[multi_madrox]

Bidets? Jamie wasn't going there.

"Ahh," Jamie said in understanding. "Good. But what do monkeys have to do with Lesbos?"

[scary_jeff]

"There was this woman," said Jeff.

Of course there was a woman. It was Jeff; there was always A Woman.

"She left with her ex. To Brighton. To explore their feelings. So I thought I'd just... leave and explore my feelings. On Lesbos. You're the one who brought monkeys into it."

[multi_madrox]

"Well I've always wanted a monkey," Jamie said leaning back in his chair. "I was just hoping some random person on the phone was giving them away. So how is that exploration of your feelings going on Lesbos?"

And why might Jamie be afraid of that answer.

[scary_jeff]

"I'm not there yet," Jeff admitted. "Turns out there's not as many last minutes to Lesbos as you'd think." He grinned. "Must be all the lesbians."

[multi_madrox]

"Lesbians on Lesbos?" Jamie inquired. "Well I guess that's one place to explore... your feelings. Meanwhile I've been hanging out here in Fandom. You should drop by here sometime and check it out. I'm teaching here and molding young minds for the future. Or something."

[scary_jeff]

"Really?" Jeff asked, derailed from the topic of lesbians.

Temporarily. Very temporarily.

"About what? Is it sex ed?"

[multi_madrox]

"Ooo. Sex. That would be a good topic," Jamie said writing down SEX in large letters on a whiteboard next to his desk and then underlining the word three times. "Though honestly its more of a potpourri of topics dealing with social and scientific issues that affect teenagers today. Like what flavor are doorknobs and how many licks it takes to get to the center of a-"

And then Jamie's mind veered. "Hey do you think they only have lesbian monkeys on Lesbos?"

[scary_jeff]

"It would seem logical," Jeff proposed, after a second or two, "That if they have any animals on Lesbos at all, they'd be lesbians too. I mean, discrimination's against the law, isn't it?"

That made no sense, Jeff.

[multi_madrox]

"Oh, yeah that totally makes sense," Jamie agreed. "But does that mean you're even allowed to visit? I mean you're not a lesbian. Unless this is one of those gender changing days for you."

[scary_jeff]

There was a long pause on the other end.

"I didn't really think of that. Oh god. Should I get a sex change?!"

Oh, Jeff. No.

[multi_madrox]

Even Jamie wasn't crazy enough to play with that.

"Uh. No," Jamie replied quickly. "Bad idea. Bad. Bad. Bad idea. Listen, Jeff, if you need to explore your feelings why don't you just come to Fandom for a bit? You can check the class, get bitten by a gremlin. You know. The fun stuff."