Cheers
ok, so I haven't posted in a while, thus I must play catch up. first, the 4th of july rocked. Bodalski and Luchko made their way to OC and we drank with the relatives. they are happy I am Irish, however, since all the girls bailed on me and only guys came, they're still wired I'm gay.
Midsummers was cool as shit. Hung out. Drank... that's about it. Cat's place is nice but will be all blowed up by school time due to a gas leak. um... that's all I can remember from that weekend.
ok, now onto a week ago. Went down the shore on monday in my new ghetto ride. I swear, the fucking weather waits till I leave to start pissing down rain. Wed I left for Long Island to see Lolla with Gillian. Little did I know this trip would be my own Odyssy. No, my own Illiad. No, not even the greeks could have imagined the sheer hell of the Long Island Expressway.
But I get ahead of myself.
first, I head to the parkway, then the AC expressway. No problems.
I get on the jersey turnpike which turns into 95. again, no problem. Then I have to cross the Gotham bridge or some damn thing. Cost me six fucking dollars. I thought that was an all time low, but it would get worse. If you had any doubt about how pretentious new yawkers are, just look at how much fucking money they charge to get into their damn city.
So then I go to the Verazanno bridge (the closer you get to the city, the more shit that's named for the Guinees, I swear to god)
then I hop on the staten island expressway. real peach of a road.
Then it's onto the BQE, that's the Brooklyn Queens expressway, and as I traversed this lovely highway, I see it. Gotham City herself, Manhatten, with her majestic spires climbing towards the heavens, and all I could think was "fuck you ass hole, you owe me fifteen bucks."
OH! and while I'm on this stupid highway, some indian douchebag in an suv in front of me slows to 20 miles an hour (or rather his bitch ass wife did) while he stand up outside the moonroof videotaping the shitty broken windowed wherehouses.
WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!
At this time my cd runs out, so I try finding K-Rock on the radio, but couldn't manage since I was following directions, so I settled for some stupid-ass hip hop station, which caused me to ask retarded questions to myself like "Why does my love got Biyonce Knowles lookin' so crazy right now?"
Then I try to light a cigarette. This was an experience in and of itself. one of the little "quirks" that comes with my old ass car is that it takes 250 pounds per squars inch of preassure on the button to make the drivers side window go up, so I can't do it while driving. And since the car's cigarette lighter is occupied with the plug from my disc man, I bough a lighter that was one of those gas things, that isn't affected by wind. but the childproofing on is rediculous.
there are three lights that flash on this damned thing, green, yellow and red. you have to wait for it to go to green before you can press the button to light it (I THINK). I'm not really sure, because they all flash so damned quick.
so here I am, trying to find something to listen to, trying to find the right roadsigns for the LIE, and all the while playing fucking Simon with my lighter just to grab a smoke.
I finally get to the LIE and I see a McDonalds with a big inflatable Ronald McD perched atop, his hand raised waving to motorist.
I gave him the finger.
Then I got to spend an hour on the god damned LIE in deadlocked traffic with road work going on. I was ready to kill myself.
Then I got to Gillian's house, or as I like to call it, Wayne Manner.
The girl is rich. I no longer have any doubts.
we get lost on our way to Jones Beach and have to do some serious Dukes of Hazzard style driving to get there, but we finally make it, just as Incubus is starting. you can check out her journal for details, but it was fucking awesome. Incubus, Audioslave and Jane's fucking rocked out. She met Brandon and came in her pants. great show overall.
And Incubus covered "Hello" by Lionel Richie. I was a happy camper. Then we watched Wet Hot America Summer. Michael Ian Black is the new Brodie.
then I drove home late thursday night, cause her mom bought us kickass dinner, and then Will and Grace was on, and then she had to show me Queer Eye for the Straight Guy which is hilarious, so I didn't get back to Ocean City till 3am.
But before that I took the wrong bridge, ended up in Brooklyn and almost got pulled over by Officer Vinnie Boombotz.
But I made it. and my car didn't explode! (then, but more on that in a later post)
I'm spent. snoogans.
Midsummers was cool as shit. Hung out. Drank... that's about it. Cat's place is nice but will be all blowed up by school time due to a gas leak. um... that's all I can remember from that weekend.
ok, now onto a week ago. Went down the shore on monday in my new ghetto ride. I swear, the fucking weather waits till I leave to start pissing down rain. Wed I left for Long Island to see Lolla with Gillian. Little did I know this trip would be my own Odyssy. No, my own Illiad. No, not even the greeks could have imagined the sheer hell of the Long Island Expressway.
But I get ahead of myself.
first, I head to the parkway, then the AC expressway. No problems.
I get on the jersey turnpike which turns into 95. again, no problem. Then I have to cross the Gotham bridge or some damn thing. Cost me six fucking dollars. I thought that was an all time low, but it would get worse. If you had any doubt about how pretentious new yawkers are, just look at how much fucking money they charge to get into their damn city.
So then I go to the Verazanno bridge (the closer you get to the city, the more shit that's named for the Guinees, I swear to god)
then I hop on the staten island expressway. real peach of a road.
Then it's onto the BQE, that's the Brooklyn Queens expressway, and as I traversed this lovely highway, I see it. Gotham City herself, Manhatten, with her majestic spires climbing towards the heavens, and all I could think was "fuck you ass hole, you owe me fifteen bucks."
OH! and while I'm on this stupid highway, some indian douchebag in an suv in front of me slows to 20 miles an hour (or rather his bitch ass wife did) while he stand up outside the moonroof videotaping the shitty broken windowed wherehouses.
WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!
At this time my cd runs out, so I try finding K-Rock on the radio, but couldn't manage since I was following directions, so I settled for some stupid-ass hip hop station, which caused me to ask retarded questions to myself like "Why does my love got Biyonce Knowles lookin' so crazy right now?"
Then I try to light a cigarette. This was an experience in and of itself. one of the little "quirks" that comes with my old ass car is that it takes 250 pounds per squars inch of preassure on the button to make the drivers side window go up, so I can't do it while driving. And since the car's cigarette lighter is occupied with the plug from my disc man, I bough a lighter that was one of those gas things, that isn't affected by wind. but the childproofing on is rediculous.
there are three lights that flash on this damned thing, green, yellow and red. you have to wait for it to go to green before you can press the button to light it (I THINK). I'm not really sure, because they all flash so damned quick.
so here I am, trying to find something to listen to, trying to find the right roadsigns for the LIE, and all the while playing fucking Simon with my lighter just to grab a smoke.
I finally get to the LIE and I see a McDonalds with a big inflatable Ronald McD perched atop, his hand raised waving to motorist.
I gave him the finger.
Then I got to spend an hour on the god damned LIE in deadlocked traffic with road work going on. I was ready to kill myself.
Then I got to Gillian's house, or as I like to call it, Wayne Manner.
The girl is rich. I no longer have any doubts.
we get lost on our way to Jones Beach and have to do some serious Dukes of Hazzard style driving to get there, but we finally make it, just as Incubus is starting. you can check out her journal for details, but it was fucking awesome. Incubus, Audioslave and Jane's fucking rocked out. She met Brandon and came in her pants. great show overall.
And Incubus covered "Hello" by Lionel Richie. I was a happy camper. Then we watched Wet Hot America Summer. Michael Ian Black is the new Brodie.
then I drove home late thursday night, cause her mom bought us kickass dinner, and then Will and Grace was on, and then she had to show me Queer Eye for the Straight Guy which is hilarious, so I didn't get back to Ocean City till 3am.
But before that I took the wrong bridge, ended up in Brooklyn and almost got pulled over by Officer Vinnie Boombotz.
But I made it. and my car didn't explode! (then, but more on that in a later post)
I'm spent. snoogans.