(no subject)
Dear Journal Memiors;
This will probly be my last writing. Let me give you a quick down low of my situation. I would say about 4 months ago, me and my family seemed to of pulled the last straw with one another. They asked me to change myself(which im still trying to figure how to do)or go ahead and move out. I decided the road. Well My (at the time)BestFriend in the whole world, said its okay, you can come and live with my family. :-D a golden opertunity. i took it of course, thinking "wow this is great! living at my bestfriends house with there family! im like the brother they never had." well i eventually was asked, and then told to move out after a month.(never did believe in the reasoning why, but maby im expose to find the true meaning out myself.) confused as hell and no place to go, my other friend offered me a place at there house. i took it without question because you half to admit, some of my best memories come from hanging out with this guy. currently i am still welcome. thank god. but i have decided i am moving out tonight. taking my things and moving to the woods. ever since ive not been at my parents house, ive believed that i dont really have a place to call my home. just "your" house. i actually talked to my parents and they said, that i couldnt even stay there tonight, just for one night. that i would be welcome back, if im working and doing well for myself. but the crazy thing is, is why would i want to come back if i was doing well. i call if i need help, and you would think your family is the one who would want to be there for you, when you need it most...i guess thats just a dumb idea. i guess they are still trying to teach me something now. they mentioned a homeless shelter, but i just wont go to one. its not like it would hurt my pride or anything. i just wont do it. i would rather live in the woods than in some state funded house. that still wont be my own. so the great outdoors is where im headed, with mother nature, because shes beautiful.(a girl i know is beautiful, but she confuses the hell out of me)
what ive learned from the last 4 months is this; Do Not Over Stay Your Welcome.
i have worked fulltime at one house, gotten kicked out. i was paying my own way, just didnt make sense. now i quit my job and went on a 2 week vacation. it was fucking awesome. but anyways, sleeping at someone elses house, eating there food, and drinking there water, without paying is what ive come to believe is something that i wont take from anyone anymore. because they can use it against you in the end. i always gave in the past and never asked for anything in return. now i dont ask for anything, people just give, and now they ask for something in return. what is it? i dont know. maby some god awful rule ive broken in the book of god, and i shall be banished from the land. fucking crazyyy. but all truth and thats why life sucks sometimes. Responsibility its now my main focus. i should have been supporting myself since i was the age of 10. but i didnt because i didnt have too. well im choosing to now. and thats why im heading to the woods. dont have to pay for roof, heat, cable, or any of the other expenses of living. Did you know there is a Death tax. So i cant freely die anymore. im gonna still be owing some motherfucker when i die. what the fuck. i asked my dad for a gun and 1 bullet because i think this life hes brought me to understand is bullshit. and thanks for being there pops when i needed you. but i guess theres some reasoning behind this too dad, and im just gonna have to figure it out on my own. Change my attitude is get the fuck out. well im out bro and im not coming back. and i wont be there if you ever need my help, so dont ask for it. k, thanks.
Life, Live, Learn
pc-im in the woods
This will probly be my last writing. Let me give you a quick down low of my situation. I would say about 4 months ago, me and my family seemed to of pulled the last straw with one another. They asked me to change myself(which im still trying to figure how to do)or go ahead and move out. I decided the road. Well My (at the time)BestFriend in the whole world, said its okay, you can come and live with my family. :-D a golden opertunity. i took it of course, thinking "wow this is great! living at my bestfriends house with there family! im like the brother they never had." well i eventually was asked, and then told to move out after a month.(never did believe in the reasoning why, but maby im expose to find the true meaning out myself.) confused as hell and no place to go, my other friend offered me a place at there house. i took it without question because you half to admit, some of my best memories come from hanging out with this guy. currently i am still welcome. thank god. but i have decided i am moving out tonight. taking my things and moving to the woods. ever since ive not been at my parents house, ive believed that i dont really have a place to call my home. just "your" house. i actually talked to my parents and they said, that i couldnt even stay there tonight, just for one night. that i would be welcome back, if im working and doing well for myself. but the crazy thing is, is why would i want to come back if i was doing well. i call if i need help, and you would think your family is the one who would want to be there for you, when you need it most...i guess thats just a dumb idea. i guess they are still trying to teach me something now. they mentioned a homeless shelter, but i just wont go to one. its not like it would hurt my pride or anything. i just wont do it. i would rather live in the woods than in some state funded house. that still wont be my own. so the great outdoors is where im headed, with mother nature, because shes beautiful.(a girl i know is beautiful, but she confuses the hell out of me)
what ive learned from the last 4 months is this; Do Not Over Stay Your Welcome.
i have worked fulltime at one house, gotten kicked out. i was paying my own way, just didnt make sense. now i quit my job and went on a 2 week vacation. it was fucking awesome. but anyways, sleeping at someone elses house, eating there food, and drinking there water, without paying is what ive come to believe is something that i wont take from anyone anymore. because they can use it against you in the end. i always gave in the past and never asked for anything in return. now i dont ask for anything, people just give, and now they ask for something in return. what is it? i dont know. maby some god awful rule ive broken in the book of god, and i shall be banished from the land. fucking crazyyy. but all truth and thats why life sucks sometimes. Responsibility its now my main focus. i should have been supporting myself since i was the age of 10. but i didnt because i didnt have too. well im choosing to now. and thats why im heading to the woods. dont have to pay for roof, heat, cable, or any of the other expenses of living. Did you know there is a Death tax. So i cant freely die anymore. im gonna still be owing some motherfucker when i die. what the fuck. i asked my dad for a gun and 1 bullet because i think this life hes brought me to understand is bullshit. and thanks for being there pops when i needed you. but i guess theres some reasoning behind this too dad, and im just gonna have to figure it out on my own. Change my attitude is get the fuck out. well im out bro and im not coming back. and i wont be there if you ever need my help, so dont ask for it. k, thanks.
Life, Live, Learn
pc-im in the woods